All Journal Entries Journals
Previous | Next

Tramadol & Ultram Recovery Room #61

Dec 26, 2013 - 235 comments
Tags:

tramadol

,

ultram

,

Recovery

,

Love

,

Healing

,

support



Hello Tramadol Warriors!

Welcome to Part 61!

Please make yourself comfortable.  It's a bumpy ride.  But I promise you have come to the right place if you want to get off Tramadol.  Forever.  

This is a place to find support and give support from those who really know what it is like.

Understanding is essential!

You can do this.  


And yes. Eventually you will heal!



Love and Healing,
Emily

Comments
Post a Comment
1226971_tn?1352320406
by coosa1978, Dec 27, 2013
I haven't checked in for some time, but it's great to see the board is still home to many looking for help.  Never thought I would have made it this far, but eventually one day I just wasn't thinking about the little white devils and how much I needed them or wish I had them.

Kudos to everyone that is breaking the habit...you can do it!  One day at a time :)

7119471_tn?1388265638
by 1footfwrd, Dec 28, 2013
I triied tramadol withdrawal cold turkey once after a surgery and will never put myself through it again. I have gotten a TENS unit, and since I am finding relief from it, I want to try it with no tramadol. I ran out of tramadol two days early, started through withdrawal, fended it off a little with imodium (reasonable amoutns, not 20 sheesh.) and stuff. But I said to myself, when I get the tramadol, I am going to taper. So. . .for four days I took my regular number, which was three in the a.m. and three mid-afternoon. I was able to jump down to four comfortably and am at that amount the first day. One every four hours is how I am proceeding. Two pills so far and I'm fine. I will stay on these four for four days, and then go down by half till I am at three. When I get to three, if I can remain there comfortably for four days, I plan to start tapering by a quarter pill every four days. I will tell you if I have to vary this and keep you apprised of my progress. I am pretty determined, because I really think if I can do something alternative about my pain I won't want the pills anymore. What happens is I end up with nausea every morning, craving the pill right away. I hate that feeling, waking up nauseated and needing a pill. Ugh. Wish me success, and I wish it for everyone here, too. I am making sure to take my daily supplements and all, maybe will help my discomfort when I get to the last jump off a quarter pill. Here goes. ....!

7119471_tn?1388265638
by 1footfwrd, Dec 29, 2013
Taking just the four pills yesterday was fine. I had a little achies but took some tylenol and was okay without taking more tramadol.

I know this will get harder when I cut way down. I want to thank Emily for continuing this board so long after her withdrawal. I will not want to even be thinking about pills by then. It took me a long time and reading many threads before I found this one.

I don't think tramadol is evil like some people have posted. It got me through my pain without the "high" feeling. I just have found alternative pain relief,. I see no reason to remain dependent and every reason to go off.

7119471_tn?1388265638
by 1footfwrd, Dec 29, 2013
Well, everyone seems to be off having their holidays. But I'll keep posting.

Negatives: took a long time to get to sleep last night. Didn't want to take more than one dihenhydramine.

Positives: I'm able to pooh after those two days I was taking 2 imodium every four daytime hours. I wasn't hurting from the constipation, but am glad things are back to processing. Urination is also freer the fewer tramadol you take. Hope I'm not being gross. It's less icky than some stuff on some other forums I just read, blech.

599071_tn?1300072302
by madtram, Dec 29, 2013
Hi Emily, just stopping by to send you blessings for 2014 & thank you for providing this great space which saw me through some tough times.

Keep on battling tramadol warriors, the goal is so worth it.

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Dec 29, 2013
Hi MadTram!  Blessings back Sweetheart.  :)

1footforward I'm glad to hear you are on the road to recovery.  :)

Love you guys ... don't worry.  You'll get to 100% recovered I promise.  

Avatar_f_tn
by Kylie4501, Dec 29, 2013
Hey everyone,

I am 69 days clean!!! I am very proud of myself!!

Ever since I quit tramadol, my eyes have been red and irritated. I have never had problems before. I assumed it was the toxins coming out of my body, but it has been 69 days. When will it go away? Is this common with Tramadol detox or should I go see an eye doc? It is VERY annoying!!

7119471_tn?1388265638
by 1footfwrd, Dec 30, 2013
Kylie: congratulations! I would go to the eye doctor about your eyes. I doubt it has to do with the tramadol. I've been reading and reading on these forums, and nobody has mentioned that. It didn't happen to me when I did a cold turkey a long time ago. Sometimes they run during withdrawal, but not that long afterward. Maybe it's an allergy, but you should check it out.

7119471_tn?1388265638
by 1footfwrd, Dec 30, 2013
On my third day having stepped down to four a day and doing fine. I hope this method saves me the worst of the horrid physical stuff. We shall see.

Avatar_n_tn
by caretown, Dec 30, 2013
2 weeks down....a lifetime to go. What's PAWS?  (Ok - I know I need to get off my butt and google it. Sometimes I think researching too much starts making me think things are worse then they are....know what I mean? ) I'm guessing PAWS is the massive boredom, nervous/anxious, feeling like someone sucked the color from your life. Like debbie downer from Saturday Night Live.

It's like I am like a child relearning how to do everything without the babydolls. Grocery shopping/working out/work/nights to myself (those are the hard ones). Without the dolls I have to push myself to get things done - with the dolls I had to push myself to stay focused to get things done( I was sooo scatterbrained!!). Its hard both ways - but without the trams I'm on a better path, with them things were just going down hill (harder to focus, harder to succeed, harder to keep my promises) at least I know things are going to get better.  Time to deal with things like a normal functioning human. <-- Why does that sound so hard?

I started talking to my family again last week. I was so ashamed of what I had become (they didn't/don't know) that I avoided them at all costs - now I'm calling them. Going to be a good daughter/mother/friend/partner.

Good luck all. Let's do this, we can do it....I can do it.










1059641_tn?1277525976
by forget_me_not, Dec 30, 2013
Hi Emily, MadTram and others… just wanted to stop in and say "Thank you" to Emily for continuing this beautiful place of healing, and to let everyone know that YES, you CAN get free from the tramadevil, and you will!  With support, determination, and faith that things will get better, you will.  Believe all of us who have gone down the same road you are on.  It does get better, and you will be just fine.

Stay strong, come here and ask for help when you need it, and never lose sight of your goal…freedom and life.

love and blessings,
~forget_me_not (former tramadol prisoner)

1059641_tn?1277525976
by forget_me_not, Dec 30, 2013
Caretown, you pretty much nailed PAWS.  It is complicated and apparently doesn't affect everyone, but for some of us, it's an SOB.  Low- to mid-level depression, general feelings of emptiness and strangeness, temper flares, memory problems, inability to cope with emotions. These symptoms vary, and not everyone experiences them.  For many people, it's best described as "the whispers" - the memory, perhaps, or some aspect of the habitual use of the drug (or whatever one is addicted to).  And it can cause slips, so it's best to beware.  You might experience some depression as your brain and body readjust and find equilibrium after being bombarded for so long with such a powerful SSNRI drug.  You may feel fatigue out of nowhere, but it won't last long.  You may even have memory lapses that frighten you.  Take heart…many of us have been through the same thing.  It will end, and you will be stronger and better.  Just be prepared, so that if it does happen, it doesn't scare you back to the poison.

Take care, and many blessings to you as you reclaim yourself.
~fmn

Avatar_f_tn
by sad_lou, Jan 01, 2014
I have only stumbled across these posts 24hrs ago. I went cold turkey 23 days ago from tramadol. I thought once the irritable, heavy leg symptoms subsided,  that was me off the evil drugs! I have the most uncontrollable rages, lack of enthusiasm, depressed days :-( I knew that there must be something wrong. I was beginning to accept that maybe I am just a miserable, moody horrible person! My partner has left twice. I have no interest in my childrens activities. I can't remember the last time I actually enjoyed anything... I am scared of whats still to come

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Jan 01, 2014
Sad Lou welcome ... how much tramadol were you taking and for how long?  Your symptoms sound very normal, the withdrawal is brutal.


ForgetMeNot A super big hug for you Hon!

Everyone else you fight on ok?  Don't let tramadol be your master.  

Love and Healing,
Em

Avatar_f_tn
by sad_lou, Jan 01, 2014
I was diagnosed with a herniated disc in April, so about 8 months. I was taking 8 50mg tablets a day. And I gradually got them down to 2, then 1, now none. What I am most scared of is this horrid rage that seems to come from nowhere! I like many, have no desire to even leave the house. I don't dress nice or feel particularly nice. My partner says that I am just trying to find something to blame my moods on... but now, after reading through your journals. I am convinced its the dreaded pills

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Jan 01, 2014
The rage is coming from the activation of the Limbic System.  A deep primitive part of our brains regulate rage, hunger, scent ...  You can use fragrance to interrupt it.  Epsom salt baths to detox.  b-12 sublingual tablets to stabilize mood and keep that burnout feeling away.  Honey to stabilize and give you energy.

I have two herniated discs and S1 neuropathy from it.  It's awful, but over time some heal up nicely.

Your partner is mistaken, tramadol withdrawal causes serious mood disorders.

I hope you have found a few things that help ease these effects.  

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Jan 01, 2014
http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=73599

This is a good thread on PAWS, along with suggestions to help ease it.  I agree with most of what this says ... helpful!

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jan 03, 2014
For those of you worried about PAWS.... the depression, the anxiety, lack of enthusiasm, lack of energy, rage, emotions, depersonalization, nerve pains, weird feelings on the body, hopelessness, the idea it will never end, suicide ideation etc... It DOES get better.  maybe not overnight, but slowly,one by one, things ease up.  I remember feeling pretty hopeless at 6 months, then in the next few months, things started getting easier. I really believed I was the one person who was going to be stuck in the badness... the one who never recovered.  Permanently broken.  I never thought I would be able to come on here and say I was better.

You have to give it time, especially if you took a high amount or for a long time.  Your brain is trying to make new connections around the "damage".  Think of people recovering from a stroke or physical injury.  They have to have rehab.  Essentially, this is where we are.. in rehabilitation.. and in rehab you have to stick with it or it doesn't work.  Your brain is very powerful.  It wants to work right.

One thing that has really helped my cognition is puzzle games.. or number games.  Or brain exercises on Lumosity.  Also, word puzzles, crosswords an the like.  I would try a variety.  The brain loves learning new tasks and taking on challenges.  The brain wants to work.  It get's very bored.

Good luck!  I'm almost at 10 months!  I am so happy!

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jan 03, 2014
Oh, @Kylie4501... the eyes!  

Yes, I started having eye issues when I started my taper.

I have had dry burning eyes.  I've never had to use eye drops in my life, but I have had to up until recently.  I was having issues with blurry vision when I would have my withdrawal flashbacks, but that's not happening much anymore.

Also, I am having issues with seeing flashes in the corners of my eyes when they are closed and I look back and forth.  I know there are conditions that can cause this, I never had issues until I started tapering last January.  It goes away if I have a couple of drinks.  Weird.

I did read somewhere that antidepressant withdrawals can cause eye issues like the ones I have described.  I really feel that is the nasty part of this drug withdrawal... the SNRI.

Nonetheless, I am going to see the eye Dr soon.

5787980_tn?1397520009
by cali_soleil, Jan 03, 2014
Kylie and allinblack-

I see "flashes" or "sparks" in the corner of my eyes. Mostly at night. Not always. It seems to come and go. But no pain with it. My eyes are red and dry but nothing I can't handle.
I'm dealing with the PAWS now ..the depression, the anxiety, lack of enthusiasm, lack of energy, rage, emotions, depersonalization, nerve pains, weird feelings on the body, hopelessness, the idea it will never end, suicide ideation etc. ... big time.! I feel like all I'm doing is WAITING. I hate it.
Reading .. and RE-reading here helps me tremendously.
It's comforting to know I'm not alone and it WILL get better.
I hope everyone is doing alright. It's been a while since I've seen a lot of you post. Especially those who are good at putting their feelings down in typed words.

:::waterview let me hear from you!:::

:::KC where are you?:::


caretown and forget_me_not and sad_lou ---- Stay strong! You can do it. I know you can!

When you feel weak and hate the world... come here and read. And re-read if you have to.  It takes time. I hate hearing that. Time drags. It feels like you're never gonna get better. But you will. I promise.

-Karen


5787980_tn?1397520009
by cali_soleil, Jan 03, 2014
I forgot my ticker!

1059641_tn?1277525976
by forget_me_not, Jan 04, 2014
Go, Cali!  At 61 days, I remember the PAWS being pretty rotten.  I felt okay a lot of the time, just okay, you know?  But then, out of the blue, some kind of wave of depression or anger would wipe me out.  I did not know how to handle it, so I stayed here and wrote and read and shared and let others help assure me it would get better.  That was in 2009, and I can say that it definitely gets better!  Some people say things like "don't make any major decisions for six months after stopping," which is probably good advice, but that suggests it will end abruptly and all will be well at six months.  It may not take nearly that long for you.  For me it took a bit longer.  We are all healing, though, and there will come a day, very soon, when you are sitting some place quiet and you just realize out of the blue that it's gone.  Just like that.  And while it may revisit you for short periods of time, those will get fewer and farther between until it stays gone.

Hang in there, warriors.  It's hard, but you will be okay.  I promise.

~fmn (clean 4 years Sept 2013)

738790_tn?1377724594
by KC67, Jan 04, 2014
Thanks for all of the recent posts.  They really help and uplift me.

I am now close to being 7 months clean of this awful drug.

I come to this site almost daily, but most times I feel so badly that I don't have much positive to say, that I don't post anything.  Also, I find it terribly difficult to write when I feel this way.

At almost 7 months out, I am still struggling.  I was absolutely dreading the holidays and am so relieved that they are over.  I was super busy - like almost every day I had someone to visit, something to do, or something to cook.  I don't  advise overdoing yourself in any part of this withdrawal.  Anyway, I ended up completely falling apart on Christmas Eve - like locked in the bathroom sobbing my eyes out so my kids and husband wouldn't know.  I think all of my busy-ness caught up with me and just hit me like a ton of bricks on Christmas Eve.  It was so sad.

The good news is that I am beginning to see signs of major improvement.  I still have the daily morning dread and anxiety, but each week it seems to be lessening S L O W L Y.  

Cali_Soleil, your post was so accurate and the waiting - omgosh -  the existing - day by day is so very tiring.  I also have random bouts of anger.  I recently got in a fight with my sister and said some really mean things.  Afterwards, I just cried and said, "Who was that???"

I used this evil drug for 10 years at varyingly high doses each day.  Then I would quit for a few days thinking that I was giving my brain and body a break - only to start right back up again because the withdrawals were unbearable.  Lord knows what I did to my brain with all the attempted quits, and mini 2-3 day quits.  So, I have to believe that this is taking longer for me.  Also, I am in my late 40's so perhaps my brain just doesn't snap back to normal like it used to when I was younger.

I still feel intense sadness at times.  And hopeless at times.  But not as often as I did in the early months.  I have to force myself to think positive thoughts because it doesn't take much for me to beat myself up mentally and convince myself that I am the worst mom and human being ever.   And how in the heck did someone like me get so far into this addiction?  How did I allow this to happen?  

I have to force myself to extend grace.  I am not a bad person and I want desperately to get the old KC back.  The one who was happy and loved getting up in the morning.  The one who didn't need a pill just to get through the day.  The one who cared about her family and others -  and life.  I know she is still in there somewhere.  I just have to continue to extend myself the grace and time to heal.

Time...it's my worst enemy right now.  

I love all of you and pray for your continued healing off of this evil drug.

Sincerely with love,
kc

p.s.  Madtram - so wonderful to see you back.  You, Emily, and FinallyFred were such a light to me the first time I quit several years ago.  Are you completely back to normal now?  I remember you were fearing you had chronic fatigue syndrome.  I hope all of that has disappeared with the tramadol.  And Forget Me Not, I remember you too.  You are such a sweetheart.  Thank you.

1059641_tn?1277525976
by forget_me_not, Jan 05, 2014
KC, my goodness!  I can relate to everything you said.  Every single word.

For any lurkers who may be reading these posts and come across this thread on PAWS, let me say very clearly -- I am four years clean, and post-acute withdrawal is a reality, but NOT something that you need to be afraid of so much that it keeps you from getting clean.  PAWS is a reality for some of us, not all of us.  However, even though we may struggle with some drawn-out weirdness, in no way should that discourage you from quitting.  Even with PAWS, life is immeasurably better than it was while I was taking the pills.

KC, I think you and I might have a lot in common.  It took me a long time, too, for the pendulum to stop swinging and settle in the middle.  Weeks and weeks, as Emily and Fred said.  More like months and months.  I had the outbursts of anger, the crying, the feelings of anxiety, the insomnia that came and went, and the feeling that everything was over, and I was just waiting.  But not all the time. Those feelings were punctuated by little "previews" of what life would be like post-withdrawal, once I reached equilibrium again, or as close to it as I was going to get.  I had major depression prior to taking tramadol, though.

