Iv lost my head in the shed!!!!

I have tried so many ways today to get my results read, still no joy, yet it seems, Im going to be sat looking at the results forever?? I wish I knew what they said?????????? its so frustrating, eery time I see kevs eyes looking at me, thinking and wondering, what is in store for us?? kevs back probs are worsening, he is having promblems holding things, dropping stuff, pins and needles!!! it does not help his bipolar when we get all this news, with no understanding of anything, my admin is piling up, i cant face it, writing about all of my feelings since the accident? positivity is what i need a bucketful of, the word, DEGENERATIVE, DEGENERATIVE....... is repeating over and over, i have another headache brewing, they terrify me? i have a huge pain thresh hold, also my body seems to be able to take huge doses of medication, but nothing helps the scorching white poker, that feels like is being  poked thru my left eye!!! my eye has started turning in, plus i keep getting moments where, it feels like vertigo, but its as if something moves in my head behind my left eye?? the headaches and syptoms are getting worse, my neck feels like it needs supporting, to flop it on the pillow is such a relief!!! i have numbness down my lft side from mid back to behind my left knee? the coclusion said degenerative cervical and lumbar spine???????????? but what does that mean? im housebound, at 38 yrs old, i cant believe receiveing the mri results have affected me so much?????? my back hurts constantly? will surgery better m life?? anybody please talk to me, im feeling so alone in a world full of people??