national condom month

February is national condom month!!! Does it mean you only need to wear one in february? No, it means you should be utilizing barrier protection EVERYTIME YOU HAVE ORAL OR GENITAL SEX with a partner who's status you aren't aware of !!  That's right - I said barrier protection - not just wear a condom. What is barrier protection? Well it's not putting up a 10 foot wall around your borders to keep people out that's for sure though if you surround yourself with walls I suppose no one will get in to have sex with you so that would be protection too...he he he !   Using barrier protection for sex is  putting a protective layer of material between you and body fluids. OMG Gracie - you mean I should be using protection for oral sex too? Ah yup you should be if you don't know your partner or they haven't been tested for std's recently.  For giving a male oral sex - it's pretty easy - make him wear a condom and perform oral over it. They make flavored condoms and you can find them pretty easily even in most stores nowadays. You can also mail order from any number of online sources - even amazon carries them if you prefer not to have someplace like condomania delivering packages to your doorstep for mom and dad to see ( what did you order this time dear - oh it's my book I needed for english class mom ...he he he - they'll be so proud of you!!!  ) .  You can also buy flavored lube to help with the taste a bit too.  Some companies even package them all together for you in individual packages so that you can keep a few in your backpack or your purse ( you can keep them in your car too but keep in mind that heat destroys the latex ).  It's a bit more expensive to buy them that way but it sure is convenient!  So what about performing oral on a female? Well you can still use a condom - just cut it open and lay it flat over their genital area while you perform oral sex .  You can also use saran wrap but it has to be the non-microwaveable kind which I haven't been able to find in any grocery store near me so good luck with that one. Just because oral sex is a lower risk for std transmission - it's not a no risk and you should be using precautions for both giving and receiving.  

I think most of us know that we should be using a condom for sex - but when do you put it on?  I think most of us wait until actual penetration after quite a bit of "messing around" has went on. They work best though to protect you if you put the condom on when the clothes come off - don't wait for actual penetration.  This has even been shown in a fairly recent study to reduce the risk of hpv infection too which is also important - even if you have had your hpv shot!   If you aren't sure how to put on a condom - this link has a  short pretest and a cute video to show you how to do so - http://www.ashastd.org/condompretest.cfm

If you've ever read any of the posts on the std community or the herpes community - about half of them are due to folks who have had unprotected oral sex or unprotected genital/anal sex and are now worried about std's or they have symptoms that they first need to rule out std's from before they can really figure out what is going on. Think of how quiet the boards would be if everyone used barrier protection for all forms of sex if they and their partners hadn't had full std screenings together? Jess and I could take up other hobbies like cross country skiing, weight lifting, running, bridge, decoupage or even learn a new language or something :)  ( ok so probably we'd just watch more tv but really - you never know )

Just be smart and responsible about your sexuality :)  We know that talking about std's and risk for them isn't "romantic" but it's the thing we should all be doing. You don't want to find out you have a std AFTER you've transmitted it to a partner. You also don't want to find out that you have hiv AFTER you've started being sick. And really - we have enough to worry about right now - why add worrying about what you did with a stranger saturday night to the list?  

grace