Emily recommended a book in a previous thread and I read it.  It's called "Facing the Fire" -- I forget the author's name -- but it's about dealing with internalized anger.  I didn't realize how much I had suppressed anger throughout my life, and much of what I was experiencing during PAWS was that anger bubbling up.  When I was growing up, throughout my teenage years and into adulthood, there were quite a few things (I won't get into them here) that happened and I did not resolve my anger about those events.  Also, on top of that, I realized that I had not grieved several losses, either.  Instead of going through the grief or dealing with the anger, I took a pill.  I cried now and then, but I took a pill and carried on and did not grieve or get mad.  Of course, that catches up with you as well.  So my story was complicated, the anger and grief were sometimes too much to handle.  But I kept reading, kept coming here and seeing the words on the screen from others who said they experienced the same thing, and that if I kept going, it would get better.  

As Winston Churchill said, "If you're going through hell, keep going."  I thought of those words a lot.  Just keep going, one step at a time.  Your brain will recover.  You will experience joy and energy and vibrance again.  You WILL, KC.  You will be happy and enjoy getting up in the morning again.  Just give it a bit more time.  ((((KC))))

Peace, warriors.
~fmn

Avatar_f_tn
by Kylie4501, Jan 08, 2014
Hey everyone,

I am 79 days clean today and it feels so good!!

I have to be very careful though because I catch myself thinking about the pills and how nice it would be to just "try a few". NOOOOO! Then I remind myself of how far I have come and how horrible the w/d's were. I am feeling pretty decent these days but wonder if the PAWS is starting. I still have rage episodes and have been feeling pretty down lately. It is mostly because I have gained quite a bit of weight since I gave birth to my daughter 4 months ago. I have never been this heavy. I ate so many snacks while on Maternity leave and it now just caught up to me. I feel disgusting everyday and I never want to dress nice. I come home from work and put on baggy clothes right away. I am in a slump and need to be very careful and get out of this.

I just joined weight watchers online and I have been doing good the last week. I think I replaced the pills with food and now it takes everything in me not to go get a snack or drink a soda. I have not had a soda or snack in three days and I feel great so I know if I start eating healthier, that my moods and recovery will go faster. My eyes are still red and irritated so I think I am going to make an apt with an eye doctor.

I have 2 kids under two so I am pretty busy which I feel helps me out. I really don't have time to feel depressed or think about pills too much. I just know if I can lose some weight I will feel much better. I need to start taking better care of myself!! It is so nice to talk with people who KNOW how I feel and what I am going through. Stay strong!!

Avatar_n_tn
by caretown, Jan 08, 2014
Day 23 Tram Free......

Things are so much better. The random anxiety the first couple of weeks was almost unbearable now I'm actually starting to feel like a normal functioning human - laughed today for the longest time with a friend. I was taking tram for 5 years, at the end I was up to 6/50mg a day. Forcing myself to workout and get out of the house (even if it's just to the grocery store) even starting to resemble myself again.

For you all that have recovered - what do you do for pain now? I got stuck on the tram ride because of my back and now I'm tram free but don't know what to do about the pain. IT HURTS AND BUMS ME OUT - HELP.  It's worse than I remember -  daily now and 5 years ago it was on and off. I'm taking Advil and Tylenol daily and not getting any relief. Scared to go to Dr. cause I don't want them to dope me up again....is there any type of prescription med that will help the pain and not get me dependent? Non-Narcotic recommendations pretty please.

Hope everyone is doing well. :)      

Avatar_f_tn
by i_will_do_it, Jan 09, 2014
First day here..its been 8 years...and knowing that tramadol is going to be a controlled substance in june 2014..made me start researching tapering off tramadol slowly...then i ended up here..i am glad there are others i can talk to about this and i am not alone!! i need to end the madness now!!!

Avatar_f_tn
by i_will_do_it, Jan 09, 2014
http://www.choosehelp.com/topics/detox/ultram-detox-tramadol-withdrawal-pains.html    i was reading this link and somehow ended up here.

Avatar_f_tn
by waterview4326, Jan 13, 2014
Hello My Tramadol Friends

   I turned my computer on yesterday and I was surprised at the PM's I received. I have not been on much since Christmas due to some family issues that have been weighing on me.  I am still sober and in the battle to get to the other side. Unfortunately getting sober has been sobering to say the least for me. I just wanted to thank those who were checking on me, very very sweet. I have a lot on my plate right now and as soon as I feel I can get it together I will be on to post some. To anyone reading through all of this I am still greatful to be off trams, a clear mind I have for sure now. The journey has been slow and long but I am greatful to have a safe place here. I thank all of you for checking on me, I am doing well in my sobriety, now if I can just get my life the way I want to LOL!!!!! I guess it is all a work in progress. I will be posting very soon

Avatar_f_tn
by i_will_do_it, Jan 14, 2014
In two weeks I have tapered down to 150 mgs a day ...i was at 450 mgs a day...3 in the morning 3 5 hours later and three 5 hours later...now i am at 1 ... 1.... 1....I have to say something i think is helping is that i got a nutrabullet...no , this is not a plugin for it, but i have to say..doing nutrablasts every morning with the greens and fruits and maca powder and goji berries has helped tremendously!!!  i tink i am going to remain at one 50mg for another week and start cutting them in half and doing that another two weeks, then fourths...and so on!!! feeling fine right now. its amazing, because i have felt withdrawals from this before and this time, they are not so bad...prayers and hope for everyone!!


Avatar_m_tn
by traumadoll, Jan 24, 2014
Here's the deal. I've been lurking. I've been a slave, literally, a slave to tramadol for over a decade of my life now. I have worked myself up to 350-400mg daily and have been sitting at that dose for over a year now. I typically use 100mg to start the morning, then work my way up to usually 400mg by evening time. I wake up every morning with intense withdrawal until I take first dose. I have had such a love affair with this drug for the past ten years that what is about to happen scares me to death. Granted, I have been through withdrawal before, but it seems so much more intense these days. I flushed the rest of my tablets last night. Refill is not allowed until later next week. Look, the deal is, I'm done. I will admit, I have a few Norco (hydrocodone/APAP) laying around and began to feel intensely uncomfy a couple of hours ago and started using the Norco. Stupid decision. Good thing is, after using these, no opioids will be available tomorrow, or the next day, or the next day, and so on. I am scared to death of the withdrawal. From what I remember they are brutal, and I have been forced into it in the past. Never made it all the way through the WD process before more tram was picked up at the pharmacy. This time, I am more determined. I can't live like this anymore. I am currently on unemployment and must find a good job soon. Because I am unreliable with this dependency running my life. Highly reliable on the tram, but running out early happens a lot. And what happens? Terribly sick. Therefore, I am not reliable with this current pendulum of tramadol dependency and addiction. Just wanted to get started on here. I will create a ticker tomorrow. I am tram-free today, however the hydrocodone is pausing the withdrawal for now. The real battle begins tomorrow.

1059641_tn?1277525976
by forget_me_not, Jan 25, 2014
Traumadoll, welcome, and please share your experiences as openly and freely as you are comfortable with.  We've been there, we understand, and we are going to support you and help you as you break free from the poison.  I like the slavery metaphor, by the way.  Isn't it the truth?

You can go back and read some of Emily's former journal strands and get a wealth of information from others who have gone down the path before you.  You can benefit from their experiences, their discoveries, and most of all, their successes.  Also you are most welcome to my journal, which contains a few entries I wrote during my post-tramadol withdrawal period.  I wanted to put it down in the hope that it would help someone else.  You may find some comfort and helpful info there.  Mostly, just read through old posts and share, share, share here when you can.  It's not easy, nobody will tell you it's easy.  It may be the hardest thing you will ever do.  But it is worth it.  I'm tramadol free now since 2009, and came from a dose even higher than yours.  You can do it, and it's so worth the temporary pain and discomfort.  

love and peace, warriors…
~fmn

738790_tn?1377724594
by KC67, Jan 30, 2014
Today is my birthday and I am almost 8 months FREE of the evil drug called "Tramadol".  I say "free" because I too was a former slave to these pills - you absolutely speak the truth Traumadoll.

I have been waiting - sometimes just existing - day by day by day - to feel better and to be able to come on here and post that I am finally better.

Well, Today is the day!  

To give you a quick recap about my journey, I was addicted to Tramadol for the past 10 years before I found Emily's journal.  My first time quitting was back in 2009.  I only made it to about 67 days before I relapsed.  From 2009 to 2013, I began a roller coaster ride of quitting/relapsing.  I relapsed so many times I lost count.   Every time I would convince myself that I was better on trams and that they helped me and that I really wasn't a slave to them.  

I finally quit for good on June 3, 2013 and now know I will never take another tramadol again.

I am sure that part of my recent overall feeling of well being is due to the amount of time I have away from my last pill (i.e.  8 months).  But I wanted to share something that really made a difference for me.

I recently saw a movie called "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead" (website:  RebootWithJoe.com) and I recently read a book called "Awakening" by Stovall Weems.  Both the movie and the book were about the benefits of fasting.  At first, I thought, "I could NEVER EVER fast.  No way!  Not for me.”  I love food too much - especially carbs, breads, and wine.  But both the book and movie intrigued me enough to cause me to ponder fasting.

I am not fat, sick or nearly dead, but I have gained 20 pounds since quitting Tramadol.  I don't know what tram withdrawal does to our brains, but for me, I could not get enough junk food, carbs, breads, and sweets after I quit - hence the 20 lb. weight gain.  I remember reading that tram is stored in our fat cells and my fat cells were screaming daily to be inflated with all the junk I was putting into my body.

Anyway, a few weeks ago, I decided to give fasting a try.  I was wondering if the fast would clean out / detox my fat cells and get rid of the remaining tramadol once and for all.  I mean, here I was almost 8 months clean and still feeling the blah/ doom & gloom/ sadness every single day.  Yes, it had gotten better since in the early withdrawal days, but it was still a dark, heaviness that I couldn't seem to shake.   So, I thought, "What do I have to lose?  It can't get any worse".  I figured worst case scenario:   I will lose a few of these unwanted pounds.

Since this is my first fast, I decided not to go 100% fresh vegetable juice (like Joe did in the movie), but instead I eliminated carbs (breads, pasta, rice), fast food, junk food, sweets, dairy, and alcohol.  So basically I am only eating lean protein (3 servings/day), Fresh vegetables (3-4x/day), and fresh fruit (2x/day).  Oh!  And lots of water (which I hardly ever drank).

The day before I started, I was scared to death.  It reminded me of the day before I quit tramadol.  Pure fear.  Deprivation is not fun - especially when I was cutting out all the stuff I Ioved!  But this dark tram cloud that has been hanging over my head was not fun either.  I had to give it a try.

So here I am about 2 1/2 weeks into my fast.  The first week was tough.  I had random headaches, minor shakes, and irritability.  The second week was way better.  And now I am halfway through the 3rd week, and I have to tell you - I am feeling so much better.  

I have lost 11 pounds and I do not wake with the doom/gloom/hopeless feeling anymore.  My sleep and energy level has improved dramatically.  I still have the same problems that I had before - nothing has changed.  But I feel so much better physically and emotionally that I don't want to turn to a pill or alcohol or any substance to help me cope.  I feel normal again.  Happy.  I thought I would never get here.

Fasting may not be for everyone, so I just encourage you to research it and check with your doctor before you try it.  Also, it may not be a good thing in early withdrawal as your body may need the extra nutrition and calories.

I wish everyone the best.  This is one beast of a journey - definitely the most difficult thing I have ever had to overcome.  

Sincerely with love,

kc


Avatar_n_tn
by hjayne, Feb 06, 2014
Hi Everyone,

I just want to share my story so you who are struggling can see the hope and know recovery can happen...and that you can fall down again and still get up. Tramadol is truly terrible and soooo much worse than people seem to know. I recently had a small relapse and am again off of it again. But my original ordeal with t was awful. I was on it for 3 years gradually building to 10 a day. I was having kidney problems and uti infections as a result. I was incredibly skinny which I loved, but I was a zombie and just wanted to be alone and high too much of the time. I know everyone knows that feeling of just wanting to have your t and no distractions. I went cold turkey and it took a year till I felt normal. I don't mean that to discourage anyone...it is definitely worth it...even though it often does not feel worth it when going through the worst of withdrawal. I struggled a lot to recover. The t made me feel more outgoing at times...more cheerful...but also constantly needing it like a complete junkie. And I did not have a history of addiction or drug abuse before this. I recently was really upset about some personal things and started again (after 5 years without) and had mild but crummy withdrawal the past few days. I was only taking 2 or 3 a day for about a month, but that was enough to know it would only get much, much worse if I didn't stop. I had a doctor recommend them to me for tmj pain, and wasn't strong enough to resist filling the script even though I should have known better (like I said, I was having personal issues and really struggling so I was weak). Luckily after such a short period and not a ton of pills per day it is seeming manageable. But that is why I am back to Emilypost! If you are in deep like I was back 5 years ago (for 3 years) please know that you can get through it and please be aware that you always need to be on the constant watch for moments of weakness and that falling back into it is soooo not worth it! The thing that is the most creepy for me is the familiar withdrawal symptoms of complete lackluster and lack of energy and the horrible sweats and totally "off" and disgusting sense of smell. It is familiar from the last time I went through withdrawal and just awful!!!! And the sad vanity-pleasing weight loss became possible to me without t by doing the dukan diet and exercise. I am not AS skinny, but I was too skinny at the height of my t addiction...I was skeletal. Now I am normal weight. I don't have great tips for withdrawal...it just took time. Sorry. :( I think hot baths helped a bit. It is just that NOTHING is worth the withdrawals from this horrible drug and you simply can't keep on it forever. You just need more and more to not feel withdrawal and eventually it will kill your body and mind.

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 08, 2014
I've taken tramadol for a little over four years usually six with my coffee in the morning then four at lunch then another five or six around five or six in the evening quiting is the easy part I've done that a hundred times staying quit is the hard part I've had 16 operations over the past few years and I have arthritis so bad I can't hardly move untill I have my morning dose I know I'll have to take something probably for the rest of my life but taking as much as I do can't be good for you every time is cut back on my dose I can't sleep and I'm freezing one minute and sweating the next and I have this feeling in my stomach like I'm missing something or lost something very important I think that's anxiety is their anything out their that would give me my sleep back I can deal with the other stuff it's the not sleeping is what drives me crazy and brings me back to taking more any help will be greatly appreciated

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 16, 2014
Did I post on a dead thread

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Feb 17, 2014
No James,.apparently its just really quiet here lately.

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 17, 2014
Oh ok that's fine

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Feb 18, 2014
I'm right there with you James. Cant taper, petrified of the withdrawals. Desperately need to do something

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 18, 2014
I can not stand the no sleeping and that funny feeling in my stomach I got to do something I know it can't be good for you what have you tried or done in the past that helped you

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Feb 19, 2014
Take gaba for brain zaps, imodium for tummy issues, and google Thomas recipe. That should help. Are you totally out or tapering?

Avatar_m_tn
by flippers, Feb 19, 2014
I hope this doesn't get deleted, because I really hate to see people suffering from what I believe to be the worst part of wd (lack of sleep), but the high dose loparamide (immodium) trick worked for me with very little lost sleep during my cold turkey wd. Makes going through wd much easier and I have quit ct without lop before, so I know the difference, and for me, it definitely helped considerably.

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 19, 2014
Booba77 and flippers thanks for the advice I'll try it I'm still tapering if u call it that how are u today

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Feb 19, 2014
Take gaba for brain zaps, imodium for tummy issues, and google Thomas recipe. That should help.

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Feb 19, 2014
Sorry I didn't realize I had already posted

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 19, 2014
Hey it's perfectly ok

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 20, 2014
Just wondering how everyone is doing

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 20, 2014
Just wondering how everyone is doing

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Feb 22, 2014
The Immodium did take the edge of the WDs in the early days!!!  It was almost instant relief.  I only used it a couple of times though.

I'm doing very well.  Not perfect... but better than I was last year at this time.  I was in my taper and I thought I was going crazy or going to die.

I am feeling more myself as the days go on.  I do have my bad days... but I also have fibromyalgia.  Not sure which is which.

Will get back to you all when I have more time.

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Feb 22, 2014
I almost cried when I saw my ticker.  I cannot believe I made it this far!  I never thought i could do this.  What a bumpy ride this has been.

Almost a year!!!!!!!!

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Feb 22, 2014
Congratulations to u

Avatar_f_tn
by tramadolhelp, Feb 27, 2014
I need help, I am on day 7 of no tramadol with the help of other meds but none now just natural and I do not feel any better. I can barely eat. Please help.

Avatar_f_tn
by tramadolhelp, Feb 27, 2014
I took it for about 3 years, usually 12 a day and I am determined to fight but I need help. I havent been to work in 1 week.

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Feb 27, 2014
Tramadolhelp I am copying and pasting a reply I made back in 2013 to a member here who was quitting ...  I think you can get some tips. The main thing is you can't stop eating ...  an Epsom salt bath and some soup ...

hang on let me find this ..

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Feb 27, 2014


If I were doing it all over again, I'd take the following to the cabin in the woods with me.

b12 sublinguals.  Under the tongue absorption is 90% as effective as a b12 injection

Nyquil ... generic works fine too.

