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Disapeared

May 23, 2011 - 5 comments
Tags:

crazy

,

online

,

Lost

,

daze

,

Mental Health

,

scared



Some of you might know. Others probably have no clue. Well I disapeared from the online world. Havent been on this site in ages. Not even sure when I was last here. Things have been crazy. I dont even know anymore. Just feel so lost and defeated by everything. Feels like everything passed me by. Been in a daze. I cant even remember why I left or what made me. I only know it was my mental health. Totally out of wack. I know people who know me might have a lot of questions but I dont know the answers. I cant explain why or where. I was just there I guess out of it. I feel awkward and embarrassed. Looking down. Just dont know. Im back for now. Ill just say my mental health got really bad. And I cant even get help. I needed it then but no insurance. I guess Im sorta ok. Im able to be here and make posts and Im writing this journal. I feel like I come and go. Maybe a nervous breakdown. Just scared over this and everything. So Ill try to be here agian. But I dont know. Cant garentee Ill be here all the time. Could be gone agian and come back. Who knows. All I know is I disapeared. But for now Im here. Back.

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by nursegirl6572, May 23, 2011
Welcome back!

We all have issues that take us away for a while, but if you find help and comfort here, most definitely try to stick around!

Not only will you help others, but you help yourself in the process...just by sharing your experiences and what you've been through.

This site has been such a source of support for me, I couldn't be happier I found my way here years back. I have also "disappeared" from time to time due to issues going on in my life...but I always follow the breadcrumbs back "home".  I've also "met" some amazing inspirational people here that are such a great source of strength for me on bad days.  MH is full of such unique and astounding people.  I've even made friends here that I couldn't imagine my life without.

I'm glad you found your way back!  :0)

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by amylove21, May 23, 2011
Hey there I'm glad you were able to come back. Hope that being here will help you. I know we used to talk on mental health chats before you left. You me and the other person that was there. I think she's still around if you haven't talked to her allready. Welcome back. As you know I come and go based on my busy scedual and stuff going on. I know I try to come on here and post every so often when I can't be here all the time, but yeah sometimes things get in the way and you have to be gone awhile. Yeah I think coming here does make me see that it helps me and other people too when I'm here.

Oh have to get ready and go to the bank so I will check later on sometime when I get back to see if you have posted on the group agian. I left you a welcome back there too.

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by innerchild09, May 25, 2011
Thanks for the responces and the welcome backs. Glad Im not the only one to pull a disapear. I guess that happenes when things get in the way. Im glad I am back though. Its been really nice being back. Plus I am doing better then I was. Still worried things are going to start up agian. If they do then they do. Still for now I am just glad to be back. Thank you both of you.

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by EternalRage, Jun 05, 2011
i disappear from online for decades. i like to disappear from where im at. i leave with people wondering what happened. i call myself a ghost. online is the only way im not off the grid. i currently hate where im at, PA. trying to get where i want to be, NC. it has been an ongoing struggle trying to stay out of PA & staying in NC. there is always something to kick me in the face when i get ahead. i literally almost had a heart attack 3-4 weeks ago & refused to go to the hospital because i hate my environment, i have no insurance & dont want the debt, and im not sure how much i care anymore. my surroundings are killing me and i am stuck. i ahte feeling stuck or trapt. could feeling stuck or trapt explain why you disappear?

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by innerchild09, Jun 06, 2011
Ok I think yes for sure that being stuck and trapped could do it, Maybe stress overload. I have both going on. I know maybe Im sorta like a ghost too. Its like Im here then Im not. Not even sure how to describe it. I hate where I live I hate everything about where I live. i hate being stuck in the house and I hate that everytime I try to do something I get knocked down by someone or something. Always. I dont have insurance either so I get the whole dont want to go to the doctor thing I would probably go if I thought I was having a heart attack but I try to avoid going as much as I can because of the insurance. Its hard. You know whats the worst thing. I mean I dont want to disapear because theres people that I talk to and I leave them wondering and I feel I hurt them and stuff. But at the same time sometimes I dont even care anymore. Not about being here. I do want to be here but if I disapear agian. I dont want to be trapped anymore. I dont want to think about anything. I dont want to leave cuz I like it here and cuz my friends but its like I dont want to think about all this. And I dont know when you disapeared if you knew what you were doing or anything but I didnt. Anyway thanks for sharing this.

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