Jan 28, 2008
I have finally found a guy that I trust, I feel safe, I can be be intimate with, and who means something to me only to realize that there is a huge chance that I can never give him that intimate side of me. The thought kills me, for years it was just taken from me, something that personal just taken, and now after so much work getting over that I fear that I'm allergic to him. Every time he pulled out to ejeculate any semen that came in contact with me gave me little bumps but I didn't thinki anything of it since I have such sensetive skin. The fact that sex hurts with him didn't flash warning signs since from all I've known sex is suppose to hurt most of the time. Last night though after he actually came directly on me, and then latter in the night practically inside of me I could no longer ingnore the pain. Where he came on my but is a swollen welp looking rash directly where it touched and now my entire vagina is irritated. The fact that I'm allergic to latex doesn't help.
Isn't it ironic.
I find someone worthy of having all of me
someone I'd willingly give all of me
and he's the person I can't give that to.
((photo from our one month))