smack

i feel slightly hellish.  i've been trying to stay out the house, but u know mh when i am back here and just tryin to chillax i get depressed and offish.  i mean.  its so hard being here.  i can hear him snoring loudly in the next room and i really want to kill him.  can i say that?  oh yeah i just cant say anything about the president.  right?  well i dont care i want to kill him. my hub that is.  ohhhhhhhhhhhhh lor that is beyond uncharitable.  thats a good screen name.  is that mean?  i didnt mean it that way but more sort of as like a tribute?  um.

yeah.

get it?

meegy!  stop it!

ahm sorry.


ohhhhhhh my

my weekend has been, well, totally very.  i mean.  which day was the huge depression?  thursday?  i think.  yeah then Friday i was all back in the saddle again ... and then yest was the same or worser.  cuz i started to do research and found out some stuff and i was just killed dead like .. you know.  i couldnt like to move i was just .. putty but not the silly kind the sad kind.  sad putty meegy.  very very much so.

so yeah.

its all aite but not good.  u know my friends standing me in good stead.  takin care o me.  real good.  but still it hard hard x for meegykins. yessirreebob.  b.o.b.  like outkast yeh yay!  their music has a certain energy i must begrudingly admit.

oh yite

no, i did not google that weird rapper yet.

i did download kendrick (f*ckin prob), and um ... that good ... (did you know its not 'that good fix' .. no its that good d*ck ... oh, my!  shocking!), and um this kroq song thats totally dope its called um ... they're not going to degrade us?  i think.  its bomb, and one more rap song ... what was it ... oh yeah problem like what.   ooh dopish all!

after i download the musik i go in my studio tho its cole and i danced.  i danced five songs i think.  it was good and i felt good doing it.

i walked on the beach with my fren in sta mon that was cole too but nis

saturday i went to a meeting i goto a lot i hang out with all the old guys.  oops!!!! did i say that!!! im sorry man!  i meant the old-er guys.  like, old-er.  like, not 20. you know?  oh gosh i aredy said it i cant take it back!!! lol  but um yeah i hang out with these guys i known them for soooooooooo long like when i first try to get clean in like 1920?  yes then.  and uh .. they remembers me.  and so i sit with them and they all have like a millin years clean they makes all kinds of jokes when ppl share and its very funi.  i think it is doing a lot for my recovery ha ha .. but serisless everyone there very supportive of me and that is well nis.

oh yeah i almost forgot to tell you i ran into my heroin connection at the meeting Sat!!! yeah!!!! so effin rot cuz you know i was so depress that day i was THINKIN a driving over to his hous and.  then i saw him there i was like NFW.  no f*ckin way.   yes way!!!!  like that.  i talked to him he was outside on the break i couldnt avoid it and then he was all im on my first day clean yeah i heard that from him before but i was rel nis and he go how long you have i sed 99 and he all hug me like hey you doing good and we aint talk about heroin and he was all ok and then later i just said bye .  i thought my fren was going to kill him.  like 187 here dude

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yi

and .. um.  what else

i hate it here.  i hate it here.  also, i hate it here.  i .  cannot ... wait.  to .. get.  my . own . place

i still dig Tyga

good evening medhelp

please wear a scarf.  its cold!!!!

brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

love,

Meegy