party rock

mean mr mustard lives in a shop he never stops he's a go getter

sigh.  I am now officially out of lithium.  yes i called it in.  ill pick it up tomorrow.  

one summer, when i was fifteen, i decided to read Gone with the Wind.  that was before the days of Kindle and the summer body project.  i was naturaly skinny then.  oh to be young ... it was this huge heavy book that my sister had.  she let me borrow it.  and i did it.  it has indelibly enrichedmy life.  i will think about it tomorrow.

its hell here.  im in hell.  i dont have to worry about rotting in hell becuz im paying now.  oh my good lord.  i just dont know.

once, on npr, i heard this horrific segment about this middle eastern guy ... i forget what country.  syria?  this guy was involvd in some kind of underground anti govt movt.  they collected, shot and archived videos of the gunfire, conflict etc.  well this one video came in of all these men dead.  just on the floor of some bldg shot to death.  and the guy watched the video like skimmed it like oh how horrible hm shelve that one or pass it on.  and his mother called him.  she told him 'watch it again' and he watched it closely.  and there was his father.  his father.  oh god.

why i ever complain about anything imsure idk

wow i feel completely depressed now.  well that sure helped to tell you that!

on a lighter note, i heard that song by whatsherface today.  that girl taylor not so swift?  yah.   like ever.  EVER!

that song cracks me the fuh up.  and he has some indie record like, way cooler than mine.  .. how are either of these scenarios possible?  can u pleez listen to sommore indie records tay so they might influence you?  like LOTS of indie records.  LOTS!

like if Katie holmes ever wrote a song it would sound like that one by taylor swift.  if she ever did.  ever.

idk what im saying im sorry!  just trying to lighten things up a lil

he is a mothertrucker.  he really really is.  and i hate him.  i so do.  like so.  i do.  no i dont!!!!! god why did i ever say that i do my a$$

my friend said he or a group of guys and him would come over and f*ck my hub up.  that actualy sounded like a good idea to me for a few minutes.  i mean its a nice fantasy ... ummmmm.   oh yeah mmmmmmmmm

im just joshin man hey

So.  would u like to heer about my productive day?  hold on the space heater is frying my hair

ooh split ends!  nasty

well.  since you asked!  first, i worked out hard and did my weights. god i am so buff.  i could eff my hub up all by myself! hold on ima go try it    sike!

i _think_  YG is playing tonite oh yay!  i so want to be there

ok um.  then i did the chores around this dang house.  ugh!  is right!  then i took up all my lil courage and bang down the door o the house next door yah my house!  i dint want to see cuz the new house make me jellus.  but i took up my courage and go in like gangbusters!   yay there was a working dude in there oops.  and he show me tha house.

well i dun try to conceal my dismay cuz he did the work but i hated it!  yah the color my hub chose for the lr is as i predicted dreadful.  and the floors my dear old worn warm wood floors all sanded and blond and new look ugly as fuh!!!  yeh yay!  and the kitchen floor oh my goodnis it is like technicolor barf!   needles i was glad this aint gone be my house!  it was a huge relief.  i said 'see meegy you getting yoursel all upset for weeks and ya dont even likes it

' end quote

so yeah

and  i got my transcripts out my studio and i left.

so den.  i pack a bug lunch and i got out to kinkos where i met my buddy Grayson.  member him?  yes.  i aint seen him in SO Long i was like hey Grayson!  he rel glad to see me.  i put my card into the computer but Grayson say take that out girl and i will scan everything for you.  he did alls the work for me and no charge.  i sure love Grayson. AS a FRend.  god!

then go to Star my fave place.  Medhelp it took me just inside TWO HOUR to apply for this dope job at the community collige for esl prof  part time you know? and i know i never get this hip job but hey i do the foot work god do tha rest right ennay  heh????? !!!!!!!  yeah so  no disrespect.  na sayers get it nasayers ok yah

and um ... i worked hard on that app!  it pay 62-93 doller an hour this abt 3000x what i make now but only a few hours but hey thas all you needs!

and the scan transcrips from grayson go with that app

thn i call the lawyer she have me fax a hundred pges of papers to her and grayson gone home i got Josh the little nice shaved head dude he likes me he was all "did you change your hair"  i was like no .... it just exploded and grew sideways no i dint sy that but um he charged for the faxes and like 22 dollers!!!  there go my money oh well a good cause

then i attempt to walk the basin but it got aborted.  and then i try to go to a meeting but naw.  that aint work.

i had dinner.  

and the sunset over the basin for the minutes i was there was outtafckinsight!!!!!!!!!!!

and im tired.  ril tired.

OH! and i forgot to tell you, i squoze in 30 minutes about 3-4 pages of fiction today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  your a goddess, Meegy!  why ty!

i dont know that i will ever get used to sticking it out living here peacefully until this divorce goes thru.  like EVER

ohmyfreakingod power is mixing party rock over caya!!!!!!  no f*ckin way!!!  oh kurt, they dont mean nothing by it.  kurty doll.  im so sorry.  i blame myself for this mix kurt.  imsorry.  

but it is dope.  ohmigod im so sorry kc

gotta go, man!

do you love me?

becuz i love me.

sometimes.

shrug

i mean.  'you have shown this to us.  now you need to see it yourself.'

you are so right.  i think about that every day.

i love you, medhelp.

goodnite. its real cold out tonite mrp so be warm huni

kisskiss

Meegy Paw