A monster called paranoia (2/13/2011)

They say that there is noting to fear but fear itself. Did they know the monster called paranoia.
Its not like the monster that ripped your heart out and ate it. No its much worse then that. It comes to you in moments where you think your safe. It reaches its hands deep into you. Feeling for just the right weakness, it whispers into your ear waiting for hopelessness to find you. When it finally says the right word your heart cries out and it drinks the tears. You Feel it beating fast and the monster laughs at you. It leans forward and says your heart its breaking I think its having an attack. Your mind fills with panic soon you begin to cry out but your words are silenced by the beast.

"It might be something but its nothing to everyone else." It digs its self into you deep as you begin to panic what do you do?
What can you do. How should you act. Soon the monsters very veins are mixing with yours its taking you deeper into the fear into the nightmare.


Perhaps you act you do something anything to make yourself think your all right. You push the monster away and it laughs telling you its had its way with you now and again but it will be back the moment you even feel a slight fear.

Now you sit with the doubt, the fear, and you feel drained. You wish for it all to be over you don't want to feel this way. You may even tell yourself its gone and maybe if you do this or that it won't happen again.

One day you feel the fear it spoke of and it comes back. With each time it changes you little by little until see the monster and call it a demon. You ask "What are you", "What is your name" but it only smiles.

On that day you fight it and wrestle with it. You attempt to kill it to drive it away. You take your blade and stab it. The monster smiles and with that it leans in on you in a almost ghost like movement. as it leans on your shoulder it whispers

I am you!

With that the monster vanishes you feel faint. You feel weak, numb. You collapse to the ground only then do you see that it was you who was stabbed.
by matthew d








I'm paranoid and at times it shows me the monster deep within me. It comes at night to bring fear into my heart.