Officially over, which is funny cause only after it ended did I realize it had happened, and that I hadn't realized it beacause of my pathetically pathetic libito (right?), which sprung back today. Like I said, I missed him a lot. I woke up late and showered and shaved all and moisterized and hell if I didn't actually feel girly. But for my belly ring is bleeding and I had ice cream for breakfast. I ate so much. ANTM is doing under 5' 7" models for season 13. That excites me, even though I'm too young, can't model, ugly, and fat. Just the thought, that it could happen. Amazing. My guinea pig is squeaking. He has an attitude problem, and it frusterates me that I always feed him at the same time every night, because he can tell time. My fish died a few days ago. It's still floating in its bowl though. I'm sorry, little fishy. Why can't I just let go of things? I should be in bed. Why can't I ever drag myself upstairs ontime? My shorts are very loose, which I find horribly missleading, since I gained weight. I must have. Don't think I'm trying to be modest or some ****, I've been pigging out the last few days. But you can see straight down them. And something funny about that is, I woke up this morning and went to find underwear and was just like, haha world, I don't think I'll wear any underwear today! So I didn't. Nor did my clothes match. I am honestly thinking about wearing shorts to school tomarrow though. A scary thing. I have a gyno appointment tomarrow. Also scary, even though it's only for a renewal of birth control. A good thing, for us sex addicts. No, I'm kidding. But it's a cute thought. I hate it down here, I desperately wish I was on a proper antipsychotic. Or any, for that matter. Why am I so scared. Why can't I just be normal. Why don't my eyes, brain, ANYTHING work properly. Oh yeah, speaking of eyes, my right eye looks high as a kite and stings like a *****. Why, do you ask? Because SOMEBODY HAS HORRIBLE HORRIBLE AIM. And thinks it's funny. I need to clean up some ferret poop. My hair looks hideous. Shei wanted to hang out today. Why didn't she call yesterday? I would have liked to hang out with her. Psh.