And my drawing of baby Caelan is coming out well. I hope. Oh hell what do I know. She drew her as a newborn, when she knew her. Fine. But she doesn't know the kid now. I do. So I'll draw her now.
**** I suck so bad at drawing
I am feeling like a painted world. I don't know anymore.
I can't decide if I love her or hate her. I want to be as lost as I got a couple nights ago and just stay that way forever. Just stay numb. Just think of all these things that make normal Kristina cry, and I can laugh about them. Hysterically. I can't look at it all through different eyes and say honestly I don't give a flying ****. Because I don't have the mind too. Here I am again and I care. I care about everything.
Tator's doing ok, by the way. No huge changes that I see. My baby.
I went to the SPCA to visit and steve will volunteer with me, and I read a lot of HP.
Came home and went to the airport to get my gramma. We went out to olive garden. I was not impressed. But maybe that's just me. The salad was generic with limited dressing types, the bread was too hot to touch, my spaghetti was WAY too mushroomy for my taste, but I'll admit my pumpkin cheesecake was absolutely amazing. I have the worst garlic breath now though. Ugh I hate it. Not from the cheesecake though, from the spaghetti. Obv.
I went back to steves after and we're watching a movie called The Other Guys. It's pretty alright. WAy too much action to keep my mind on task, but I can sortof follow the rest of it.