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Ranting!!! ; )

Aug 21, 2008 02:57PM - 8 comments

ok so first im going to start off by saying, im grateful for all the advice i receive from this site. granted i may not agree with all that is said to me (however i DO agree about the baby issue) but i take it into consideration. however my issue is here: i see some girls on this site that are like 16 and 18 (not judging the ones who have babies already or anyone) that are TTC and wanting to have a baby and i see some ladies actually giving tips on getting pregnant!!! not all the ladies on here do that; but some do. now my rant and rave problem is that im 22 have a stable job for the past 4 years and bf is 23 stable job (better job next month) been together 1.5 years (i know some of u know we have had issues in the past) and im the one having everybody tell me not to have a baby that im too young and not ready. i do however AGREE with what was said to me, and me and bf are not TTC at this point. but i just want to know WHY is it ok for a 16 and 18 year old to want and try for a baby and actually be given pointers and tips?!?!?! just my thing, sorry for the rant....but im sitting here at work and i just thought of this now.

: )

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by AJH84, Aug 21, 2008 03:05PM
The people giving out tips to teens to get pregnant are morons. I mean, what do they care...they won't be the ones dealing with the situation.
Trust me, the teens who get "tips" often get WAAAY more real advice from the people on this site who are NOT morons telling teens it's all fine and dandy to get knocked up.
That's why we're all so glad that you were one of the few who actually took what we said to heart and have decided to hold off on TTC until you're better prepared for it.

by mami1323, Aug 21, 2008 03:34PM
Oh believe me, there are a bunch of us on here that try and tell them to wait.  It's the other ones that come in and say "oh if they feel they are ready then they should do it" or "sometimes young mothers are better then older ones".  I've been giving plenty advice to young girls telling them to wait and I get told that I'm being judgmental.  In no way shape or form am I knocking them, I'm giving sound advice.  So just know, some of the ones giving advice are already teens that are pregnant or it's people who think that there is nothing wrong with it because these teens are going to do what they want to do anyway.  Glad you can at least open your eyes and see that we are only trying to tell you from experience.  

by gokuangel, Aug 21, 2008 03:38PM
I try not to say nothing cus the whole subject just erks me to death!!! its so annoying and im like of course they can get prego teenagers always can!! but at any rate it was not me doing it and i totally agree with you and im glad medhelp has started to block that stuff!!

by peekawho, Aug 21, 2008 03:43PM
Sometimes, just sometimes, we give advice that is difficult to hear, because we care.  Because many of us made mistakes or unwise choices and had our whole lives affected.  Sometimes we recognize a spark in someone that makes us think that the poster might, just might, listen and learn from us.

If I didn't care, I'd keep my mouth shut.  Sometimes you can tell that someone is fixated and not going to listen.  Other times, it seems like it might be worth a try.

We just want all babies to have the best start possible.  That's all.  I'm sorry you felt you didn't get the answers you wanted.

by suzi-q, Aug 21, 2008 04:32PM
It is a shame that medhelp doesn't screen lots of the members on this site....half are morons like one of the above posters said.  Too bad we don't have to prove our mental stability!!  LOL....You were very lucky to have sane people answer your post.  You have to be very careful who you listen to on this site...some are whacko!!!

Peek- you took the post the wrong way!  She is happy for the sane advice given to her....GO HAVE YOUR COFFEE!  :-)

by babyscience, Aug 21, 2008 04:40PM
Those people giving advice should be whipped...haha, j/k.  I dont think anyone here intentionally gives advice to younger people.  There are times where posters may not even state their age, so that may have some confusion.  I dont think you are too young to have a baby.  I think you may have some things you need to get together first, but all that can happen in a short year.  So I dont know who told you you were too young, but I think most mothers know how hard it is to raise a child.
I think you said in a different journal you were scared you may not be able to have children and I think that is a legit reason to start thinking about a family...just as someone might in their 30's or 40's.  So my opinion to anyone ttc is just get everything out of your system now...go to school, if you are engaged then get married (because your body wont be how you envisioned it on your wedding day), travel and just have fun with your partner.

by mschlegel44, Aug 22, 2008 10:37AM
Those people have lost their minds!!! You do sound like you are doing well for yourself. My last comment was only meant to help you! Please do not feel that I don't think you should have a baby! Every woman knows when she wants a baby. You will know when you are ready! And those BABIES having BABIES, that is sad and a different story!!!

by Soon2BMrsTurner, Aug 22, 2008 01:55PM
Its not ok , Nobody can stop them but that doesnt make it ok. I love my kids more than anything but I wish that I had done things different so I wouldnt have had to work to hard to get where I am now. I dont think that people telling a 16 year old how to get pregnant is saying much for that person.

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