Honey ... believe it or not this was invaluable. I used to carry the sticks you put in tea in my purse and snack on one when I felt the "I am going to die or freakout" creepy tram w/d

Chamomille Tea

Soup of choice ... I liked chicken noodle

Saltines

Little crunchy salty snacks .. pretzels maybe

applesauce

You can bring Immodium AD ... the generic helps. If your belly is killing you ... (we have GABA receptors in our guts) ... you may need this but people try to avoid taking it as it'll slow the detox

I hope there's a bathtub ... warm bath and Epsom salts really help

GABA supplements ... lots of controversy about GABA supplements but some here have said they stopped the brain zaps

Passionflower for anxiety

Skullcap for anxiety ... I ordered my suppliments from Swansons Vitamins online  ... I like them.

Loved Bach's Rescue Remedy, the liuid dropper one.

There's a tea by celestial seasonings called Tension Tamer that I loved ... very helpful

Ginger tea (I love Lipton Ginger Twist) and ginger ale for nausea

pudding? Jello? Some soft foods

Some kind of beverage that is very easy to drink ... gatorade ..  Water plain may hurt your tummy
.
Panthotenic Acid for Jaw pain and muscular relaxation

Melatonin for sleep but you might not sleep for ... awhile ... don't worry about not sleeping.  People don't die from not sleeping.  Just stay occupied. I couldn't read, but I could watch TV and obviously I could write ...

Ben Gay or Biofreeze

Pain patches like Salon Pas

Ice packs

Heat packs ... theraheat pads work well ... they last 8-12 hours and you can shuffle them around as things ache

Electric heating pad ... I put this on my belly ... it helped with stomach pain

an electric throw is nice ... cause you'll be cold and then too hot

Soft clothes ... to change into cause you'll sweat thru your clothes

Tons of movies ... comedies ... not a good time for Schindler's List ... although make no mistake Tramadol will tell you to watch tragedies.  It's an evil asshat of a drug and just basically wants you dead ... so do not listen to that Tramadol voice.  You'll recognize its voice.  "You need me just take one you can't live without me ... you should just give up this is too hard."  Liar.  It's a liar.

It's great your wife will come and help you ... it's going to suck and it will be nicer if she is there.  It's like the worst flu you've ever had but it is time limited,.  3 days of really bad ... ten 4 days of less bad. Then no energy and lots of acting as if for ... awhile.  It took me much longer than I wanted it to.

I would be happier if your Doc had also given you a few pills to help the withdrawal like one of the Benzos.  But I understand why they don't want to. I had Klonopin still when I came off and I am glad I did. I'm with the Thomas Opiate w/d theory.  They can help when you are super freakazoid.  I also used a beta blocker ... for blood pressure ...propananol.  It helped.  Was good when my heart felt like it was going so fast i was going to explode.  I feel like getting thru the first few days is probably what it feels like to be possessed by a demon.  But sweatier and grosser maybe.


I hope this helps.  Be comforted that you will be able to soothe yourself if you can prepare yourself a bit for the storm that is coming.  Right now I am sure Tramadol is telling you that you don't need to quit ... that you're better while on it and that you have more energy cause it is a cunning lair.   It is going to be ok, but really do as the Boyscouts say and Be Prepared.

Also.  When it gets really hard ... Get mad and go to War.  Really wen you think about it ... Tramadol hasn't played fair with you so ... kill it off ... murder it and stomp on its grave. That attitude helped me not ... die and the men on MedHelp who have been veterans really taught me that attitude and it helped!

Lots of love.

Thank you all for the kindness you show me and each other. It means so much to me that we all have this place.  

Em

PS. I know I have forgotten stuff so anyone else if you remember shout it out ... what helped in that first week ...


Avatar_f_tn
by tramadolhelp, Feb 28, 2014
Thank you so much Emily. I am wide awake at 1am, cannot sleep. Just want this all to end so I can be a mom again.

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Mar 02, 2014
How's everyone doing

Avatar_f_tn
by tramadolhelp, Mar 03, 2014
Anyone out there? Day 11 and still feel terrible. Will this lift soon so I can function at work. I look terrible:(,

Avatar_f_tn
by tramadolhelp, Mar 03, 2014
Anyone out there? Day 11 and still feel terrible. Will this lift soon so I can function at work. I look terrible:(,

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Mar 07, 2014
I'm sorry thelp, but that sounds pretty normal. Give it 30 days and you should be feeling a lot better. Be sure to take b12 and vitamins

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Mar 07, 2014
I'm sorry thelp, but that sounds pretty normal. Give it 30 days and you should be feeling a lot better. Be sure to take b12 and vitamins

Avatar_m_tn
by gizmo986, Mar 07, 2014
Can tramadol, after being on for 3 yrs., make pain worse? I take 150mg per day, and my pain seems to be getting worse.

Avatar_m_tn
by lostveteran, Mar 10, 2014
Well today is my day 2 of cold turkey tramadol withdrawal. I HATE this drug. I have been taking it for nearly three years and I go through this withdrawal every month. This is the last time I have finally had enough. I have never had to buy the pills I get them through the VA and get them every month. I also run out every month which has helped to show me that I am an addict. I have let them control me for too long and I am ready to stop.
I have one thing that I am concerned about at this point. I did what I always do and pushed the little button on the computer to get them refilled and now they will be here in about two weeks. I know by then I will feel much better than I do right now, and I just pray that I can remember how crappy I feel right now so I do not take them but throw them out. If I can do this then I know I can beat this forever. Every month when I go through this I think man this ***** I wish I had them but oh well they will be here soon enough. Not this month I am done. I spent my first two days last month sitting in a chair crying while my two beautiful boys asked me what was wrong I just told them mommy was having a bad day and they cried right along with me. I told myself I would never do that to them again and yet here I am at least I am alone and crying. I have to muster up enough energy to help on my sons field trip today and all I can think is I hope I don't start crying.
Well I am going to make myself get up and work out. I know I can do this I just have to continue to read these posts and have faith that I can throw away these things I HATE so very much.

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Mar 10, 2014
@gizmodo986  YES! Definitely yes!  Which is one of the reasons I quit!  I had a feeling that the meds were causing problems.  It also caused high blood pressure.  Now, these issues are gone... however, I am back to dealing with my fibromyalgia.. but I am able to manage it sooooo much better than before taking stupid tramadol.

Well, everyone, today is my one year off tram anniversary.  I did it!!!  I never thought this day would come.  A year seemed so far away.. esp the first few months off when time went by sooooo slowly.

I do have some aspects of normality these days.  That weird disassociation and suicide ideation, combined with extreme anxiety and depression have lifted.  I have little problems here and there.  Brain zaps... occasional bad waves.  They are totally manageable. I was on the drugs for 12 years.  I know my brain still has a little adjusting to do.  I was a different person last year.  I have learned a lot this year.  I am happy to be where I am now.

It is possible guys!  I remember before I started my taper I broke down on my knees crying and praying for the strength to get off this medication.  I did not think it was possible.  I used to fantasize what it would be like to not have to depend on these pills.  I never thought it would be a reality. But finally, one day, the awful side effects were too much and I tapered until I couldn't take it anymore... down to half a tablet split in one day... and then just jumped.  I don't know if I did the right thing, but the taper just seemed to prolong the agony for me personally.

Here I am.... PROOF that getting off this medication IS possible and that I didn't end up in a nut house.  I am also proof that there is life after tram and things do get better!

All my best! Hang in there!!

Avatar_f_tn
by tramadolhelp, Mar 10, 2014
Well.today is day 17, cant say im much better but a bit better, still have RLD, sleep.problems, very fatigued and the yukky sweats at night. Any idea when this will end? I had to take a valium to sleep last night.

Avatar_n_tn
by dm3410, Mar 11, 2014
Well here i go again, trying to beat the trams again after so many withdrawal/relapse rollercoaster rides i think this is  the first time i posted since last July. So much has happened since than like my sister was found dead in her apartment, ive tried killing myself, so many fights with my girlfriend but I need off this crap so bad but practicly everything ive tried hasnt worked. I can go a few days but something just snaps in my brain that tells me to take a tramadol than it starts all over again. Ive tried tapering, cold turkey, other pain meds, loperamide, vitamins, amino acids. I attended an outpatient group therapy center for alcoholics and drug addicts. Even when i was in group i couldnt stop, id take some before and after group so i stopped going for now. I have 4 kids i have to be there for so i cant sign myself into some detox place for a month. My psychiatrist put me on xanax so now my mind feels foggier. I asked my dr. for some suboxone but said he wasnt qualified to prescribe it. Well anyway today is day 1 again. I hope everyone on here is doing good because it takes a strong person to beat this poison!!!

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Mar 11, 2014
Dm

  Just take one day at a time  get through the now and worry about tomorrow when it gets their just remember it gets better I've tapered for months and I still am good luck to you

Avatar_f_tn
by tramadolhelp, Mar 11, 2014
Had anybody taken xanax to call them and help sleep for this aweful tramadol withdrawl? My Doctor gave me some but will it just prolong this agony??

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Mar 11, 2014
It won't prolong the agony Sweetheart.  Just don't take those xanax for very long ... seriously less than 10 days if you can help it ...  Small use of benzos .(aka Xanax).. they don't work the same way the Tram does and won't impede the Tram leaving the building.

I'm sorry it hurts so bad.  Don't worry though ... it will pass and you will be ok.  Just try to stay as calm as you can.  When you can't sleep ...just close your eyes and try to breathe.

647911_tn?1373318247
by nic374, Mar 12, 2014
Ya I've had a vicodin addiction for 9 years I came off of them for almost a year when I was pregnant but always went back.here I am again taking meds I can't afford..  But does suboxne help short term. I have 4 kids and I am divorced both are parents have passed and my sister leaves out of state so I need to stay functioning I dont have anyone to help me out, but really hate taking these meds before I just tapered my self off.any ideas on the w/d medicine?

922048_tn?1387946184
by Sherri90049, Mar 12, 2014
Personally I'm not a fan of the Subutex. I did it and it took me nine months to stop that. The w/d meds are helpful, if you're referring to Clonidine and the like. I couldn't have gotten through it without that stuff. For me it's four years in May being off of Ultram/Tramadol. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I had alot of support from my DH. That helped. Not sure what advice to give you. Do you want to be able to eventually stop any opioid painkillers? There is so much support on the internet on this site and a few others. During the hardest parts, those amazing folks got me through.

My biggest beef with the Suboxone/Subutex route is that they don't make pills small enough to really do a taper. The 1mg tab is still alot. I ended up taper by having a compounding pharmacy make it into smaller and smaller doses. I went down to about 1/16th of a mg and then stopped after that, I believe. The fact that they won't make anything smaller than 1mg makes me think they want everyone to stay addicted to it. Just my two cents. I wish you all the best whatever route you decide to go!

Avatar_m_tn
by DonRet, Mar 13, 2014
I am new here, although i have been battling addiction for around 3-4 years now, it makes me sick to even say that considering where I was before.  

Initially I got hooked on tramadol because I used it for pain and had no idea how much it felt like stronger opiates. I got addicted to the rush and motivation it gave me.  After about 3 months I knew I was addicted and got scared and was able to go C/T for about 3 weeks before relapsing.  It was much easier to detox back then, back before it really messed your life up. I knew back then that no one knew, and it hadn't really changed my life in anyway.

I made some poor decisions when I would take tramadol, I would spend money like it was nothing, and I even took a new job far away that I probably wouldn't of taken if it weren't for the influence of the drug. Tram made you feel like everything will be perfect.  However once I moved I had a bunch of remorse about my decision and it lead to almost like a very prolonged panic attack.  By this time I was taking adderall, which I had a script for, and the tramadol together just to numb the pain, but it made me a different person and I stopped doing things like working out and being social.  

Anyways, I ended up getting my former job back and I moved back, however people could tell something wasn't right and I got to the point where I didn't want to see people from my old gym or anything because of how self conscience I was about letting my body go.  My new job was pretty stressful and required me to travel every week to different locations and dealing with the local offices, so I was always afraid of running out while on the road and going through withdrawals.  By this point the tramadol did nothing, I could take 15 at a time and get nothing out of it.  I started ordering DHC which is a more powerful codeine off the internet.  The problem with this is that I had to wait for the overseas shipments so at least once every month or so I would be really down and out for a few days until they came in, I would take the tram to keep the pain away but mentally I couldn't get out of bed, and I was still taking adderall as well.

I am now at this stage where I don't know if depression is crippling me more than the drugs, I don't like leaving my house, I don't like seeing anyone, I just constantly think about how bad I have made things and how hard it will be to get my life back.  My job allows me to work from home but I just moved to a new team and that team isn't as flexible with the work from home, there have been a lot of days in which I wake up in this nervous mood and can't get myself up for work.

I have had a history of depression and I have had a couple episodes where I would freak out about nothing major but it would eat at me for weeks or even months, so bad that I couldn't concentrate and would wake up feeling sick.  I think I am making this situation out to be much much worse than it is, although I know being hooked on these two drugs is bad enough, but if I am so weak mentally I don't know if I can't snap out of it even if I get clean.

I am curious if suboxone helps you mentally at all, are you able to think clearly like before you were on pills?  I know the horror stories of getting off sub, but I would almost rather have a constant script of sub instead of having to worry about trying to make sure I have enough pills because I have a big work project and having all these ups and downs. If I can get my life back mentally I think I can beat the withdrawals just like I was able to withdrawal off tramadol early on when I started taking it.  I just want to feel healthy and get back in the gym and build some confidence before I attempt another detox.  I have a great job that pays me a lot of money, if I lost that or quit to go to rehab it would probably make me even more depressed.  I am fine with an outpatient rehab but I feel so low mentally that I don't know if I am strong enough to stop without closing off the world and never leaving my bed.  I have been out of DHC since last Friday and I left my house once since then.

Sorry for the rambling, but I am sure you all know what its like.  I know I just need help, but I live in a small town so I don't have a lot of options that are close.  I have a pretty insane work schedule that is a major reason why I still rely on these pills, I can't afford to take time off because of project deadlines, plus I don't want everyone to know I am an addict.  

Oh, and my current dosage of DHC is around 1200mgs I just take at once during the day.

Avatar_m_tn
by DonRet, Mar 13, 2014
My dosage of adderall is 25mgs and I take one daily.  I used to hate the adderall but when I mixed it with tramadol it took the jittery type feelings away and I still had an appetite.  The adderall makes the situation so much more difficult because I can't really stop them both at the same time because I feel really really bad.  But I don't know which I should try to detox from first.  Sometimes the adderall helps during opiate withdrawal, at least a little bit on the mental side but keeps me awake.  I wish I just had 3 months off with zero obligations, unfortunately thats not reality.  

Avatar_n_tn
by dm3410, Mar 13, 2014
Today is day 3 for me. Im not experiencing any withdrawals at the moment probably due to getting a tooth pulled yesterday and got a small script for some norcos. Ive never had a problem getting off any other meds so i dont think thats gonna be a problem. Im prescribed xanax 1 mg twice a day so sleep is deffinetly not a problem. Dont really have much of an appetite but i try to eat as much protein as i can. Tonight i plan on going for a walk to get some exercise. Im just gonna worry about staying tram free one day at a time and worry about tomorrow or next week when it comes. Anyway just letting everyone know how im doing. Im gonna try to post more often to keep the tram thoughts from getting to me. I wish everyone luck and stay strong because were in this together and its a hell of a fight.

Avatar_m_tn
by DonRet, Mar 14, 2014
Has anyone had experience with suboxone that can tell me how it affects you mentally?  The longer you are on pills the more and more you get used to it and kinda forget what "normal" feels like.  I wake up every morning in this really kinda depressed, anxious, nervous state and until I take the meds its hard to even shower.  I know there is no way my body is in withdrawals already but its just the mental grip it has on me.  I am wondering if Subs have any effect on seratonin/dopamine levels or is it purely for physical withdrawal symptoms?  When you first start Sub are you mentally ok to go to work or are you still going to suffer the major depression and anxiety from withdrawals?  I can handle the physical part, its just the mental aspect that is so hard to beat.

Also, I hear where some people say you have to take Sub for 6 months minimum and have heard some say they were able to use it for around 2 weeks as a way to help detox easier.  Any advice?

Avatar_m_tn
by DonRet, Mar 17, 2014
Is the forum just unusually slow or has it been slow since Tram was finally changed to a controlled substance which made it hard to get off the internet?  I have been on here before and it was pretty active back then before the change.

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Mar 18, 2014
It seems slow don't it some days theirs a lot of posting then it seems like it's a week or more before theirs anything new I hope your doing well

Avatar_f_tn
by Kylie4501, Mar 28, 2014
Hey everyone,

It has been 158 days clean for me!! I am proud but have really been struggling the last few days. Tramadol made me superwoman and I could get everyhting done and then some. Sinmce being off of it, Ihave gained 25 lbs and am very depressed about that. I try to workout and eathealthy, but only last a day or two before I pick up fast food or snacks. I am lost and hurting! I fel fine and have energy to accomplish my day to day tasks, but I dont have any desire to accomplish them....what do you think will help me? I have been really thinking about the pills and that scares me. I tell myself I should just take them so that I have the energy to start working out and losing weight, and then once I do I will stop the pills again. UGH...Please give me some advice on how to get over this depression from my weight gain!

