Destiny4's Profile
Mood:
Destiny4 is
hoping things look up VERY SOON
About Me:
Female, 27, DFW - TX
I am 27 years old married to the man of my dreams for almost 10 years. We have 4 wonderful children, 9,7,5,3 years old. I have been diagnosed with chronic pain since well i dont even know exactly how long. I am on here to try and get some suport in helping me get off...
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Who am I?
Mar 27, 2008 01:00PM
- 0 comments
I dont know when i became who i am but i know that i am not "me". I wish i was who i used to be because i dont really like the person i am right now i dont like how i feel and i know it is mostly cause of the pain pill withdrawls but there is more to it.
when i started taking pain pills i stopped taking the prozac as i felt good on the pain pills, however now that i am not taking pain pills my depression is swirling into a place i dont like to be. I feel as if i cant get up from where i am at. It is like i am in this nightmare and i am going to wake up and everything wil be good again.
I dont know where to go or what to do, it is like i am just "here" physically mentally i have no ******* clue where i am. I dont even know how to verbalize the thoughts and fears that flood my head at this point. I think if i just take a pain pill i will feel good again. but then i realize yes i will feel good but again i wont be me. I need to be ME my family needs me to be ME again. but who is that? who am i?
I am barely functioning, simple tasks have become imposible to me and i dont understand why. I know the detox is taking a toll on me and i am doing everything i can to stay with it. It is REALLY hard sometimes thoe.
I know you guys are there for me even thoe i dont take you up on it cause im not even really here for me but knowing you are means soooo much to me.
Gotta go back to work I am on lunch and have to go back to work.
Des
I dont know when i became who i am but i know that i am not "me". I wish i was who i used to be because i dont really like the person i am right now i dont like how i feel and i know it is mostly cause of the pain pill withdrawls but there is more to it.
when i started taking pain pills i stopped taking the prozac as i felt good on the pain pills, however now that i am not taking pain pills my depression is swirling into a place i dont like to be. I feel as if i cant get up from where i am at. It is like i am in this nightmare and i am going to wake up and everything wil be good again.
I dont know where to go or what to do, it is like i am just "here" physically mentally i have no ******* clue where i am. I dont even know how to verbalize the thoughts and fears that flood my head at this point. I think if i just take a pain pill i will feel good again. but then i realize yes i will feel good but again i wont be me. I need to be ME my family needs me to be ME again. but who is that? who am i?
I am barely functioning, simple tasks have become imposible to me and i dont understand why. I know the detox is taking a toll on me and i am doing everything i can to stay with it. It is REALLY hard sometimes thoe.
I know you guys are there for me even thoe i dont take you up on it cause im not even really here for me but knowing you are means soooo much to me.
Gotta go back to work I am on lunch and have to go back to work.
Des