Proud of myself but so very sad

My husband went from the positive frame of thought, and wanting to work on us that he was in last night back to being completely confused, pained, and negative.
However I feel that I handled his change in emotion very well and in a healthy way that was emotionally supportive for him without being submissive and comprising my emotional health either.
I let him know that I was no longer in a paniced rush for him to decide on what he wanted as far as our relationship goes.  And that even though my choice was still to be together and work on a happy healthy life, I have realized both he and I can achieve that life with or without each other, I know longer want to base my happiness on him and "us".
So I am here to discuss anything he wanted to talk about, but unless he initiated the contact I will give him the space and time to figure out his true feelings.
I'm very proud of myself for not allowing myself to react in the negative damaging way I have done in the past. Even if what my initial reaction was to break down and sob in disparate pleas.
However now that he's not on the phone with me, I am going to allow myself to be sad at the step backwards in this agonizeing waiting game.


My Bipolar Tracking