Avatar_m_tn
by gizmo986, Mar 28, 2014
Is vomiting to be expected when withdrawing?

Avatar_f_tn
by L_Lady, Mar 30, 2014
I just wanted to post saying that I am doing well and that I would very much like to be available for anyone struggling with tramadol when I can.  
Please, anyone who wants to, send me a message.  I get notifications by email and will respond as soon as I can.  This site and Emily's journal gave me the hope I needed to quit Tramadol for good.  Everyone here deserves a life free from tramadol!!!

Avatar_m_tn
by saccot, Apr 02, 2014
Started a quick taper.  Was taking around 15 per/day and got word about possible trouble in the supply chain and it looks like Tram is getting scheduled this summer and decided it is time to circle the wagons.  Came clean to my wife, she has known for a year and a half, but I told her that I can't get off this by myself.  I am going to med detox in 8 days but I don't want to go from 15 to 0 so the plan is too taper as much as I can then go in.  From previous attempts to get off this I have some Clondine & Hydrooxyzin which have really helped for a quick taper.  That is not to say I don't feel like absolute crap.   Day 1 I got down to 5 a day. Day 2 I got down to 4, and this is Day 3 I am not sure if I will drop down to 3, I think I will stay at 4 one more then drop to 3 tomorrow.  If it is ok I will post my progress until the 10th, it does helping writing it out.  

Thanks.

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Apr 02, 2014
I have some clonidine and am going to attempt a long taper because I've been on these forever and take 20+ per day. Do you wait until the tram is it off your system before you take the clonidine, or do you use it when you get to a really low dose? And what is hydrooxyzin? I'm trying to find something that will help for when I finally get to the end of the taper and jump off totally. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Avatar_m_tn
by saccot, Apr 02, 2014
For me low dose I'm still on Tram I am trying to taper pretty fast.  The Clonidine does help I don't think I could go from 15 per/d to yesterday 4 without it (today is the 3rd day of my taper).  I still feel terrible, but I am at work.  The last 2 days I was taking 1 a day but I have enough to take 2 now.  

I misspelled it: Hydroxyine.

The 1st Dr I went to to get help with this gave it to me.  I used it once during the day and everything slowed down.  Too much to be at work or in public.  It was not pleasant.  I didn't touch it until I decided I have to get off this ride.  I use it before I go to bed day 1 I was out, day 2 I tossed & turned for an hour before I could fall asleep.  But eventually it knocked me out.  I have been able to sleep through the nights both days.  

So I use Clondine during the day and the Hydroxyine at night.  For me they seem to do the same thing with different degrees.  I can function on Clondine during the day and use the other at night when I need to sleep.

If you are still around after the 10th when I check in I will let you know what they gave me but my guess you will need Dr. to get it.  Depending how long your taper is you may not need anything more then a long weekend.  I have also heard Krantom works for some people.  Also heard of someone cutting up the pills into 1/4's.  

Good Luck.

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Apr 02, 2014
Thanks a ton for the info

Avatar_m_tn
by saccot, Apr 03, 2014
Got to 3 yesterday.  On the Clondine script it said I could take 2 a day so I did, and was able to cut off another pill.  I do feel like crap (really foggy head) but I am at work.  



Avatar_m_tn
by saccot, Apr 04, 2014
Got to 2 yesterday.  Probably tapering too fast, had a terrible night.  Slept on the floor so I would not bother my wife, I had really bad restlessness in both my arms & legs.  I am going to kick it at 2 for a day, then start cutting pills into either 1/4 or 1/2.  I have tried to get off of this before and for me it gets really hard for me when I get to 3.  

Also bought a large coffee this morning which has really helped with the foggy head (yay!), but now I am unfoggy and have to stay within 30ft of a bathroom at all times (boo!).  

1005934_tn?1279907249
by jbr999, Apr 05, 2014
Hi Tramadol Warriors,

I've been lurking on this forum for some time. I've tried many times to quit tramadol without success. I once went 6 days but the W/D symptoms did not subside noticeably in that time and I had to go back to work, so I started back on them.
I am now at 2-3 per day and have been trying to taper but it isn't working.  It seems that the horrible withdrawals (you all know, restless, aching legs, night sweats, flu like symptoms, insomnia, and general malaise) come on full bore when I even decrease from 2 to 1 tab daily. For instance I tried to cut down to 1 tab tonight, and the one tab did absolutely nothing!. I might as well not have taken any. If I'm going to have full-on withdrawals I might as well go C/T. It seems, for me, that there is no such thing as 'mild withdrawal symptoms'  with tramadol.  So. I took 2 tonight, and plan on going CT
from this time.  Wish me luck and strength.  Hot baths help. Walking helps some. I have to accept the fact that I won't sleep much for the next week, but, as somebody said, no one ever died from lack of sleep--when I get tired enough, I will sleep.  Thank you Emily for keeping this forum alive.

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Apr 05, 2014
I say that ... from personal experience ... no one dies from lack of sleep.  You'll probably feel awful jbr999, but you won't die.  Try not to get upset about the lack of sleep. I learned that over all the time I spent getting off the pills.  Just try to stay even and calm.  I agree with you on your plan.  Sometimes on lower doses, with the right time frame, CT makes sense.  

You can do it ...  life really is better w/o Tramadol.

1005934_tn?1279907249
by jbr999, Apr 07, 2014
Well,  this is day2 without the little white pill.  Feels like I have the flu.  Aching all over. Just want to sit in hot tub all the time. Having diarrhea. On the plus side, I did sleep 4-5 hours last night.  No Benadryl, it doesn't help, in fact it makes me feel like jumping out of my skin. Did I hear someone say Epsom Salts in the bath helps?  I'll try that.  This is the first time without tram for several years.  It'll probably take some time for it to clear out of my system. What time frame?  A week, a month?  I hear a lot about PAWS, and that it can go on for months, but right now I'm only concerned with AWS, I'll worry about PAWS later.  

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, Apr 07, 2014
Yes Epsom salt baths really help.  Soak it up!  The worst day are the first 3 ... then there seems to be a break at Day 10.    

1005934_tn?1279907249
by jbr999, Apr 07, 2014
I have to say the only reason I haven't taken any trams is that I said here I wouldn't. I'd really feel awful of I said I was going cold turkey and then reneged on my word. If I just quit posting you'd know what happened. I've made a commitment to you guys and I aim to keep it. I don't want to be a slave to any pill. I see now tram gives more pain than it relieves. I've been taking it just to ward off the nasty withdrawals, which have nothing to do with the original pain I started them for--that pain is long gone.

1005934_tn?1279907249
by jbr999, Apr 08, 2014
"Bumpy ride" huh?  Yeah, a bumpy ride through Hell !  My legs are aching and burning so bad I don't know how much longer I can stand it. Got up and exercised and stretched, gave some temporary relief, now it's back.  I hope this night is the worst it gets, or I may need some chemical help to get through this.  I find myself saying,  "Can this really be from the tram? Maybe I just have severe neuropathy, and this is just how it will be without the little white pill."  I'll try to hang on a little longer, one minute at a time.

1005934_tn?1279907249
by jbr999, Apr 08, 2014
Well I made it thru the night without taking any pills. One of the worst nights I can remember. Tonight will be the 3rd night, then hopefully it will ease up some. The days are not so bad b/c I can stay active and engage in diversionary activities. I can't imagine anything worse than last night but we'll see. I feel that if I made it thru last night I can make it thru anything. The saving grace is that the worst of it comes and goes--it's not constant, it does subside for periods--enabling me to sleep for a couple of hours.

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Apr 08, 2014
Jbr

  The restless legs and no sleep absolutely drove me insane I did get some requip for my restless legs and it helps I'm still tapering best of luck to you

Avatar_m_tn
by saccot, Apr 09, 2014
Was out of town a couple of day and it didn't throw me off the taper.  Got to 1 a couple of days ago and have split the 50mg 25mg in the morning & 25mg at night.  Feel much better during the day then I did last week but am having really bad sleep and restlessness.  

1847230_tn?1320430761
by Sarabie, Apr 13, 2014
Hi guys. Well I actually just wanted to check my tracker before having to go back to 0 days

1847230_tn?1320430761
by Sarabie, Apr 14, 2014
Oh half my message disappeared. My ticker says 963 days but the truth is I relapsed in December. Too much work, too much stress and too many emotions. During my first tram period, I was addicted for 6 years leading up to me popping 24 50 mg's a day. I went CT back then and was miserable for a week. After that it was just physical withdrawel symptoma like being so extremely tired I couldn't even vacuum the floors.

This time I controlled myself. Highest dose was 6 50 mg's a day but mostly only 4. But very fast I found myself counting pills again. Thinking about the next bottle, hiding a few in my pockets so I wouldn't run out if I wasn't home. 10 days ago I went cold turkey once again. I can't taper. To me it's about all or nothing. I had about 150 pills left and flushed every single one. Including those found in my clothes. The WD's weren't that bad. No physical pains anywhere, just feel like having a bit of the flue. Constantly sneezing though and lacking energy. But when I get that tired, I fetch the iPad and play all of my favourite music. That gives me energy. My luck is that I'm working from home (author) and making stuff up is like my favourite thing to do. So I'm working as much as I can. I'm struggling a bit from lack of concentration, so it takes longer to write than usual. Taking my time.

Compared to my first CT this is nothing. But my problem now is that I write so much funnier when being on tramadol and it scares me. I know I'll do it again the next time the world overwhelmes me. It's my pacifier. Hopefully I'll wait another few years and stop again before I ruin my own and my loved ones lives as I did the first time. Well I don't know but we humans tend to go back to stuff we know while being stressed. And those little devils soothes me when the world tumbles and swirls. Arghhhhhg !!!!

Anyways I needed to tell someone and this wonderfull forum never judges.

@JBR999 - I hope to see you on here again soon. Would hate for your sake if you relapsed when you've come this far already. But I now how tempting it is to say just f*ck it all and give me my tramadol and then leave me be !!!

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Apr 14, 2014
I've been fighting this drug for years and so far it wins every time hopefully you will be able to stay off of these pills this time for good

1005934_tn?1279907249
by jbr999, Apr 19, 2014
Well, as you probably guessed, I didn't make thru the 3rd night. Took 2 at 5am.  I' m not giving up. Maybe going from 2/day to. 0 is too fast. I'm now at 1.5 /day and plan to drop to one a day for at least 3 days before jumping off. This is one b****h of a drug to get off of. Wish me strength to persevere.

334144_tn?1324321496
by booba77, Apr 23, 2014
Boy this thread is dead. It used to be hopping with activity. James how is your taper going? Once I get time to count my pills, I'm drafting a taper schedule. It will have to be a very slow taper though. I usually go cold turkey, but I've relapsed so many times I have to try something else.

Avatar_f_tn
by wake_up_2live, Apr 24, 2014
I have been under the control of tramadol for 3 years now , it was doing what was needed at first, shutting of the pain after the operation ( car accident) , helped me get around , work.. etc. , but now , NOW it’s the worst thing i ever done to myself , I feel I have ruined myself with this drug, this drug is a nightmare, it robs you off your humanity and real being, it destruct you , am afraid if I quit I won’t be able to adapt , I don’t remember how I used to be like before it,

I want to live normal again , I want to be the normal me again , I want to enjoy life with all its ups and downs , feel and sense like am supposed to , I haven't tasted or felt anything and enjoyed it , like simple things , smell , taste , touch , they are all vague and not normal , emotions are never stable . nor thinking , feeling lost is always persisting … short and long memory lost is ugly , forgetting things , feeling tired , controlled , trapped , depressed ,Thinking about the next dose ,the feeling of guilt, the feeling of being under the control of a pill, I feel the past 3 years had just passed in a month time ,

I want to quit and have tried before for , lasted around a month , had a seizure in the process, and went through living hell for 10 days , a month later I couldn't adapt and got hooked again

Am on 3 tablets x225mg a day now (we get only 225 mg tablets where I live ( Egypt))) and just about maintaining ( I feel extremely exhausted, depressed , lost interest in doing anything, ,joint pain and muscle pain, get chills ) which is all opposite to what this drug should do in the first place but maybe as i dropped from fro, 750mg to 675 and trying to maintain , and it could be that i built tolerance

Now I need to quit but don’t know how to start , I understand tapering is important , but I have to quit before the end of May, any advice on a quick taper? Or CT ?

Now most importantly I am concerned about the withdrawal symptoms

Any advices to help with withdrawal? how to go through with minimum symptoms possible

how to overcome the RLS and insomnia, chills and depression during that phase?

I need medication to deal with it

I live alone but I can visit the Family but they should not be aware of what’s happening , I can pretend I have the flu , I can get 1 week of work , but that’s it , no option of visiting a doctor , Rehabilitation is out of the question , where I live it’s not acceptable to be labeled as a drug addict

Anyone can help ?? please it’s the only thing I can think of for the past 3 month , doing my research on WD symptoms, OTC drugs to relieve it, a lot of info and not all from reliable sources and made me more confused but I need the advice of someone who actually went through it , feel the same and can give a true helping advise and support throughout the withdrawal , no one knows about my addiction and it will help much sharing

I have been through this journal and a lot more , read a lot of members quit successfully with the support help and advice shared by others

Thank you all

Any helpful response is highly appreciated and of great help

Avatar_f_tn
by wake_up_2live, Apr 24, 2014
Seems like every body quit ultram , gotta go through it myself then, God be a though one,
any advice is appreciated,

Avatar_m_tn
by flippers, Apr 26, 2014
Wake-up -

I sent you a message on loperamide. Please do a little research on it on your own too. It's the only thing that REALLY helped with WD symptoms. Most importantly, educate yourself on addiction and the "addicted mind", how it works, etc. I quit c/t for 2 x 3 months, 1 x 4 months, and 1 x 8 moths, only to come back. I decided, after nearly 5 decades of life, that maybe I should focus on addiction as i've always known that I am "different" from other people. Tram is bad, but so is any drug/activity that one can become addicted to. Don't focus on how/why tram is bad, focus on addiction. Watch anything/read anything by Dr. Gabor Mate, as well as Dr. Jeffery Schwartz from UCLA. You have to have tools with real utility once the wd's are over or, as you can read over and over, you will probably relapse.



Avatar_n_tn
by GriffL, Apr 27, 2014
Dear Emily
Can you please point me in the right direction and link to the reference journal that you mentioned tramadol causes neuropathy. My husband has been on it for a year now post a spinal fusion and still experiences some neuropathy.
I am also expereincing from him aggressive behaviour and low tolerances outside of his usual demeanor. I love him dearly however this drug I believe is damaging our relationship and whilst I understand the need for chronic pain relief for the sufferer I have concerns over this drug and its side efffects and what it is doing to my husband. I would really do with quality articles to try and educate further and hopefully help him better, its affecting our communication. he is also getting sweats and insomnia. I am concerned i know there is dependence because of pain to treat, the quality of the mind with this drug I am struggling with the effects of seeing it in my husband and feeling powerless and needing an alternative. thank you.        

Avatar_m_tn
by gizmo986, Apr 29, 2014
Tramadol causes neuropathy? Please post this information. Will be greatly appreciated!

Avatar_n_tn
by Tramacrap, May 05, 2014
HELP! It 's all we r looking for! I am not a "druggie" but I quit Trams after a severe accident, tapered down to 2 x 50 grams/ day for a week. now c/t for 3 days..WTF? I'm sneezing, and all the severe withdrawals! Even drinking alcohol to take the crappy feeling away! The only answer I want is when does this end?

Avatar_m_tn
by ekey322, May 09, 2014
Hello Everyone, I'm so happy to find this group. I started taking tramadol after a bad broken ankle. I had taken it once before for another injury & so I asked for it post-op to step down from vicoden. After I recovered from that, I started having terrible headaches and since tramadol had worked before, my doctor prescribed it. Anyway, I now find myself addicted. I've now bought it over the internet 2X, at great expense. Now I take it to ward off overall body pain, nausea, and to feel good. I'm taking 100-300mg a day. I'm pretty sure i went through withdrawal once a few months ago when I ran out of my scrip. Felt crappy for 5-7 days. Now I know I need to get off but not sure I'm ready for that yet. I hope joining the forum will motivate me. Of course, its hard when I've got plenty in the drawer from my last purchase.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 12, 2014
I was on tramadol for 5 years.  I went to detox on April 1st, and it was hell.  I was taking about 10 pills a day, and can relate to all the posts above.  The doctor gave me subcoxone, and thought I was going to die.  I got SO sick on this drug, that I left AMA,  and finished the detox at home.  I didn't sleep for 3 days or so, anxious, hallucinating, terrible mood,crying, my eyes were half shut, and my body craved carbs and sweets.
I'm 6 weeks out, no drugs in my body.  I have a couple of good days, then I'll hit a bad day.  However I have found going back to the gym 3 to 4 times a week really helps.  I'm 50, and was in great shape, however lost all my muscle tone in one month.  It's a very slow process rebuilding muscle, as I don't have a drug to give that energy anymore.  

Ive read that it can take 6 months to feel like myself again.  My doctor wants me to go onProzac but I don't want any drugs in my body except Tylenol which helps the headaches I get.  I also think it was a habit to take pills all day.  



