Working Blues!

Well, I will eventually have to go back to work. I am not looking forward to it at all. I used to love my teaching job.I still love working with the children and knowing I am making a difference. It just gets more physically challenging each passing year with my fibromyalgia. I've been out from the end of May until now for summer and 2weeks for surgery. I know how I feel now and I know how I will hurt so much worse when I return to work. At the beginning of each school year, we have to sign insurance papers and make any changes etc. I went today (still not working) to sign my papers. I had a disability policy that kicked in after 60 days. I upped that coverage to kick in after 4 days. So, if I become disabled for any reason or am out for surgery again, it will kick in and start paying on the 5th day. It only pays a % of my salary. To cover my fibromyalgia (pre-existing condition), if declared disabled b/c of it, I must wait one year from today since I increased the coverage. So, this time next year, this disability insurance might be enough to get us through with our bills and such until I might could get approved for SSDI. This insurance will pay benefits up to 5 yrs if declared disabled from my profession and up to age 65 if declared disabled from any job. I can maybe see some light at the end of this long dark tunnel that I've been in for so long. I could not just quit and wait for SSDi decission, so this is a beacon for me. I just keep wearing myself down more and more by pushing to work b/c I have to pay bills. All I do is work and rest. Nothing else. No life at all. I think this may be great news for me. I could still volunteer and do some good for the children, but not be killing myself in the process. I can surely survive working one more year!!! I just hope that I am understanding everything correctly.