NUMBER1MOM's Profile
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NUMBER1MOM is
HAPPY SO FAR
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Female, 23, PASCAGOULA - MS
I LOVE TO READ BOOKS AND WATCH ADVENTURE MOVIES AND SHOW, SPEND TIME WITH MY BOYS. I AM OUTGOING, OUTSPOKEN, HONEST, AND EASY TO GET ALONG WITH.
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TIRED!!!!!
Mar 14, 2008 10:26AM
- 5 comments
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DEAR JOURNAL,
THIS MORNING I WOKE UP AND LOOKED AT MY SIGNIFICANT OTHER AND I REALIZED THAT I DON'T LOVE HIM LIKE I USE TO. WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 5 YEARS AND WE HAVE THREE BEAUTIFUL BOYS. THROUGHOUT OUR RELATIONSHIP, HE HAVE HAD 2 AFFAIRS. WE PUT THEM BEHIND US AND STARTED OVER. WHEN IT COMES TO HOUSE DUTIES, HE'S SO LAZY AND DON'T DO ANYHTING. HE'S BEEN LIKE THIS THROUGH OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP AND I BELIEVE THAT I HAVE HAD ENOUGH. I'M CONSTANTLY ASKING HIM TO HELP ME AROUND THE HOUSE AND I COMPLAIN EVERYDAY WHEN I COME HOME ABOUT MY HOUSE BEING MESSY. HE'S LAID OFF OF WORK NOW AND AND HE WATCHES TWO OF OUR BOYS WHILE I WORK. I LOVE IF BUT SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO BE BY MYSELF BECAUSE I'M DOING EVERYTHING BY MYSELF. I DON'T WANT TO THROW AWAY WHAT WE HAVE BUT I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH ENERGY TO WORK, COME HOME TO COOK, CLEAN, DEAL WITH THE BOYS WHILE HE PLAY ON THE PLAYSTATION OR WATCHING TV WITH HIS BOYS. I'M NEED SOME ADVICE.
THIS MORNING I WOKE UP AND LOOKED AT MY SIGNIFICANT OTHER AND I REALIZED THAT I DON'T LOVE HIM LIKE I USE TO. WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 5 YEARS AND WE HAVE THREE BEAUTIFUL BOYS. THROUGHOUT OUR RELATIONSHIP, HE HAVE HAD 2 AFFAIRS. WE PUT THEM BEHIND US AND STARTED OVER. WHEN IT COMES TO HOUSE DUTIES, HE'S SO LAZY AND DON'T DO ANYHTING. HE'S BEEN LIKE THIS THROUGH OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP AND I BELIEVE THAT I HAVE HAD ENOUGH. I'M CONSTANTLY ASKING HIM TO HELP ME AROUND THE HOUSE AND I COMPLAIN EVERYDAY WHEN I COME HOME ABOUT MY HOUSE BEING MESSY. HE'S LAID OFF OF WORK NOW AND AND HE WATCHES TWO OF OUR BOYS WHILE I WORK. I LOVE IF BUT SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO BE BY MYSELF BECAUSE I'M DOING EVERYTHING BY MYSELF. I DON'T WANT TO THROW AWAY WHAT WE HAVE BUT I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH ENERGY TO WORK, COME HOME TO COOK, CLEAN, DEAL WITH THE BOYS WHILE HE PLAY ON THE PLAYSTATION OR WATCHING TV WITH HIS BOYS. I'M NEED SOME ADVICE.
by ursula27, Mar 14, 2008 10:39AM
i had the same problem, my common law husband of ten years, yeah i know we started young when i was just fifteen, well anyways, we have two daughters, 6 and 9, he was there for me and the girls, he cleaned and cooked for a while when i first was diagnosed with lupus, then he started drifting into this mood of not being wanted or something, he started drinking, first behind my back, then right in front of me, this was cauing me stress and iterferring with my family. i finally told him we had to seperate, he moved out, i was a lot pain last year, not knowing what was wrong, we just taught it was a pulus flare, i ended up catching double pneumonia and had a swollen gland under my armpit the size of a grapefruit, i was in the hospital for three weeks, should of been longer but i had to discharge myself because this was drinking during schoool hours and i was scared for my daugthers. i am working and am able to support myself, its just that it gets hard, i need someone to be there for my girls and help me around the house. so my question is should i allow thier dad to come and visit and try help or will it make it worse? write back.
by NUMBER1MOM, Mar 14, 2008 11:45AM
YOU SHOULD LET HIM VISIT HIS DAUGHTERS BECAUSE THE PROBLEM YOU TWO HAVE DOES NOT HAVE ANYHTHING TO DO WITH THE GIRLS. YOU CAN SET SOME STANDARDS ABOUT HIS VISITATION THOUGH. LET HIM KNOW, THAT YOU WANT HIM TO BE THERE FOR HIS DAUGHTER BUT ALSO LET HIM KNOW THAT HE HAVE TO BE SOBER WHEN HE IS AROUND THEM. ALSO LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU WILL NOT LET HIM COME AROUND IF HE IS DRUNK. ASK HIM HOW WOULD HE FEEL IF THE TABLE WAS TURN. LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU DO NEED HELP BUT ONLY WHEN HE'S SOBER. LET HIM KNOW WHAT HE'LL BE MISSING OUT ON IF HE CONTINUE TO GET DRUNK. I MEAN EVERYONE IS HAVING PROBLEMS BUT MAYBE COUNSELING WILL HELP FOR YOU GUYS. I SORRY ABOUT YOUR ILLNESS. I NEED SOME ADVICE ON MY SITUATION ON THE PREVIOUS POST. CAN YOU HELP ME?
by Charlie429, Mar 19, 2008 09:12AM
I feel the same way
I take meds. do you
I take meds. do you
by Ktz40, Mar 22, 2008 08:50AM
You need to sit him down and seriuosly tell him how greatly appreciated his help is & how much happier you both would be if you didnt have to come home and stress about taking care of everything else too..so not fair. He needs a firm talking too. As you are only 23, my guess is he is young also. Its great that he is helping out with the kids, he should ! Hes not working, so natually that is what he should do. The housework and cooking should also be taken care of. I know staying home with two kids can be a constant cleaning effort, does he do a little, but gets tired by days end?? Or nothing at all?
Honestly if it cant be corrected now, this issue you have, it will possibly always remain the same.
Honestly if it cant be corrected now, this issue you have, it will possibly always remain the same.
by skydove, Apr 02, 2008 08:54AM
Omg, I would leave.. It's his house and his kids too.. why do you have to do it all.. and if you're gonna do it all then why not do it on your own.. your kids will do their chores.. and there won't be that extra mess every day.. I know no one wants to be alone.. and raise kids...But hell no.. i would not put up with a bump on a log who won't take on some cleaning of his own house with out me bitching..Girlfriend.. look up codependacy or The doormatt wife.. look on amazon for books .. self help.. just type in how you feel and a amazon will find a book that relates. you can google the same way.. Help yourself.. stop tryin to fix him.. The only thing we can control is our action and reactions in life.. You need support.. go get it!
HUGS and Love
SkyDove
HUGS and Love
SkyDove
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