1683709_tn?1370713201
by sueduva, May 13, 2014
Well here I am, basically back in the same place I was 3 years ago. Detoxing off another drug, oh my god!

Unfortunately after coming off of morphine, my back pain was intolerable and I couldn't cope.
I ended up on Tramadol, which I didn't realize was actually more addictive than morphine.
I did ok for 2 years, this med gave me pain relief, a boost in my energy, and my mood. My mood was so good that I ended up coming off of my antidepressant. I thought this drug was marvellous, but it's not!

This year it stopped working for me, and I was at the max dose of 500mg. The Tramadol wasn't helping my pain, the depression came back and of course, I had no energy. It has been a very long cold winter, and I've been miserable.
Over the last month I have been able to taper from 500mg to 150mg. At 150mg, the withdrawal symptoms started to kick in. Yes kicking the habit, gives you those horrible restless legs, insomnia (I had a few hours of sleep last night)
Extreme nausea, headaches and the chills. It feels like a horrible flu that you can't get any relief from.

I've started reading Emily's journals, I wished I had read it a few years ago!

I knew I was in big trouble this winter, when nothing would help my back pain. Apparently it is the drug, saying "take more of me to get relief!"  I didn't give in, one of the side effects of this drug is seizures especially if you take more than 500 mg.  I did end up needing morphine to get me through the rough days. I was extremely upset, really annoyed since I had worked so hard to come off morphine 3 years ago. Needing the Morphine was the point when I knew that I would have to come off Tramadol, but wasn't sure how or when?

My family Dr. has put me back on Effexor since my mood was so flat, and I was extremely anxious. I will probably need to stay on Effexor until I'm off the Tramdol for at least a year. I'm also trying Baclofen (a muscle relaxant) to see if that gives me some back pain relief. But it is also a drug you must taper to come off; I'm just so sick of drugs.

I know I want to come off this drug, but the timing just ***** right now. Summer is just beginning, which I love, and I don't want to miss out on another summer, like I did three years ago.
(Since Winter started in November and lasted until the end of April!)

I've been going back and forth with my decision making?
Should I detox now, since I've dropped my dose, and go cold turkey? Or should I stay on a small dose this summer and finish the detox in October? I suppose I could try to do a really slow taper, but if I'm constantly sick, that wouldn't be my choice.

Well, I guess today, my thought is to do a very slow taper from 150mg. But I could change my mind, depending on my patience level? I may just scream, and say "get this f***** drug out of my body".


1683709_tn?1370713201
by sueduva, May 13, 2014
I just wanted to say hi to all the current Tramadol detoxers. (If that's even a word?)
We will be going through this together, that gives me comfort that I will have people who understand my situation.
I would like to thank Emily, and the rest of you who have continued to keep this site going and are still offer your support.
Truly grateful to have found this site, Sue

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 13, 2014
Wanted to ask if anyone else who has detoxed from tramadol has experienced loss of muscle in their face ( facial droop)?
Also do you regain muscle tone in the weeks following.

I posted above, and am 6 weeks off tramadol, and it nearly killed me, but feeling just ok.  I know what everyone says about missing that high.  I do as well, but never want to go through this pain again.

Also I read that Tramadol will be listed as a Narcotic in June 2014.  Is this true?

Megan

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 13, 2014
Sue,

I would get off Tramadol.  Like many have said it's the worse opiate to detox from.  I've posted a couple times above, and once the drug is out of your system ( 1 to 2 weeks ), PAWS hits.  For me the hardest part insomnia, lack of energy - I didn't want to get off the couch, and terrible anxiety.  It took a month before I slept 8 hours.  

I'm almost 7 weeks out and doing better.  I read a link that Emily posted, and it listed many things to do for your natural endorphins to kick in.  For example, completion of a small projects, walking, lifting weights.  I didn't do any of these until I was 3 weeks detoxed from tramadol.  I was taking 400mgs a day for 5 years.  I am so HAPPY to be off this evil drug.  I had no idea I would become addicted to this drug.  I thought it's not a Vicodon or Percocet.  Boy, was I wrong.

Hang in there Sue.  Hate to say this but it will get worse before it gets better.  However, life is SO much better off this drug.  It can't compare to the old days of being a prisoner to this drug.

1683709_tn?1370713201
by sueduva, May 13, 2014
Thank you Meganann for your encouragement.
What amount did you taper too, before you stopped taking Tramadol?

I will come off it, but after reading how long it takes, I just don't want to loose another summer to a drug detox.
Im hoping I can really slow down the taper, so I will have less symptoms? But I don't know if it makes a difference?

Sue

Avatar_m_tn
by AllAssistanceWelcome, May 14, 2014
I feel miserable. Two days in. My God. Miserable. Cold, hot, cold.  Hot. Dizzy, sleepy, and more I need support.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 14, 2014
Sue,

I went to the hospital as they have a detox center.  I was only there 3days as I got so sick from the subconox the doctor gave me, that I checked myself out.  I did the rest of the detox at home.  I didn't leave the house for one week, and started to feel slightly better.  It is he'll, I'm not going to lie about detoxing.  But, it's SO worth it.

I went from 500 mgs a day to zero in 3 days.  Hallucinations were terrible that first week, and insomnia was horrible., along with other side effects.  I took extra strength Tylenol for the headaches, and still take Tylentol once a day.   I also take Neurontin for anxiety and that also helps.  

Some days I'm still in a little fog, and my memory isn't the best, however I think that will come back.  I was on tramadol for 5 years, so I know it's going to take awhile.  

I really think you need help at a detox center if you can.  My insurance paid 90%, so wanted to try.  My experience wasn't the best in there, however everyone is different.  I also didn't realize how difficult the detox was until I went through it, however I was on a high dose.

Good luck, and I do check in every day.  Look forward to hearing from you.

Megan

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 14, 2014
To the post above 2days in;

Good for you !   Everything you are describing is normal, I felt the same as you.  All I can say is that it's HELL, but it will get BETTER.  How much and how long were you on Tramadol?

I'm 7 weeks out, and when I was on day 2 I kept telling myself, 1 day at a time, and at times thought can I get through the next hour.  I ate lots of carbs and sugar which helped me.  Probably not recommended, but helped with my upset stomach.

Hang in there, you made it two days.  Be proud of yourself.

,
Megan

544292_tn?1268886268
by EmilyPost, May 14, 2014
Anything you can eat is fine ...  even if it is carbs and sugar ... anything to get free of the demon Tramadol and never go back.

Eventually you will be free.  It won't hurt.  You won't even think about it anymore.

You'll no longer be the Prisoner of Tram ...

1683709_tn?1370713201
by sueduva, May 15, 2014
Well I'm having another night without sleep. So It is getting difficult to think clearly or get anything done during the day.
I did manage to eat today, yeah :)
I think I will do ok with the taper, since I was on 500mg a day for a few years and am now down to 100mg.

Thanks Emily for your helpful tips, I'm finding honey really soothes my stomach.
Ok goodnight, Sue



Avatar_f_tn
by notramadol4me, May 15, 2014
Hi Sueduva, and ALL others who are looking for help and support with Tramadol,
I took Vicodin or Hydrocodone for my arthritis for several years.  Then 3 years ago I had a knee replacement.   Of course the doctor told me that Ultram/Tramadol was preferable to other opiates.  After first being on Dilaudid and hydrocodone for a few months, he switched me to those innocent looking little white pills.  When he quit giving them to me I was up to 400 mg a day.  I then began ordering them on the internet.  My relationship with Tramadol went through all of the stages people write about here.  I learned to hate this drug.  I have been tapering off for 8 weeks now from 300-400 mg daily, down to 150  mg for about a month.  I then sought the help of a naturopath who is working with me on tapering further.
I am not having a problem sticking to the taper.  Once I decided that this drug is my EVIL ENEMY, I am sticking to the taper.  My doc is having a compounding pharmacy make me 2 week supplies. The first drop down was from 150 mg to 135 mg. I am on my second 2 weeks at a dose of 120 mg.  I'm coming down 15 mg at a time and experiencing very mild withdrawal.  I am tired and have trouble getting going, I am sleeping, but only about 5-6 hours a night, once I wake up, there is no way I'm going back to sleep.  My stomach is a bit upset at times, but not too bad, some headaches and a bit of sneezing.  Overall the physical symptoms aren't too bad.  I think that the depression and lack of energy and lack of interest in life is the hardest to endure, but at least I'm not having that AND bad physical withdrawal.
I realize some people cannot taper; It's just not something some people will be disciplined enough to do, and some people cannot go to a doctor who will help them this way.  My naturopath is also giving me acupuncture treatments for depression and withdrawal as well as Bach Flower Remedies and a homeopathic remedy.
It's slow, and it means I will be still on a very small dose of Tramadol when I go to my family reunion in July.(Which of course I am not looking forward to because I'm not excited or jazzed about ANYTHING right now)  However, I know that this too shall pass
I have always had a problem with depression.  Tramadol gave my personality a false sense of well-being and made me more social.  It made me feel as if all is just fabulous as long as I had my pills.  I depended on Tramahell to get things done!
Well, I may need to address the depression another way, and if I need an anti-depressant, then so be it. Taking more and more of the evil pill was becoming totally unmanageable.  Every morning when I woke up, Tramadol is the first thing I would think of.  I felt like a complete fraud.  I couldn't do the simplest of things without the fake boost from a substance


Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 15, 2014
Hi Notramadol,

That is wonderful that you are able to taper from tramadol.  I wasn't able to.  This is my 7th week off ( 49 days ) off this evil drug.  I take B12, a multivitamin, and have thought about doing acupuncture.  I feel A LOT better than I did the first month.

I still have some headaches, sluggish feeling.  After I go grocery shopping and run other errands I have to rest for an hour or two, as my head is foggy from the energy it took to do all of this.  I walk everyday for 20 minutes and go to a bootcamp 3 days a week.  I'm still pretty weak because I don't have tramadol to give me the energy I use to have.  HOWEVER I have times while I'm working out that I feel like my old self, strong and able to lift weights I didn't think I could do. I want the old Megan back, not the one on tram.

I was put on tramadol for headaches as I had a menningioma brain tumor.  I had gamma-knife, and was given more tramadol with unlimited refills.  I never thought I would become addicted to this drug.  Like others have said doctors told me tramadol was safe and not like other opiates.  I was taking up to 500 mgs a day for 5 years.  I didn't take that high of a dose in the beginning.  BTW my tumor was benign.  

Emily has a link towards the beginning of these posts that list ways your natural endorphins will kick in.   They were very helpful to me.  Like completing little projects around the house, some sort of cardio or weight baring exercise..  I can feel the endorphins, however it will take more time until I feel like myself again.

I'm so,happy I found this message board as it encourages me that I'm not alone.  Thanks Emily.


1847230_tn?1320430761
by Sarabie, May 15, 2014
To me theres only one way. CT. Done it twice now. First time was from about 6 years use and abuse (up to 24 pills a day) and it was pure Hell for a few weeks. Had to spend the first three days in bed, crying, sneezing and craving sugar and well yeah sex. My brain and body just screamed for endorfins. After those three
days I could get out of bed, but I was so extremely tired. Fell a sleep constantly and had lost all physical strengh. Took about 3-4 months untill I was back to being Susie before
Tramadol.

Second time wasn't that bad. I'd been really carefull and was on a (to me) small dosage. Just 4 pills a day, to get me through a really stressfull time. Went CT again and didn't have to stay in bed. I filled up on sugar and favourite music and was ok again after 3-4 days of sneezing and foul mood.

But I don't think I'll ever be completely off. When my world crashes and things are too tough to handle, I'll probably do it again. They give me energy to handle complicated stuff, and they keep me calm. So if I have another period as stressfull as this winter, I might seek my safetyblanket again. They actually helped me. The problem is when no longer needed... But I managed and I will again if needed.

Tramadol is considered narcotic in Europe. Can only be bought with a special prescription as they are highly addictive. So I guess it'll be like that in the US too.

1683709_tn?1370713201
by sueduva, May 16, 2014
Yeah, I slept a bit last night :) so I was hoping to get up and participate in life today!
But that hasn't happened, my stomach is a mess today and I'm extremely dizzy.

I know I should try to get out of bed, but my body isn't in agreement.

Dear Sarabie, please talk to your Dr. About other ways of handling stress.
I would hate for you to be in this constant cycle of coming on and off Tramadol, it's not a fun way to live life.
Have you ever tried yoga? I find it helps fight off anxiety and depression. You get a blissful state of mind after a class :)

I've been taking Tramadol for chronic back pain. Three years ago, I thought it was a miracle pill when I first tried it.
But I constantly need to up the dose for pain relief. When I got to 500mg a day, it didn't even touch the pain, and I needed
morphine! That was my wake up call. My self worth is pretty low right now, I feel useless, and feel like a terrible wife and mum. (Even though my immediate family are supportive, and all adults, I feel like I have let them down?)

Hopefully my body will adjust to 100mg soon.
Talk to you later, Sue




Avatar_f_tn
by notramadol4me, May 16, 2014
Hello to all of you out there who are listening.

I read all of the posts and feel grateful for the information I get from this forum.  I now know that there are some differences in the way we can get off Tramadol.  I also know that it's ok to either taper OR CT, whichever one you can pull off.
Someone posted about having an epiphany one day about taking Tramadol, after being on it for years.  I realized that I had this happen to me too.  I just found one day that I was thinking of the pills as if they're my mortal enemy.  I think I have now "personalized" these pills and made them a living thing that's trying to take my life from me!  It's just like Emily has said, this is WAR.
I just had a phone call from a friend who has known me for 40 years through many ups and downs, and I saw on the caller ID who it was.  She's a very dear person to me and I love her, but I just did not want to answer that phone!  Well, when I took the T's I would have been happy to chat, chat, chat, and be miss friendly, but now I have to make myself go through the motions.  I took the call and didn't talk about my depression, just small talk and catching up.  I know that my interest in life will return some day, but as everyone here says, it's so hard while we're waiting to get our old self back.
Sue, I am relating to where you are every time you post.  I'm at 120 mg and doing ok.  I'm worried about the PAWS, but going from 400+ mg daily down to 120 just HAS to be doing something toward mending my brain, doesn't it?

I saw a psychiatric nurse practitioner last week who put me on 40 mg of Prozac, and Sue I remember you saying that it wasn't good for you.  I just feel that if I don't try something for this depression, I am not able to go on.  It's scary to think that ending my life is preferable even to taking Tramadol.  My suicidal ideas are not well-formed or planned, and I am the kind of person who will not do that to my family, ever. Plus I love my animals so much, and their lives would be so badly impacted by me being gone, that my thoughts never progress that far.
Still,  the reason I am resorting to an anti-depressant is because I am so afraid of how dark everything seems to me right now.  I can cry over ANYTHING.  I don't want to DO anything, and I am isolating a lot.  Fortunately, my husband knows everything, (he and a couple of close friends are the only ones) and is very understanding and non-judgmental.  I am so lucky that way.  I'm hoping the P takes a little of the edge off of this depression.
I am an older person (64 years old) and have been addicted to the high and energy of opiates off and on over my adult life.  I always managed to get off them.  However, when I found Tramadol over 3 years ago, it took things to a new level.  I think someday, there will be a lot more known about how dangerous this drug is, but right now, most people have never even heard of it.  

Thanks to all who post their positive information and reactions to us who are beginning this journey.  I can feel that there are people reading and posting on this forum who really care and understand what I'm going through right now.  

I hang on your words of encouragement.

Today, I need to get some work done, and I have had several thoughts about taking some Tramadol "just this once", but I know it's the Tramadol talking.  

Love and Peace,  Katy

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 16, 2014
Hi Katy,

I'm 55 years old and I'm wondering if the PAWS are harder at our age.  I posted above and am 50 days off Tramadol.  For me the first month was very difficult, however I'm almost 2 months out and it's much better .  Im on Prozac too, 10 mgs and it's helping me.  I miss the high I use to get from tramadol, however each day I get a little stronger.  I use to be able to stay up till midnight, now I'm in bed by 9:00 and sometimes sleep to 7 am.  Maybe it's the Prozac or catching up on the sleep I missed in the first couple of weeks off tram and I was wide awake all night.

I wanted to tell you there is light at the end of the tunnel.  I'm happy you have a very understanding husband and shared this with a couple of friends.  My husband too was very understanding, and we didn't do anything ( socializing ) for about a month, as I was too tired, and didn't want to me off the couch.

Life is so much better off tramadol.  I take Tylenol for my headaches and Neurontin for anxiety.  My psychiatrist said it probably will take me 6 months before I'm me.  That's ok, as I was on this drug for 5 years, up to 500 mgs a day.  

Yes, it is the tramadol talking.  I got so much work done when I was on tramadol.  Now I have to rely on my own strength.  
I've thought the same thing, just one or two tramadols, however I don't want to start over.  I'm done with this drug.

Good luck to you Katy.

Megan

1683709_tn?1370713201
by sueduva, May 21, 2014
Hi friends,
Well I think my body is starting to get use to 100mg of Tramadol. I actually ate breakfast today, and unloaded the dishwasher!! A tiny step in the right direction.

I think the worst part for me is the dizziness, weakness and inability to think clearly. I'm still constipated, I don't know if it's still the Tramadol or if it's the Effexor? I was expecting to be running to the bathroom by now, but I still need laxatives.

