My Story from the begining

18 years ago I was given a tylenol 3.. It changed my life that day!  I had a c-section and alot of pain so they gave me the #3s .. well ..when they ran out i was fine,  for a bit,  then I decided i wanted to feel good again..I needed some more of those pills. So i went to my doctors and told him about my bad knees..tada.. i had a script for tylenol 3..Things were good life was good .. for about 8years. Then I had surgery on my carpal tunnel.. and I met vicoden.. Wow.. Way better! Life was great things were Great.. I had a few more surgerys and had to be on the vicoden for about 2years.. Once i really started abusing the vic's I went doctor shopping and found lorecett . I was in heaven..  Then my sister got Oxy's and the buzz got better.. at first i was ****** up alot.. falling asleep with ciggerettes burning ****.. I even burnt the remote controler one day... Then my sister introduced me to morphine ir's which by that time didn't do much for me.. I just wanted the lorcett... which i did pretty good on for about 6 months ... then my doctor made me do a **** test and I was positive for weed..They wouldn't give me my script and so i went doctor shopping ... I thought well lets see if we can get away with just telling them i'm on percocet 10/325. I dressed the part.. nothing grubby .. i looked like a teacher... and tada... i got my percocet ...I would be on percocet for the next 8years with oxy's 40mlg about 50 a month ... I was so high.. and making some ****** up decisions.. I started partyin with my 16year old daughter ... giving her pills .. xanx.. which i had been on from the begining...and a percocet here and there... I had no idea my sister was getting her addicted to oxy's too.. and her husband.. I get it now.. she didn't want to be ****** up alone...Then I was homeless.. and not getting as much oxy's so i went heavy into weed and drinking while taking my percocet  so i wouldn't run out.. then i met this guy who had morphine and I was all set... Then my doctor percribed me valume 10mlg for muscle spasms.. which i do really get.. but not like i was telling him.. He felt bad for me.. Then i met the man I'm engaged to .. I just fell in Love.. and my spirit was tryin to talk to me and get me to clean up my pill usin.. so i conviced myself i could manage my percocet.. I started breaking the 10 into 5's and made my script twice as much.. I tried to make myself believe that for almost a year.. and then i started taking whole ones again.. i think it's because my sister was coming around and i was getting heavy back into the oxy's and I didn't want her to think I couldn't handle what she gave me so i started goin to her dealer to get morphine 60mlgs  I was spending about 180.00 every 5days.. and i really started to not like myself.. and I told my man i had a problem and i needed to go to NA ... I had been working with this girl who was 4years sober through AA and she said she would go with me to my first meeting.. I went in and sat with a small group  I'll be back to finish this story.. sorrry