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HAPPY

May 29, 2013 - 2 comments
Tags:

happy

,

withdrawal

,

Pain

,

Anxiety

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bowel

,

Depression

,

Health

,

Baby

,

Heart

,

Hope

,

head

,

relief

,

natural health

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herbs and their medicinal uses

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prayer works

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believe in yourself

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trusting god always!



I feel happy, 3 days now. Over the moon yesterday!  My 2nd Daughter had her baby girl! Both well. Baby so perfect & beautiful. Praise God! I have moments of anxiety, but instead of thinking 'pills' to take, I think 'prayer'. It works! I pray, give thanks because I fully believe He will heal me. I go about my chores, watch TV or read, (occupy my mind somehow, anyway) & about 10 mins later I realize I no longer have the 'fright' feelings in my tummy & heart. Mind is clear & I feel refreshed, full of gratitude, just calm & happy!  Weaning off valium & zopiclone is going well. Have less some days, but know I should take as prescribed as I don't want to prolong the weaning period. Hate taking these meds. They dampen my spirit, make me feel sick, & I don't need them, but because I'm addicted, know I have to taper them to finally get off them. I'm still incredulous that my psych would prescribe Olanzapine for me, to help withdrawal symptoms while weaning. Thank God I researched it first before taking any. THERE IS NO WAY I WOULD TAKE THIS POISON! I don't know where her head is. She told me to take 2 zopiclone a day, as I was on 2 and a 1/2, & this is the one I had been struggling to have less of, but she only wrote 1 daily on the script she gave me. ??? Anyway, trying to stick to 1, & it was a bit of a struggle at first, but not anymore & I will get through. It no longer calms me like it once did. Maybe because I'm no longer full of anxiety, so waste of time even taking it, but once again, it's one that has to be tapered. Oh boy! NO MORE MEDS FOR ME! Good 'ol Mother Nature's foods, remedies are the greatest. MAGIC!  Tummy pain nearly all gone, excepet for about 10 mins upon sitting up when I wake in the morning, but this could be due to the bowel prolapse. Seeing colorectal surgeon tomorrow. Hope to get prolapse fixed soon. I believe my prayers for healing, taking herbs specific for bowel probs, &the op I had where they pumped air into my intestines, 'unkinked' maybe a twist or something, idk, but been able to eat anything I want, especially MEAT again ever since. PRAISE THE LORD! My health suffered from malnutrition for 5 mths, but am slowly recovering. I'm glowing again, my daughters tell me. I want to stop seeing this psych. I tried to ask her last appt, if she could write a letter to my GP, to oversee my weaning plan. She goes & prescribes that Olanzapine or Zyprexa, & wants to see me on 17th June. I'm going to tell her straight. I cannot afford the $60 each appt. My GP said she has to write a letter to her, giving her permission to oversee my weaning off meds plan. It's true. We're struggling financially, & to have to fork out $60 for what? More meds? No thanks! She has stuffed me up right from the beginning. The object of my referral to her was to get me off valium. Instead, because I did have severe anxiety/depression at the time, she put me on 2 more. Ah, posted all this before, so won't re-post it. She also put me on zopiclone saying it's non-addictive, as I told her I want nothing addictive. Turns out it is highly addictive.  I'm only repeating myself here, so won't go on about that. Bottom line is, she's messed me up, but not entirely her fault, as I was the one who trusted her & took the meds, but NOT THIS NEW ONE. OK, I've vented again, haha! Time for a cuppa herb tea. (Boy, typing this is much easier than writing all this down in my diary!) I will add, that when you're in full-blown anxiety and or depression, it is very hard to believe in God, in His healing. I know. I was sceptical back then too. It's easy to pray, but VERY HARD to BELIEVE! I had to persevere, and miraculous healing did begin to happen. I struggled, but pressed on, forced myself to research natural foods to help balance the neurotransmitters in the brain, kept my mind occupied, even just playing games on facebook. It's so easy to wallow in self-pity, as you don't understand why this has happened to you. It's such a deep, dark place, & the anxiety overtakes your whole mind & & body, which can cause major depression. It's human nature, to be sorry for yourself, but you can get up & do something about it, with what little strength you have left. Really wanting to get off meds is the 2st step, & it's not easy, but neither is staying addicted easy. It's pure HELL!. Just start with a simple prayer. It plants a seed of hope!  I'm still amazed at how my life has turned around since I saw how addicted & miserable I was & where I was headed (Down the suicidal path). This site was the beginning, then my renewed faith in God soon followed. I would never have believed or imagined that I could feel this happy again, despite arthritis pain. (Praying on that now, but have to yet fully believe, but I'm only a 'beginner' at all this faith business, haha, though the fact that my tummy pains have been healed, should make me see that prayer works! I was led to a Chinese Herbalist through 'coincidence' (which I don't really believe there's such thing as coincidence, anymore). I believe God sends us people that can help! These natural herbs played a part in my healing, as well as my trust in God. I used to sing a song I know, and sometimes still do:-
"LORD, HELP ME WALK ANOTHER MILE, JUST ONE MORE MILE,
I'M TIRED OF WALKING ALL ALONE,
LORD, HELP ME SMILE, ANOTHER SMILE, JUST ONE MORE SMILE,
I KNOW, I JUST CAN'T MAKE IT, ON MY OWN
I NEVER THOUGHT I NEEDED HELP BEFORE,
I THOUGHT THAT I COULD DO THINGS, BY MYSELF,
NOW I KNOW I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE,
WITH A HUMBLE HEART
ON BENDED KNEE,
I'M BEGGIN' YOU PLEASE -
HELP ME!"

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by L_Lady, May 29, 2013
Never heard that song before,  but I like it :)  so glad you're on the road to recovery.   God can provide strength you won't find anywhere else.  But I don't have to tell u that :)

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by shugalug, May 29, 2013
Thank you L_Lady.  It's a song that Kris Kristofferson wrote & sang. Just beautiful! Yes, it's a wonderful new journey, & I'm NEVER going back! I may have slip-ups, but will deal with it if & when that happens, (I'm still only human, after all), & get right back up. Yes, it's only by God's Grace that I'm being healed. So glad you're a believer too!
God Bless.

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