Having a hot shower is the best part of my day.

Please share any tips that have helped you cope with the detox.
Thanks, Sue




Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, May 22, 2014
I think you have to be totally off tramadol before the constipation goes away.....at least that was my experience.  It then took 3 or 4 days after for my body to start working correctly.

It's great that you are down to 100 mgs a day.  The dizziness, weakness and not thinking clearly are detox symptoms, along with insomnia, anxiety and being nauseous.  Try to eat small meals throughout the day even if you are not hungry.

I take B12, 10 mgs or Prozac, and Neurontin.  I'm almost 2 months out from tram, and have gotten through most of the PAWS, except anxiety which is why I'm on the above meds.

I'm still trying to feel normal again, and after reading all the posts, it's going to take time......maybe 6 months to a year before I'm totally back to feeling good.  

What helped me was reading Emily's post and her recommendations that helped the detox process.

Megan

738790_tn?1377724594
by KC67, Jun 03, 2014
Well I made it!  ONE YEAR FREE of this poison called Tramadol.  

It took me a VERY LONG time to heal from this drug.  I tell you this not to scare you, but to prepare you.

I relapsed so many times I lost count – and it was all because I expected to be back to normal in 90 days or less.  Now, please hear me… there are many people who do heal in this amount of time, but my journey was different and longer.  This is a battle.  And if you are mentally prepared for battle, you are more likely to win.

I do believe that the severity and length of MY withdrawal (PAWS) was due to several factors:  the # of pills I took daily and the amount of time I took Tramadol.  I took 8-15 50mg pills/day for 10 years.  I also think my age (late 40’s) had something to do with my extended recovery – I just don’t heal as well as I did when I was younger.  And last, the reasons I took them contributed to the difficulty of my withdrawal.  I took them because I was trying to cover up and cope with a lot of life problems and they made me feel better for about the 1st year or so.  

I was more social, more productive, and even lost a little weight (because tram kills your appetite).  Then…like everyone else… they turned on me and I had to take more and more to get that same feeling – chasing that original “high”.  But it never was the same after they turned on me.

At first, I loved being social and going to parties and being around people while high on trams.  I also felt my exercise and workouts were enhanced when taking them.  But as time passed, I became more and more recluse and found myself not wanting to do anything.  Just lay around and watch movies or TV.  

I also purchased lots of “stuff” over the past 10 years and have recently begun to slowly clean it all up.  It amazes me some of the stuff I allowed myself to purchase and accumulate.  I also thought  I was superwoman and was more efficient, but really I was just a shell of a human being.  Not really feeling or caring about anyone or anything except if I had enough pills on hand.  

Again, I do not want to scare anyone but I am not going to sugarcoat my experience either.   I want to be completely honest so that if any of you have a similar experience to mine you will know how to be prepared and you will know what you're in for.
  
I don’t know any of you… and I have no other motive to post than to encourage and help people get off this drug.  I say this because over the past 10 years, I would read a post like I am typing now (i.e.  someone who was successfully free of tramadol), and think, “yeah right.  I am sure he/she is full of crappola”  or “I am not like them because I am not an ‘addict’ ” or “my situation is completely different than theirs because I can control my usage”.  

This drug will mess with your mind.  It will tell you anything to keep you addicted to it.  I am serious.

I have no other motive to post on Emily’s wonderful journal than to help.  If I can help one person get free from this drug, I want to do so.

Here are some of the withdrawal-related symptoms that I experienced:   Restless anxiety, intense depression and apathy, very poor sleep, self-hatred, intense anger, stomach issues (mainly in the first 2 weeks), auditory/visual issues (sporadic throughout), suicidal ideation (i.e.  wanting to die), zero energy or motivation, non-social (wanting to just stay in a dark room and watch tv), sweating then freezing, headaches.

Most difficult was dealing with the daily “blah” feeling – like nothing really mattered and I felt hopeless – day after day after day - like I would never improve.  I felt I was doomed to be like that forever.  Then there was the 25 pound weight gain – which I did NOT need.  

But….the good news is that ALL of these side effects are temporary.  ALL of them eventually went away with time.  I have even lost 15 of the 25 pounds I gained.  Still working on the last 10.  :-)

At 1 year out, I feel happiness again – and on a regular basis!  I am dealing with my problems without the help of drugs.  I am sleeping better again.   I am wanting to be around people again and the old me is back.  The freedom from the slavery of Tramadol is all worth it.  All the months and months of suffering and wondering when it all would end has finally ended.  

If I can offer you some advice it would be to be kind to yourself.  Tell yourself that you will fight this until it is over - however long that is for you.  When you feel depression, anxiety, hopeless - don't give up.  It WILL get better as long as you don't take any more tramadol.  It may take a short amount of time to heal - or you may be like me and take a long time.  But you WILL heal.

I echo Emily’s words above, “You can do this”.  And I will add that it IS worth it.

Sincerely with hope and love,
kc


Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jun 08, 2014
Thank you for the above post.  I felt the same way....very social at parties, my workouts were stronger than before, and felt like superwoman.  I bought clothes and stuff I would never have bought if I wasn't high on tram, then The drug turned on me. I became a recluse and wanted to just stay home and watch tv, and play games on my IPad.   I became a shell of a human being, only caring if I had enough tramadol to get me through the month.

I'm almost 90 days out, and went to detox to get off the drug.  I've never gone back, however I know I'm still in recovery and do get the urge to go back on.  I was taking about the same dosage as you for 5 years.  I've read other posts and do believe it takes at least 6 months or more to feel totally normal again.  I still have headaches, and sometimes dread social occasions.  But I must say when I do go out I have a lot of fun, laugh and really enjoy myself, and I'm drug free.  I work out 3 times a week, as I've gained weight too.  It's brutal to walk out the door, but when I come home I have this natural high from cardio/weight training.  So, I see the light at the end of the tunnel, but I'm not quite there yet.

I want me back too.  I'm hanging in there, and love to read others post regarding their journey.  It really helps me.

Thanks for sharing your story.

Megan

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 08, 2014
well, here I am , a year later after a few posts on here and of course failed attempts to quit. I have got to get off this drug, and now well, its no longer avail to me online so thats a plus.I have so much going on right now and am so scared that I will not be able to carry on and do the things that have to be done. I ran out of tram  one time before a year or so ago , for a few days and I remember it being horrible. I am better prepared now than before , i have some benzos and supplements and have done research. But it is still scary

Avatar_f_tn
by serenenow, Jun 11, 2014
Grateful to be where I am at today.  Don't lose hope.  It is possible to get clean and stay clean.  Have a blessed day.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jun 13, 2014
3 months clean, and 5 lbs heavier.  I'll take the weight gain over the addiction of tramadol.  Prayfully I'll never go back, as the withdrawals almost killed me.  That is what keeps me from going back on.  I feel pretty normal, and from what I read each day gets better.  The support group I was going to we are to say "today I'm not going to use", that got me through the first couple of months that were so hard.  

Yes, don't lose hope, you can get and stay clean.

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 14, 2014
Hello all. I was here a couple of years ago but couldn't remember my log-in information. I was unsuccessful at quitting the tramadol after trying cold turkey a few times. My normal daily intake of tramadol was the upper 400 mg a day. The last time I quit, I was able to do it and have been off tramadol for six months now. I have gotten a better handle on my physical pain so I believe I'm off for good. This time I did withdrawal without suffering the physical discomfort. So I wanted to share how. I have read this does not work for everyone, but thought it might help someone. This last time, before I discontinued the tramadol, I got a couple of bottles of loperamide (Imodium) in the 2 mg caplet form.

The first day I planned to discontinue the tramadol, I took my normal 2 50 mg tramadol pills in the morning. Four hours later, I took 12 loperamide. Four hours after that, I took 12 more imodium. At bedtime I took 12 more. The next day I took 10 loperamide morning, mid-day and night. The third day I took 8 loperamide morning, mid-day and night. The fourth day, I took nothing and from then on was fine. At no point did I suffer withdrawal symptoms. Each day I took two doses of Metamucil capsules (2 for each dose) and my bowels didn't even block up. I feel that I got off easy using the loperamide method,, and I'm not even tempted to use tramadol again. BUT: if you follow a plan involving loperamide, you have to make sure to drink lots of water and use the Metamucil or heavy duty stool softeners. Don't take it more than a few days - you really don't have to, and some people become dependent on loperamide, so just don't go there.

I've been able to manage my pain with taking some Vanquish when it gets bad. I'm thinking at some point the tramadol was actually making me more sensitive to pain. I love that my mind is so much clearer! You don't even realize how foggy you are until the tramadol is out of your system. I have not even had the brain zaps or PAWS after using this loperamide method, and I have no idea if that's typical or not. I don't understand the science, I only know this is what worked for me.

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 14, 2014
That is interesting, I tried the lope just the other day as a trial, when I got up I didnt take any tram - i took 8 lope - mid day i took 6 more - took a while for it to kick in but most symptoms were mild - I did have somewhat of a belly ache from the lope I think. It did not stop the RLS at all - it was a miserable night and somewhere in the middle I broke and took 2 tramm so I could sleep. Maybe my lope doses were too small idk. But I have heard of it working quite well. My my plan now is to taper down to 1 pill a day over the next 2 weeks then I have 6 days off. I will have to suffer through it then and this time I have to overcome. I will not do this any more. On that last day I will flush any remaining and will have no way to get more so ill have no choice.

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 14, 2014
I think it just has to do with individual body chemistry. ..I feel lucky that it worked for me. I was never able to taper.If the loperamide gave you a stomach ache, you're right not to try more. . .you could get an even worse problem. Sounds like you are determined enough for your taper to work. Big hugs going out to you. . .you can and will do this.

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 16, 2014
well, now i find out that I will be having summer exams during the days immediately following my planned last taper days. There is no way i can take midterms during the first week of full on withdrawls. If i wait six weeks til the semester is over i can have 11 days off school and work to lay in bed. I dont want to go back on saying im quitting on the 26th of this month but I dont see how I can now. I know how bad my rls is when i have tried to quit before - there is no way I would be able to study or concentrate on an exam. This tramm habit i will kick, i quit smoking 3 years ago cold turkey after 20 years at 2 packs a day. I know I can do it its just a matter of timing. I guess I am just looking for advice from the ones who have been there and done that if you know what I mean. I dont want to continue but in the grand scheme, 6 weeks isnt that long...I cant fail out of school

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 17, 2014
How I hate this drug - i wish i could just go to  the cabin in the woods away from all responsibilities and do my detox without worry of everyday life responsibilities. I wish I knew how long the physical symptoms would last - Ive never made it 48 hours - its always been so bad. IDK - I have to get it done though.

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 17, 2014
Well, I guess its a slow spot on the forum. Anyway, gonna put it out there. I have re evaluated everything and have arranged 7 days off work and everything starting july the 7th. July the 6th is my last day on these things, come hell or high water. I am gonna take the next couple weeks and gather all the supplies I can based on what I have read , and mentally prepare myself for it. And thats just the way it is. And that is just the way it will be. SO , heres to  the upcoming sleepless nights and cries for help. And heres to no more of this **** bag drug being a part of my life.

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 18, 2014
If you are going to do it cold turkey, you are doing the right thing to plan the time off. See if you can get some zolpidem beforehand too, then you'll be able to sleep. If you can't sleep, you're more likely to cave. You'll do it, but you do need the time off.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jun 19, 2014
Yes if you do cold turkey you will need a sleeping aid.  If not, you probably won't sleep for several nights, and be tempted to get more tram.  I don't know how long you've been taking the drug.  I was on it 5 years, 500 mgs a day and it took me 2 weeks to feel somewhat better.  I'm 80 days off the evil drug, and part of me would like to go back.  BUT, I won't because the detox was very tough on me, which makes me never want to go back on.  I take Neurontin for anxiety, and 10 mgs of Prozac.  Also make yourself go on a walk everyday, even it's 5 to 10 minutes, it helps.

Good luck to you, and hope you continue to post your progress.

Avatar_m_tn
by thestilly, Jun 20, 2014
Ditch - I quit trammies two different times.  The first time I just was fed up and did a very fast taper.  I was successful but about 9 months later started taking them again.  The last time I quit I did it a bit differently.  I did a relatively fast taper again but I planned it out as you have.  I also started making the changes to my lifestyle 2-3 weeks before I tapered.  This helped me immensely the second time.  Some of the supplements people list here that have helped them take some time to maixmize their benefits in your body.  Start them now so that when you quit they are already helping.  Same with diet and excersice.  Starting now might really help you get through this fight.

Battle on!

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 20, 2014
Thank you both for your support. I have gathered some things, I am working on the rx sleeping aid, the no sleep and rls have broken me both times ive tried to quit, within 48 hrs. It is the most horrible part for me. I went ahead and ordered the withdrawl aid, simply because it seems , or is supposed to contain all the things plus a few, in the thomas recipe and others that have been suggested. I was planning on starting them the week before , then I would have a 3 week supply after I quit, then could adjust accordingly. I have been on the tram less than 2 years, this nov will be 2 years. A steady daily dose is 200 mg. I know that seems low in comparison to what some people take. I as well have a good supply of zofran for nausea and flexeril (muscle relaxer) and liquid immodium. So, idk, I am gonna be off that week so Ill just plan on staying up if I have too but I hope with the meds and supplements I can at least sleep some. I can deal with the daytime ok, its the nightime that gets me.

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 20, 2014
Keep coming on here, we'll be here to talk to. Hugs.

1926359_tn?1331591739
by lulu747, Jun 20, 2014
Hey Guys-
Lu here- Not a Tramadol addict but an opiate addict in recovery.  I have a very close friend (my best friend) who has been on Tramadol for nearly a decade after a car accident.  She knows she doesn't need the pills anymore for the pain and wants to taper off.  Every time she tries her w/d's are awful.  I myself went cold turkey off a huge dose of oxy and it was hellish but I was fine and healed after a couple of months.  I know this is not the case with Tramadol due to the synthetic nature and the SSNRI component.  I told her to set up a taper plan with her doc- but her doc is gone and the replacement does not believe that Tramadol is addictive and she should JUST STOP. I believe her dose is 50 mg/8 a day- so 400 mg total. I know from all I've read on here that this is not the case, and I really want my friend to recover in a healthy way and not put herself through hell.  After reading through all of your posts I am going to recommend her to come here and talk with y'all.  I hope the stories don't scare the sh*t out of her and keep her using.  I know she has to stop because she's ready to, and there is nothing I can do but lend support.
I wanted to tell you all that I have the upmost respect for you and your journey's.  What a terrible drug Tram is.  I am so grateful that when it was prescribed to me I only lasted on it for two weeks, it made me depressed.

Anyways, thank you for sharing.  I hope my friend will come here soon and receive the love and wisdom that you all have to offer.
Much love and respect....
Lu

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jun 21, 2014
Ditch - from what I've learned is you are on a low dose of tram, and only been on two years.  You sound like you have the right meds to help you as you go 'cold turkey' from this drug.  You might have a better and faster recovery than most of us.  I was on for 5 years and got up to 500 mgs a day.  I'm almost 90 days out, and just starting to feel normal.  Everyone is different.  Mornings are the hardest, and I have a sugar free monster drink.  I tell myself it's better than tramadol.  I've been seeing a psychiatrist and he put me on a low dose of Prozac, and told me based upon the years and dose I was taking of tram it would take up to 6 months to return to my normal self.  I'm half way there.  Prozac has really helped with anxiety.
Like I said in my other posts some type of exercising helps, and continue to eat even if you aren't hungry,  the only thing I could keep down was Cheerios.

Lu - I hope your friend reads the posts and it doesn't scare her too much.  Would be happy to communicate with her, like many on this thread.  

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 24, 2014
I don't know if anyone else who has withdrawn feels this way, but I always do. I am drop dead paranoid of falling and suffering the extreme chance of injury (I have a lot of metal in my back.) And then I won't have any pain pills. It's been almost ten years since my surgery, and I have always been able to catch myself (but I sure do trip a lot, lol.) People must wonder why I spend every walk staring at my feet.

Avatar_m_tn
by mrmeaty, Jun 24, 2014
Hi everyone!  I was an abuser for 10+ years and found the strength 2 years ago to get off.  I was taking approx 16 pills a day and did very slow taper and had no withdrawal symptoms.  Well after 2 years I fell off the wagon.  Typical addict mentality of thinking I could just do a few here or there.  Unfortunately here I am 4 months later trying to taper off again.  I am now 24 hours into my detox and feel ok except for dizziness.  Keeping my fingers crossed that this will be the worst of it!!

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 24, 2014
It happens because we don't properly take care of the reasons why we take them. For me, it's physical pain but is different for everyone. You can do it. You know you can because you have. Thank God for Emily keeping up this journal. By the way, who is Mr. Meaty? Sounds like a cartoon character maybe?

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 24, 2014
Well, I have all I think has been suggested, most of it anyway. So, now I just wait until July the 7th. tick tock tick tock

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 24, 2014
You will be fine . . .and just wait till the day you wake up and your head is clear. It's going to be amazing!

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jun 25, 2014
How long have you been off tram?

