All Journal Entries Journals

What do i do?

Sep 12, 2011 - 1 comments
Tags:

Is

,

dos

,

what ??

,

What do I DO

,

Work

,

ovulation tracker

,

not?

,

No

,

Me!

,

TV

,

toes

,

mother

,

school



I watch my nieces when their mother is at school or work. They will not listen to me, no matter what i do they do not behave! We have tried everything, spanking, grounding, taking previlages away, a token system where if they do chores and their homework they get a token to watch TV. They just do not listen. What can i do, they just will not listen!!!!!

Comments
Post a Comment
1706625_tn?1343065313
by annaluna, Sep 14, 2011
How old are they??


I  have watched alot of kids in my day........and when kids normally dont listen it is because they are testing us, , one thing that never worked was spanking, sometimes it would just make a child that will not listen just think it is funny and continue on their way, , do they listen to their mom at all, or are they the same???

try gettin to the childs lwevel and look them in the eyes (they hate tht)
start off by saying there name, and ask them with a please as well,.
be simple with direction, kids tend to side track
ask them to repeat what u have asked them to do
like when they are jumpinm on the couch for instance, instead of get down! say i want you to get down, so use i want's alot. also be positive, instead of no running, say inside we walk, you may run outside
telll them when u want them to do something, say when you brish your teeth, THEN we will play a game ect......
give choiices, like do want to pick up toys first or read a book for 15 mins??
dependin on their age, many people will ask a young child "why did you do that?...try saying lets ta;l about what you did,
nno matter what the age expect them to be polite, , they can learn please, speak to them like you want them to speak to you
Threats and judgmental openers are likely to put the child on the defensive. "You" messages make a child clam up. "I" messages are non-accusing. Instead of "You'd better do this..." or "You must...," try "I would like...." or "I am so pleased when you..." Instead of "You need to clear the table," say "I need you to clear the table." Don't ask a leading question when a negative answer is not an option. "Will you please pick up your coat?" Just say, "Pick up your coat, please."

The louder your child yells, the softer you respond. Let your child ventilate while you interject timely comments: "I understand" or "Can I help?" Sometimes just having a caring listener available will wind down the tantrum. If you come in at his level, you have two tantrums to deal with. Be the adult for him.

If a matter is really closed to discussion, say so. "I'm not changing my mind about this. Sorry." You'll save wear and tear on both you and your child. Reserve your "I mean business" tone of voice for when you do.


Get behind the eyes of your child
Children don't think like adults. Kids try crazy things and think crazy thoughts—at least by adult standards. You will drive yourself crazy if you judge a child's behavior from an adult viewpoint. A two-year-old who runs out into the street isn't being defiant, he just wants his ball back. Action follows impulse, with no thought in between. A five-year-old likes her friend's toy so much that she "borrows" it. An adult may stop and weigh the necessity, safety, and morality of an act, but a young child doesn't.


Post a Comment