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I did the weirdest thing- this happened to anyone else??

Mar 06, 2008 04:48PM - 4 comments
Tags:

anorexia

,

weight

,

weird

,

eating disorder

,

fat

,

help

,

chocolate

,

Weight Loss

,

Anxiety

i did something really weird last night
i like bought a packet of chocolates... like the ones where they are like 15 in a packet and they are individually wrapped..
(i wanted to see if i could eat them...one at a time... without feeling bad..)
they are 90 cals or soomething each.
But then last night i had an anxiety attack..
the packet wasnt open yet as i just bought it.
i TORE it open and chucked them...one by one.... out onto the road out the front of my house
and then watched them get crunched one by one when the cars came...
it made me feel better!!
but how weird is that!!
i wanted them out of the house incase i ate...like 2 at oncce and felt guilty about it and did something stupid
But i feel like such an idiot now!!

im 50kg and 165cm for those that are asking. but apparently i look like a weigh less. like when one of my lecturers where a study was like....
"'OMG u look like u have come from concentration camp. how much do u weigh and how much have u lost?"
i was like....
"um about 5 kg..."
(i have always been close to her and wasnt going to lie)
and now i weigh like.... around 50 (kg).."
and she was like...
"no way you dont weigh that much!!"

arrgg it made me feel hell fatt!!

it made me think i should weigh less or something..
i dunno.
can't think anymore!!
btw she was a nurse too!! :--S

Comments please!!!!!




Comments
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by kkai8, Mar 06, 2008 07:32PM
How old are you?
I feel that based on your age this can really determine if your behavior is something to be concerned about.
When I was young I used to "freak out" about my weight, cellulite etc.
I was not overweight either, but as women are bodies do change and I think we understand this less originally thought. we think.
Now, that I am 22 I weigh more than before, I am still not overweight, but I am very comfortable
with my body. I simply just care less than I used to.  I think only you know, if you are suffering from an eating disorder or not based on reading your post.

by keephope558, Mar 06, 2008 09:01PM
Hey...I've been reading your posts. Thank you for sharing with us. I have thrown food in the trash, toilet, sink, out the window of the car, and smashed it on my plate with a napkin so it wasn't appealing anymore.  I have never been fat in my life, yet somehow focused on my weight. I'm 5"10 and usually around 140 lbs. but sometimes when I'm nervous, anxious, sad or feel out of control....I take it out on my weight. I exercise, smoke a lot, and don't eat enough fat or carbs and drop weight like crazy.  Not because I think I'm fat....because it makes me feel like I've accomplished something.  My lowest weight was like 125.  Looks great if you want to model for Calvin Klein....not so great if you want to do normal things like play sports, work, go out to dinner, go dancing, etc. My energy level was so low....I fel depressed....pretty moody....and just out of it. I know how you feel when ppl say "you don't look like you weigh that much."  It makes you feel fat even tho they're actually telling us we look skinny!!! sigh.....the sad thing was I was a fitness trainer for like almost 3 years which seemed to make me obsess about weigh even more.  Well, hope this helped....for us Yanks we have no idea how tall you or how much you weigh because of the different measuring systems, but I'm gonna try to find out. Keep writing.

by nuggetone, Mar 06, 2008 10:11PM
Are you like 5' 6" and 120 pounds?   If so that is thin and I wouldnt worry about that chocolate.  But just dont get so thin .  See I am from the Tn and not sure on those measurements either.  

by jules815, Mar 23, 2008 11:53PM
use the morsel diet mariah carey used it to lose 30 lbs and now i do it 2 and stay thin without feeling deprived.i have 3 kids and have to keep some snacks etc in the house so when i get the erge i take a small bite or 2 and walk away

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