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 25, 2014
I have been for about six months. . .and trying to  work on my pain right now  through natural means so I don't cave. Hoping it works. OffTram4Good is a hopeful nickname.


Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jun 25, 2014
It's a great name.  I saw my psychiatrist today, and he thought I looked a lot better than a month ago.  I'm 90 days out, and feel better, but not 100%.  So hoping in another month I will feel even better.

Detox for me was worse than child birth.  I can't imagine going through it again.  I would love the energy tram gave me, but it's not worth the cost, as I kept popping pills, 500 mgs a day.  It's a fake high.  

Congrats on being off for 6 months.  Others on this board have said 6 months seems to be the magical milestone when you are 100% back to who you were before tram.

I must admit I feel pretty darn good at 3 months off.

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 26, 2014
Good! You will feel better and better. I'm taking my DLPA, just started that, cutting my coffee, and protein loading, everything I can do to get the serotonin and endorphins flowing again naturally. I read all I can about that. Hardest thing for me is making myself exercise, because I do hurt. Usually I just sit here and jiggle my legs, lol. I tried kratom yesterday and it worked like a charm on the pain, but nauseating and pricey. Otherwise it would be nice, because it removed my pain without making me "high."  A once in awhile thing. No magic bullet for the pain that doesn't come at too high a price one way or another.

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 27, 2014
So. . .yesterday I took 3 g kratom with two naproxen (Aleve.) Half the amount and on a full stomach this time, so suffered no nausea at all. That combination worked great on my pain for almost 8 full hours, and that is a minimal amount of kratom. That I will take a couple of times a week in order to function better on days when I'm vaccuuming and activities like that which cause me so much pain. Should be a great aid in keeping me from wanting the trams again on days of great pain.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jun 27, 2014
Where do you purchase kratom ?  Health food store ?

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 27, 2014
I got it online at a store that a friend recommended. Careful with it if you try it. It is related to the coffee plant and is addictive, not an every day thing to do. I even have my coffee down to a minimum now, lol, I don't want the coffee withdrawal headache at this point in my "career."

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jun 27, 2014
well, started the supplements today to try and build it all up in my system , got about 9 days till q day. I figure that should give it enough time to reach whatever therapeutic level its going to. i hope anyway

9273731_tn?1402779179
by OffTram4Good, Jun 28, 2014
You'll be good. The supplements should help. We'll be here.

Avatar_m_tn
by MBFT, Jul 05, 2014
I have severe fibromyalgia and the the complete gambit of co-morbid "issues" (I don't wish to call them diseases or give the entirety of my symptoms more power as I am currently disabled and fighting with all my will.). I also have one disc in my mid thoracic that is pinching my spine pretty severely and still have to wait 6 more months for medicare. I suspect a micro laser discectomy will be preformed. I have spent eight months on "trauma-doll". The first 2 months I was prescribed 8X 50 mgs per day right away. Then the doc dropped me to 6X 50 mgs for six months. In the last month or so I noticed it not working very well, keeping me even less functional and causing even more severe fibro mood swings. My sister unfortunately has stolen some of my tramadol and clonazepam in the past. The combination of these two factors made me extremely angry and wanting to get off of as many of these meds as possible. Even my extreme pain and discomfort have become more bearable than stolen medication, lies, and mis-informed doctors. So about two and a half weeks ago I stopped cold turkey for a day, 24 hours later a massive wave of issues came over me including a fairly long and powerful seizure. So I went back on tramadol for a week @4 X 50 mg. I waited about three days and attempted the same. Again the same gambit but I returned back to 3 a day instead of four, next few days I forced myself down to 2 and then 2 days at 1X 50. Now I've been off of it for about 5 days. I felt pretty good suddenly and also reduced my lyrica dose and dropped baclofen cold turkey without much ado. I'm using immodium just a few times but haven't had to use it much at all. I am not sleeping. but because I do not respond to antidepressants and have been practically force fed nearly everyone of them that I can think of, coming off medication and dealing with transient insomnia is another normal day for me. What I am concerned about is my eyes burning and going back and forth between feeling fairly fine and tearing up to burning itching dryness and back. I can deal with the resurgence of depression and anxiety levels, I can even deal with the pain for now. But this issue with my eyes burning has got me fairly concerned. I noticed more than a year ago when I just skimmed this forum that someone else had similar issues. Without reading everything here, can anyone tell me if this will pass or if I need artificial eye drops or something along those lines? BTW I have a full RX of tram right on my night stand and each time I look at it, I get this anger welling up inside me and disgust. It's been my go to technique for conquering dependency as the doctors continue to give me drugs that cause serious dependence without testing nor concern. Once I'm fully stable and see my doc on the 29th I'm going to give the full bottle to him and suggest he try withdrawal for a while. It makes me beyond angry. But the anger for now is motivating. I'm currently still taking clonazepam 3mgs, and lyrica 450 mgs per day. I plan to drop the clonazepam next and am prepared for a much much longer ordeal with than since I've been on it for about 6 years now. This may not be condoned by the forum, but I will admit that a friend asked me to try an "alternative" medication that only 22 states currently allow for a week in very small quantities to see if it might work. It far beyond eclipses all of the other medications combined. I'm planning the long road to severing ties with the pharmaceutical industry and moving to a "compassionate state" that offers this medication for which I apparently would qualify for very quickly. I hate these chains we have to wear and I'd rather take my chances with something far more natural even if it's not completely proven yet after the hell I've been in for the last ten years. So that's me. But I am freaking out about my eyes! Any help?

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 05, 2014
@MBFT

I had the burning eyes thing.  Wasn't sure what it was at the time, but it drove me crazy.  I thought it was just from staring at the computer, but I didn't have it before quitting tram and do not have it now.  I used eye drops the Dr gave me, but I think it is something you can get at Walgreen's etc.  Not visine but something for dry eye.

I had a lot of eye problems at first.  I had a lot of floaters and blurry vision.  I would see flashes in the corners of my eyes when I closed them and moved them side to side. Chronic dry burning eyes. Was so stressed out and finally broke down and went to the eye Dr thinking my eyes were seriously damaged.  Nope!  Perfectly normal with outstanding vision for a 40 yr old.  He didn't even think I needed glasses.  I asked about the tram withdrawals causing eye problems and he said it was possible, but they cannot see it because it is happening in the brain, not the eyes. This is mostly from the antidepressant aspect of the drug which closely resembles Effexor in chemical makeup.

You can search for "antidepressant withdrawal dry eyes" and see many people complain about this as a symptom.

My eyes are doing much better!  I think the worst part was the first 6 months and then things slowly got back to normal.  I would only get the weird vision symptoms during a bad wave of the "windows and waves" pattern of recovery.

All my best!!



Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 05, 2014
and I just wanted to see my ticker!

yay!!!

Avatar_m_tn
by MBFT, Jul 05, 2014
Oh you are awesome! Thank you so very much. I never thought about the anti-depressant like qualities being the culprit. We live and learn. Clean for 6 days and have no desire to go back. Woot! And high five to you allinblack on 482 days clean! Thank you again, very much appreciated.

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 06, 2014
@MBFT

You are most welcome!  If you do continue to have issues with your eyes, please don't hesitate to see an eye Dr for a checkup.. just in case.  I would hate if you did miss something that was wrong because of my experience.  With that being said, I did see a lot of people complaining about vision and eye issues in many of the antidepressant withdrawal forums.

I think the SNRI aspect of the drug is what  really, really got me.  I have never been able to tolerate antidepressants and I unknowingly was prescribed this for years and didn't know until I did some investigating when I could no longer tolerate the med. I was furious and that is why I wanted to quit.  I have never had a problem with opiate based drugs and never felt an addictive urge for them. I can even take a Vicodin now and again with no issues.  The only reason I kept on the tramadol is because if I stopped taking it I felt horrible. I thought my fibromyalgia was coming back with a vengeance... and even the Dr told me it was that.  funny how I don't feel that awfully any more.  Still have my issues but nowhere near the pain of withdrawal.

The worst part of this withdrawal experience for me was the PAWS.. or post acute withdrawal that was bad off and on for 6-8 months.  I never thought those brain zaps would go away!  Those are awful.  The the vision problems and the weird hypersensitive nervous system.  All antidepressant withdrawal symptom related as far as I am concerned.

I don't think many people will have the withdrawal symptoms I have had though.  My brain  was already wired strangely.  I have always been extremely neurologically "sensitive" and did have some anxiety and nervous problems beforehand.  I do not think my brain liked being flooded with the mind altering chemicals for 10 years.  

This whole experience has made me a stronger person in many ways.  I really now understand mind of matter and the plasticity of the brain.. and how we create our own realities in a sense.  It has really given me the strength to fight the anxiety and negative thinking HEAD ON!

If symptoms seem to linger on for a while for anyone, please consider the AD withdrawal aspect.  You can check forums and postings for symptoms that you may not see here. You may have a sensitive brain.  This is the evil of this drug.  Two awful substances in one tiny pill.

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 07, 2014
well, the day has arrived and I am nervous and not looking forward to it but it is time. I took my last dose this am about 30 min ago, so my 24 hour mark when historically my bad symptoms start , would not be at bedtime tonight. I have to say though, for the past 9 days I have been taking the withdrawl aid supplement to build it up in my system. the day before yesterday I took a pill at 3pm and didnt take another till the next day at 10 am. symptoms were very very mild to say the least. So...I have high hopes that the supplement will at least help some. I have my benzos and zofran ready to go for the night time, and today marks day one of a week off work. So , here we go I guess, gonna go about my business for the day

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 07, 2014
And a new tracker

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 07, 2014
Day 10 will I ever get better,28 months using, doing 15 a day some days, feel like ive ruined my life, anxiety rearly bad, psychiatrist thinks its post traumatic stress disorder,had bad car crash 30 years ago,advice please

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 07, 2014
Day 10 will I ever get better,28 months using, doing 15 a day some days, feel like ive ruined my life, anxiety rearly bad, psychiatrist thinks its post traumatic stress disorder,had bad car crash 30 years ago,advice please

Avatar_m_tn
by rednik, Jul 07, 2014
Been lurking for a bit and thought I would setup an account.  Been using Tramadol for around 4 years, the most I have taken is 800mg.  I have been tapering for about a month now and am down to 200mg per/day.  Good luck to everyone trying to quit.  It has been my experience that a gradual reduction has worked the best for me.

Also I have a question what dosage do people jump off at?  I want to get to .25mg before I do, but I am curious as to what others are doing.?

Thanks



Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 07, 2014
@rednik

I tapered down to .25 a day and I just couldn't go any lower than that... even taking .25 twice a day I was still having some withdrawal.  But the .25 was like taking nothing at all.  I tapered slowly too.  I just decided to jump.  I felt I was prolonging the suffering trying to keep going at .25.  I'm glad I did... I couldn't take it any more.  Other people have had different amounts but i think I've read most got to a taper amount that just didn't cut it.  The taper is supposed to be very slow.

@blockhead123
Yes, it will get easier and better!  I've seen people take as much if not more than this for a longer time and have pulled through.  Please read the archives for the last couple of years.  Initial withdrawal is hard and you have gotten through the worst of it.  The next few months you will have some weird symptoms off an on and the anxiety is a B****.  I thought i was losing my mind. This medicine alters your brain... it has to fix itself.  It doesn't happen just because the drug is out of your system.  Much like any injury, healing takes time.  You are going to find out a lot about yourself in this time.  Use this to your advantage.  You will realize your strengths.  It will force you to face any issues you had even before you took the drug.  Use this to your advantage.  I am somewhat of a different person now... for the better.  I was forced to deal with many things the drug made me forget.  Just hang in there and keep reading the archives.  You will find a lot of familiarity.  Also, really focus on how our minds create our own realities.  This was my best weapon when I felt the drugs claws still anchored into my brain.  Sometimes you just have to lay low when it get's rough... and that's ok.  Just ride it out.  One day at a time.  I never thought I would be where I am today.  I am here..... and I am talking to you because I know where you are.

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 08, 2014
Thank you, feel like I need to be on a psychiatric ward, just wish id never took this poison

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 08, 2014
Well, theres one day in the books..so far im ok but i just hit the first 24 hr mark this am so we will see what the day brings. I am having fewer symptoms than I thought I would but not counting my chickens just yet. I do know that in past attempts by the 24 hr mark i was a mess. what i have done different this time, well. have been taking the withdrawl aid supplement for a week prior to quitting, i dont know but it had everything in it that everyone talks about to use when quitting, so i just bought it. I started taking slightly larger doses of zofran yesterday every 5 hours. I had read and researched that tests were done saying zofran not only helped with nausea but blocked or reduced the opiate withdrawl symptoms. I couldnt find anything really recent on that but figured what the hay. I was feeling somewhat anxious before bedtime last night, I took versed before bed and slept till 430 am - took versed again and slept till 830 am. I got up and took my supplement and zofran and showered. and now here i am. I took a five hour energy , so we will see about that. The only thing i am experiencing now that i havent before is an apparent increase in sneezing. idk what thats about. Im off work for the week so ill try and get some studying done and work around the house a bit as long as i can. will check in later on, i only hope i stay this "ok"

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 08, 2014
@ditch

The sneezing thing is normal.  Happens the first few days.  Just take it hour by hour and ride it out.  I think the really bad part is over in 3 or 4 days... then begins the healing.  We all wish you the best.

@blockhead123

You may feel like you need to be in a ward for a short while.  I realized that any depression or anxiety I had before was nothing compared to early withdrawal.  I just had to remind myself it wasn't real and this wasn't me.  Keep yourself distracted and do not start the obsessive symptom thinking.  Get out and take a walk if you can.  Play games online etc.  Puzzle games are great. This is important. You really have to keep your mind busy.  You will be ok.  This part will end.  Stay strong!

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 08, 2014
Yes sneezing is very normal for at least 10 days or so.  Boy I wish I did the supplements before quitting tramadol.  Sounds like you are doing pretty well.

Comments about keeping your mind busy is very important for recovery, along with physical activity.  I found when I have a social day and have conversations with many people and take a 30 minute walk I feel so good, compared to being quiet most of the day.

I still have good and bad days.  Hardest for me are mornings, as I'm tired and use to the 'awake, high' I had when taking this evil drug.

I'm not going back either.  I'm very encouraged by everyone, and sounds like it can take 6 months or so until I'm a better me.


Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 08, 2014
Thank you all for posting, Yeah the sneezing is annoying for sure - I feel a little under the weather but I have some things to try and get out and do , so thats where im headed, hopefully thatll keep me occupied - been laying in the bed doing school work all morning and starting to not feel super - gonna get up and get moving , see if that helps

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 08, 2014
Someone posted on an older thread that sneezing is very normal and good as your body is ridding itself of toxins and your normal sinuses are kicking in if that makes sense.

Good to hear you were able to sleep last night.  Zophran really helps with the stomach issues,and sounds like you are taking the right meds to make the detox process easier.

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 08, 2014
@allinblack  cheers

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 09, 2014
well, the later part of the day today was a bit rougher than earlier - still not as horrible as i had expected or have been in the past on attempts to quit. I have had a nagging nausea all day that gets worse and then better then worse then a little better. oddly seems better if i eat something. I have been taking zofran as well and sipping pepto.  started having some restless leg a couple hours ago , i took a zofran and my night time supplement and it seems to have subsided mostly but still there a bit. I have just taken my benzos so waiting for those to kick in and put me out for the night I hope. I waited til late to take them. anyway, tomorrow morning at 8 is 48 hours so heres praying for a decent night and a good day tomorrow. **** bag drug.

1106880_tn?1260898678
by wantmyselfback, Jul 09, 2014
It's hard to believe it's been 4 years off Tramadol!  A friend of mine was just discussing how he was taking tramadol for three months for back pain and described how when he went off of it he had terrible withdrawals.  It brought back many memories, which led me here to post again.  It's funny how once you get off of it, you never want to pick that drug up again.  I can't believe doctors are still prescribing this medication as a "safe-alternative" to narcotic pain medication.  To be honest, I think w/d'ing from Percocet or even OxyContin is nowhere near as bad as Tramadol w/d.  Just know it can be done.  I suffered absolute hell going through my withdrawal back in 2010.  

One thing I would do differently to help with the Restless Legs and Tossing and Turning as well as the overall withdrawal symptoms would be to take Immodium AD.  I came across an interesting website in which many people suffering withdrawals from opiates took Immodium to ease the withdrawal pain.  I had to do it about three months ago while getting off of Percocet (yes, I actually went back to percocet rather than take tramadol).  Just search "Immodium for Opiate Withdrawal" on Google and you will be surprised on how many people it has helped.  Dosage varies, but 20 Milligrams (10 pills) every 6 hours followed by a taper over four days should really help all of you going through the Tramadol W/D hell.  The main ingredient in Immodium is Loperamide, which believe it or not is actually an opiate, but doesn't cross the Blood Brain Barrier (so you can't get an intoxicating high from it).  By using Immodium, you can ease the withdrawal effects so much more than cold turkeying it like I did four years ago.  It's safe.  Just search around on the internet (since this won't let me post a website).

