All Journal Entries Journals
Previous | Next

Rough Day- Need to change and deal.

Apr 13, 2013 - 1 comments
Tags:

rough day

,

changes

,

stress

,

Period

,

needs

,

deal



I woke up in an absolutely dandy mood, but then when I had had a shower and got ready for some reason the other half got set off, and to my almost disbelief expressed how he thought the relationship was going, which in my eyes was not how I believed it was going. He expressed how he thought I was getting boring, moody and horrible. How he thought I had nasty swipes and put him down. Myself I haven't realised this happening myself but I can in fact see where his coming from. At the time I didn't know what to say or how to respond, or even make him feel better or reassure him, which in hind sight is the wrong thing, but it couldn't be helped. Now after time to reflect I can totally see his point, and even though I have no excuse for the behavior that makes him feel that way, I personally believe it's due to a lot of stress on my behalf, making me behave in ways I wouldn't normally. It all started when I found out about my Auntie having terminal cancer, which obviously is very stressful to any member of the family, and even though I have, or at least seemed to have moved past the most grieving part of things, and have settled into the news, it's obviously still a stressful time for me. Then there's the fact that I feel like I'm stuck in a dead end part time job, that only pays me enough to scrap through and nothing else. which over time has had a very gradual stress build up for me, but I'm hoping to resolve this by looking at going to uni for midwifery, which can take me into an actual career. Then there's the fact that I miss my female friends and I'm craving it. friends are benificial to my relationship too, because I can get things out and they don't clench up and explode in the actual relationship, so having friends straight off the bat de-sensitizes stress and bad behavior within the relationship itself. But because I keep trying to get in touch with friends and have no luck, I'm not getting this release and I'm getting frustrated which is in return causing a stress and uptight atmosphere. And just to top it all off I've had my first period in ages, and all the hormone have come rushing back, causing frustration and irritability. Ideally I need advice and support on the best thing to do, and how to better manage myself.

Mood Tracker
Comments
Post a Comment
4926212_tn?1361203474
by peachrobidoux, Apr 18, 2013
Conversations like that truly suck. My husband has been shouting at me because I am depressed and having physical ailments (due to stress). The stress is mainly because he has been emotionally abusive and insulting. I mean, do you REALLY need to keep pointing out that your wife is fat???
Don't be blaming yourself for any of this, sister. It's not your fault that you're going through a rough time. And someone who really cares about you wouldn't be telling you that you are boring, moody, and horrible. Seems to me that he's a bit horrible right now. Some people can be so callous.
Just remind yourself that despite the stress and yucky stuff happening, you are a beautiful, intelligent, and special person. And the world needs more amazing midwives. I hope that works out for you.
Hold your head up, Mama! It'll work out.

Post a Comment