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Day 98 since my last Methadone.
May 21, 2009 06:40PM
- 3 comments
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Well my friends here I am now 98 days out from taking off the liquid handcuffs!! It seems such a long time ago but then I get a small subtle reminder that this drug hasn't totally 'loosed' it's grip on my mind and body. It blows my mind that after over 3 months being off of it I still experience W/Ds but nowhere near as major as it was in the first month. I have extreme fatigue and constant yawning with my right eye constantly tearing up. As for the fatigue that could also because I'm transitioning back into to my job and I know that is sucking the life out of me, it's the first time I've worked without Methadone in over two years.
All I can about this drug is that to me it is 'HORRIBLE'. I know many have seen Methadone as a life saver and that's how I felt for a while also. I am by no means judging anyone who takes it. Now I'm off it, I can truly see what kind of a person it made me and the 'constant brain fog' I was in every day. It was a real battle for me to stop taking it, it took me three attempts to finally beat it, albeit with the little reminders that I'm still getting at 98 days. It was an intimidating place for me to be, always thinking I could stop it whenever I needed to, then finding out I couldn't. The fear and anxiety of the failed attempts at stopping it, the emotions of thinking I was addicted, but thankfully coming to the realization that it was a physical dependency to help treat my chronic condition. I can honestly say I never abused it, never taking more than the prescribed dose.
I just think that Dr's should have a bigger responsibilty to their patients to fully explain what these drugs do to us. That being said, we as patients also have a responsibilty to ourselves to do our own research before putting any substance into our body. I'm starting the Fentanyl patch next week and have really appreciated the advice I have received on this website.
I cringe when I read posts about people who are considering taking Methadone for pain relief. After my research I firmly believe there are many better other options out there. I cannot speak to it's use to combat heroin addiction although many feel it has saved their lifes.
So I move on one day at a time, enjoying and cherishing the good days(less pain) that I am blessed with having. Being more thankful for the positive things in my life. And always remembering that in the times when I'm struggling or having a bad day if you will, that there is always someone out there with much bigger problems than me.
All I can about this drug is that to me it is 'HORRIBLE'. I know many have seen Methadone as a life saver and that's how I felt for a while also. I am by no means judging anyone who takes it. Now I'm off it, I can truly see what kind of a person it made me and the 'constant brain fog' I was in every day. It was a real battle for me to stop taking it, it took me three attempts to finally beat it, albeit with the little reminders that I'm still getting at 98 days. It was an intimidating place for me to be, always thinking I could stop it whenever I needed to, then finding out I couldn't. The fear and anxiety of the failed attempts at stopping it, the emotions of thinking I was addicted, but thankfully coming to the realization that it was a physical dependency to help treat my chronic condition. I can honestly say I never abused it, never taking more than the prescribed dose.
I just think that Dr's should have a bigger responsibilty to their patients to fully explain what these drugs do to us. That being said, we as patients also have a responsibilty to ourselves to do our own research before putting any substance into our body. I'm starting the Fentanyl patch next week and have really appreciated the advice I have received on this website.
I cringe when I read posts about people who are considering taking Methadone for pain relief. After my research I firmly believe there are many better other options out there. I cannot speak to it's use to combat heroin addiction although many feel it has saved their lifes.
So I move on one day at a time, enjoying and cherishing the good days(less pain) that I am blessed with having. Being more thankful for the positive things in my life. And always remembering that in the times when I'm struggling or having a bad day if you will, that there is always someone out there with much bigger problems than me.
Congratulations for your progress in recovery! My son struggled with a methadone addiction for several years, the last two of them at home, so I appreciate what you have been through. He was up to 2-300 mg daily, I believe, and I don't think he realized fully what a terrible hold it had on him until the last 6 months, when he went through a cycle of wthdrawals and ODs, the last one fatal a month ago today.
I am so so sorry for the loss of your son to this drug. I can't even begin to imagine how you must feel. I know Methadones has caused MANY deaths, sometimes on it's own but more often in combination with a benzo of some kind. It's the long half life of Methadone that gets you into trouble. It can be anywhere from 24 hours to 96 hours.
You are brave to come on here and share this tragedy. Perhaps through the loss of your son, a life may be saved through that hard hard lesson.
Best regards.
Brian.
You are brave to come on here and share this tragedy. Perhaps through the loss of your son, a life may be saved through that hard hard lesson.
Best regards.
Brian.
I to have quit methodone after 8yrs. I was up to 112mgs. & weened myself down over a 7mos. period to 13mgs. & then quit The first 4days were not to bad, but day 5 to date which has been 5wks thursday I have suffered miserbly. I have just this past week felt a little better, but still suffer from fatigue, can't sleep without sleeping aids, hot baths ect. I still have headaches once in awhile & cannot believe how difficult this journey has been. I never imagined it would be this hard, becase no one tells you how bad this medication is to get off of. A friend of mine told me about a homopathic dr. who I spoke to over the phone about trying to get well quicker & she mentioned the fact that the residue can stay in your cells for years, & the thought of that makes me freak out. Have any of you ever heard of taking homopathic remedies to help cleanse the body & get your energy back?
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