Wishing you all lots of love and luck.  You can do it.  4 years off tramadol and not looking back! :)

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 09, 2014
@ditch

Congrats!  You really are almost through the worst of it.  My worst was the first two days and then midway through day 3 I suddenly felt like I could get up out of bed.  I think that was the opiate part of the withdrawal ending.  Then  I just had to deal with getting my brain back in order and deal with my fibromyalgia without meds.

Yes, it is a bad drug!  I am so mad that I was never informed of the antidepressant aspect.  My Dr probably didn't know 10 years ago.  I think it should have been the responsibility of the drug manufacturer to let people know this.

They prescribe it so much now to almost everyone  I know... and no one realizes they are taking a mind altering substance.  This is NOT RIGHT!  People are unknowingly being given these thinking it's a standard pain pill... and some of us are taking a LOT.  This cannot be good. It can even be dangeous for some. People have a right to know.  I would have never taken this on a regular basis if I would have know all the details.  My dr told me it was a safe alternative to opitates.  I even investigated online... but at that time there was no info on the SNRI aspect.  They just said they didn't know how it worked... then years later they slowly let us in on the secret and I saw the new side effects and drug interactions lists on my pharmacy pamphlet grow and grow. Have you looked at this information lately?  it's ridiculous

I'm sorry I keep bringing up the AD aspect everyone.. I am just so angry.  I just had one of the hardest years of my life because of the lack of information.  At least there were some good things that came out of it.... I really learned a lot about myself and was forced to face things I would not have otherwise.  I have grown and I feel like a better person for it.


XoXO

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 09, 2014
@wantmyselfback.

Congrats!!  I totally agree... I would much rather withdraw from opiates any day!

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 09, 2014
allinblack -

I'm 99 days clean, yah !!!  I must admit it was worse than hell.  I still get depressed and tired through the day, and wonder when that goes away.  I was on tram for 4 years, progressed to 700 mgs a day.  I gained 10 lbs and have lost 5 of them.  I don't have my energy back yet, however when I work out I feel better, but much weaker than before.

I still feel I have these droopy eyes at times.  Sometimes I think I'm at the point where I want that high back, however what keeps me from starting again is the agonizing detox I went through.  From older posts I read it can take up to 6 months to a year to get your old self or better self back.  I'm hoping it's sooner than later.  So hard !!

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 09, 2014
I read on older posts that tramadol purchased over the internet may have pcp or other stuff in it.  I was one that did this some of the time, and wonder if my PAWS are due to this.

Anyone know?

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 09, 2014
Havent posted yet today, I did manage to fall asleep last night with the help of the things I took. It took awhile but i slept from 130 till 530 then till about 830. I got up , showered and took my supplement, and even though i didnt feel like it i went out and did yard work and worked outside from about 1030 am until now. I am exhausted. I havent had as bad of nausea today, still sneezing a bit. In fact when I woke up I felt really good. That good feeling went away quickly after getting up , I havent felt horrible, just not well, if you know what i mean. dragging, forcing myself to go and do. time for a shower and to see what happens next. I hope tommorow is much better. But i have to say, i feel as if i have gotten off easy so far, given my previous attempts to quit, but this time its gonna stick

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 09, 2014
I feel uncomfortable in my skin

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 10, 2014
Ditch -

All normal when detoxing from tram.  Hate to say this, day 3 and 4 can be worse, then it gets better.  You seem to be doing everything right.  Getting outside for fresh air, and doing something helps too.  However you need to rest and let your body heal.  Baby yourself, you are going through detox and it *****.  I remember it all too well.  You mentioned you feel better when you eat, that really helps with nausea.  Try to eat small meals all day long.

Congratulations on quitting this evil drug.  You did it !!!   You may feel you'll never get through it, but you will.  I spent days reading prior posts, room 52 and on.  I can't tell you how much I learned about myself thru these posts and the reason tramadol kicks your butt thru detox.  

Good luck, and keep posting.

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 10, 2014
@Meganann123 - thank you for the posts.

after that post last night it got the worse it has been so far - that was technically half way through day 3. I got soooo squirmy and uncomfortable that I couldn't stand to sit or lay down or live basically. It was horrible. Hopped in the bath 3 times in an hour. I took as much benzo as i dared and finally went to sleep - i woke up in a haze about midnght or so (2 hours later) and took a bit more. I went back to sleep and slept until 830 am thank God. I woke feeling awesome, I felt as if nothing was the matter. But shortly after I felt the fatigue start in, got up and showered, took my supplement, a 5 hour energy, the i went shopping for some things I needed for the house. I am back now and so far I feel ok, not great but i think defiantly better than yesterday - just sluggish - very very sluggish. I feel my legs abit as i am sitting here writing this but its not bad, ill take it a bit easier today than yesterday, i think i may have overdone it a bit and made it worse , idk. I do know however that I am off the Trammadol :)) and to that I say yay me cause im not going back. I wonder if a year from now someone will read about my experience as I have read so many others.....I also know that if i hadn't been able to plan this attempt out, i would not have gotten this far. If I didnt have a way to overcome the sleep issue, i probably would have folded. The sleep is what drove me back the previous two times I tried to quit. Anyway, I pray everyday gets better from this day forward. I am working through day 4 now, tomorrow marks the start of day 5, I hope this evening is not like last night, but I will let you know.........love to all of you out there who have struggled or are struggling with this drug

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 10, 2014
You know , its crazy to think that this drug and its constant barrage of chemicals can make us lose sight of who we are. I am by no means out of the woods but I have to say, over all i have felt very good today. slight depression and sluggishness but nothing too bad. better than yesterday. The funny thing is I do now, even 31/2 days out, remember who I was before this stupid pill. I was a happy person, in fact, when I started taking this pill things were going good for me, (I wont get into the reasons i started on this drug) On this pill I became a monotone, no good no bad person. I couldn't enjoy anything enjoyable because it was just one day just the same as the rest kinda attitude.I wasted so much money on crap that I didn't need, not to mention ordering that stupid drug.  I play guitar, love it, haven't really "played" in a year and a half, never enjoyed it. Today I had music on, a new song came on and I picked up my guitar and played and loved it again. I actually cried because I realized the emotions that playing music gave me had been taken away and were now rushing back. AMAZING. I have high hopes for this evening and for tonight and tomorrow. If I feel even better tomorrow then that will be amazing. I will say this and again, I am only 31/2 days out , I haven't had the same symptoms this time that I had the last two times. The differences this time in my cold turkey quitting is as follows. I planned the time off, it took a month and a half to get here, I kept taking the pill till the right time came and i committed to the date. I stocked up on zofran, its easy to get from a doc in a box for nausea or your primary care. I ordered "withdrawal" aid day and night supplement" and I started taking it 9 days before my quit date. I have got to say that I honestly believe it has made a big difference this time and would recommend it highly. I did manage to secure enough benzos and a strong one at that, to help with sleep. I know everyone cannot do that last one, get something, Valium, lunesta, ambien something. The ability to sleep is the kicker for sure. I am not trying to sound like I know it all because trust me I have learned that I do not. My last two attempts were miserable. I hope that anyone out there thinking about quitting will plan it out and do it, I can see now that it is worth it . Ive had the blues some today but I know why....it will get better and it is possible to quit.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 10, 2014
Ditch

Yes, the ability to sleep is the key.  I went into detox not knowing anything.  I thought I was going to die.  I didn't sleep for 3 days, and it took 2 weeks before I slept 6 to 8 hours.  I was weak, nauseous, vomiting, headaches, anxious, depressed and angry and my legs hurt badly.  It was horrible.....I didn't know about this forum because if I did I would have stocked up on the meds you listed and planned it out better.   I lost weight initially, then craved sugar and carbs like crazy and gained 10 lbs, but have gotten most of it off.

I'm taking 5-HTD supplement.  It's a chemical compound that is naturally produced in your body as it makes serotonin, which regulates your mood.  I read on earlier posts that it helps with depression and anxiety.  You can buy it on amazon or health food store.  It really helped me.  If interested, google for more info.

Since you are able to sleep these early days of detox, your sleeping will only improve as you go forward.

Keep going !   One day at a time !!!!!!

This forum kept me from getting back on that killer drug.  

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 10, 2014
Had a little bout of rls again a bit ago, seems to be subsiding idk. went ahead and took my night time meds, so hopefully they kick in and I can sleep again tonight...until then, or maybe sooner....

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 11, 2014
made it through day 4, working on 5. Had the same symptoms late in the evening yesterday , rls, squirmy skin all over, but not as bad as the day before. I did manage to sleep some last night but woke up several times. Now there is no reason to go back , i believe the worst may be over as far as the physical pain and discomfort. Lets hope so anyway,I can say I am defiantly glad that I took the time off work to do the first 7 days of detox anyway. I look back at this past monday and it seems so far away ...still having the occasional sneezing attacks but not too bad. anyway , just saying hello to all on here and to those lurking about and reading, I hope that you will post, id like to talk to you and offer my support...peace -

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 11, 2014
Good for you Ditch !!!!  

You should be through the worse of the physical detox.  Congratulations !!!!  Hopefully you will be a ittle better tomorrow, and by Monday even better.  Just think you are 4 almost 5 days clean, great accomplishment.

Ive been reading the boards back in 2010/2011, and wherever you are in your recovery ( ticker date ), you will find someone who has been through the same time period.  I found it comforting to read while I continue to get healthy.

Nest news you are no longer taking the evil drug :))

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 11, 2014
Oops 'Best'

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 11, 2014
Yes, that is the best news. Today has been good. I feel ok tonight so far and that is good , my mind is sharper already, i can tell a difference. I think the physical stuff is all but gone now. For anyone out there, i am approaching the dawn of day 5 and I tell you that it can be done and you can survive. I wouldn't wish it on anyone, but you can do it..i promise..just remember...A trying time is not a time to stop trying...D

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 12, 2014
5 days clean, last night was good, made it through the evening with very minor short bout of rls. I took a smaller benzo dose to sleep and did not wake to take another in the middle of the night. I will try to sleep tonight without them

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 13, 2014
@ditch

I am so happy for you!  You are really doing this!  I remember thinking it would never be possible for me to stop, but I DID it... and I am so happy that I did!!!!  I sometimes forget what an amazing and difficult thing I went through.  I know I am me again... imperfections and all

take care

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 13, 2014
@allinblack..thank you , it is an  awesome feeling now, I looked in the mirror earlier and just said..you did it....I didnt take any benzos last night , had insomnia most of the night ..wide *** awake but oh well. The only other thing I seem to have going on is the occasional "blurry" feeling and not super clear vision, but nothing major. I can realize when its happening and I know what its from. I am thankful that i had 7 days  off to break this chain and although it wasnt the vacation I was hoping for , I am glad to be on the other side of it and going back to work tommorow. My mind seems so much clearer during the day...what a blessing....

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 13, 2014
forgot the ticker....:)

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 14, 2014
-ditch,

It took me a couple of weeks before I could sleep more than 2 to 4 hours at a time.  I didn't have access to benzos, so was tired all day long.  I remember the feeling you are experiencing the joy of getting off tram.  I don't know how long and the amount you were taking but sounds like you are doing very well after a week.  I was on 500 mgs a day for 3 years .

Allinblack - I saw your ticker, at least 15 months clean !  Did you ever take 5-HTP for mood, and anxiety problems.  I just started taking it, and has given me more energy.  I did some research on it, and you can only take it for 3 months, and by then I will be 7 months out.  I know my brain in still healing, and like I've posted before my best days are when I get out and walk or exercise, and/or complete projects around the house.

Congrats again -ditch !!!!

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 14, 2014
@meganann123

I did not take anything at all.  I was on this medication for so many years that I wanted my brain to get back to its regular baseline to see what it was.  In retrospect, maybe  it would have helped.  I had those dang brain zaps so badly.  I had some Xanax around, but only took it on occasion.  Didn't want to get dependent on that stuff because that also has awful withdrawals.

At first I took nothing at all, as far as supplements, but after a while I did start taking magnesium, Bcomplex, fish oil and turmeric, vitamin C and vitamin D.  They have helped.  I can also drink caffeine again.  My nervous system was so raw at first.  I was way overstimulated by everything. I wore earplugs constantly.  I was already a hypersensitive person before tramadol, so I think that is why I took withdrawal so hard neurologically.  I had already taken other drugs for nerve pain before tram.  I seriously thought I had become bi-polar during those first few months.  I would have these weird ups and downs. I know it was the meds because I don't feel that way any more.  I feel so sorry for people who have real depression and real bi-polar type of things... I had my foot inside the door there for a short bit and it was not fun.  This forum helped me so much.

The exercise and walking are amazing.  The walks were hands down the best thing to help me.  

i am so tired of being "special", but at least I am now the special me that is not dependant on daily pills that give me awful side effects.  I love being able to laugh and feel happiness. I love not being a robot!

I sure hope @blockhead123 is ok.  Haven't heard from them and I know they were having a hard time.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 14, 2014
I can relate to the brain zaps.  I still get them.  Mornings are still tough, however when I go for a walk first thing in the morning I feel so much better that day.  Must be the natural endorphins compared to the fake ones on tram.  I still remember the high and how good I felt.  However like many have said, the tram turned on me and I was no longer the person I use to be.  Like you said, I was a robot too.  I also know for me I couldn't handle detox again.  That in itself keeps me from using. Plus I never ever have to count pills and figure a way to get more.  It's one day at a time and I keep my eyes focused forward and watch the days accumulate on my ticker.  A great feeling !!!

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 15, 2014
@allinblack 18 days today,got to say im feeling better every day, im moving house and the stress is immense, but it has got to be done, had my ups and downs, feel so knackered all the time,never going to take this poison again !!! Thanks for your concern :-)

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 15, 2014
@meganann123

So happy that I don't have to figure out how I am going to get my next bottle of pills when my Drs prescriptions weren't sue for refill yet.  I hated being a slave to that!  I feel so happy when I think of my freedom from that!!  I think there def comes a point when taking this med that you just want to be done with it.  I remember falling down on my knees and crying and praying for the Lord to help me get off of this... I wanted to so badly! Now, here I am!  It is a great feeling

@blockhead123

Good to hear from you!  You are doing so well.  18 days is amazing! You will keep feeling better and better....

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 15, 2014
time for bed, first two days of work since quitting done, I feel exhausted, going to bed now , but still tram free.....

9704730_tn?1405744884
by keek36, Jul 15, 2014
Has anyone here been on tramadol for more than 10 years at 400-800mg a day?  Can I really come off of this? I hate it. I ffeel like a prisoner to it!!!

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 16, 2014
@keek36, I may not be the best here to give advice as I have only been off for 9 days , but I will tell you that if you search through this journal you will find hours of reading about many people just like you. We all feel like a prisoner to that stupid *** pill. The problem with tramadol is that the sri properties are so fast acting and have such a short half life that you become enslaved to it. And it also gives a horrible withdrawl. When we get to that point, where the trammadol turns on us, then we usually are just taking it to avoid withdrawls.  Now, I will not lie..as evidence from the many posts on this forum, you can most defiantly quit..but it is not easy, in fact, probably the hardest thing ive ever done. But sooooo worth it at this point. I even at 9 days or so, i dont count pills, keep track of the time, have to always make sure I have my tram everywhere I go. What a blessing. Plenty of people on here to help. My advice to you is to plan it out, give yourself time to do it, you will need time off work. google the thomas recipe for opiate withdrawl. I looked at this forum for a year and a half before I was able to pull the trigger. But i know now I will never go back.Ever. Wishing for peace and inner strength for you and everyone else here....D

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 16, 2014
@keek36

I was on tram for 4 years, about the same dosage as you.   Like many have said the tramadol started to turn on me and started to need more and more to feel normal.  I became extremely depressed, anxious, and became a person I didn't recognize.  I thought I was going to die or be arrested as I bought some of the pills over the internet.  All the money I wasted !!
I went to an inpatient hospital detox, and even with the meds they gave me it was beyond horrible,  however I was mentally ready to quit.  Hardest thing I've EVER done and I'll never go back, as I couldn't go thru detox again.  I don't want to scare anyone, but for me that is what keeps me from using.  
This forum has helped me immensely.  I can relate to everything written, and gives me hope that I'll be back to normal, or a "new and better" normal soon.  
It's a rough, rocky road, and healing takes place through this journey.  It's so much better being off the tram.

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 16, 2014
Thought I was doing well at day 19 feel aweful,may aswell go back on the tablets if this is how life is going to be forever !!!!!!

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 16, 2014
@blockhead123

Life will not be awful forever.  I remember so well the first month of my recovery, and my body hurt all over, zero energy, terrible sleeping issues and feeling I had the constant flu forever.

It DOES get better, I promise.  There are supplements that others have posted in the last couple of weeks that have helped them through this process.  You made it to day 19.....great accomplishment !!!  I don't know if you work or not; you need to baby your body and give it time to heal.  

Keep posting, someone is always here to help.

9734245_tn?1405718139
by pinkgirl73, Jul 16, 2014
Hello, everyone.  I just need some advice.  I have been on tramadol for 10 years.  I have been at my current daily dose is between 10-14 pills, (500mg-700mg per day.)  I have a scrip from my doctor for 4 per day but when I couldn't manage my pain with that dosage after a few years I started to supplement by buying from online doctors, which is legal in my state.  Anyway as of 7-2-14 the DEA has classified tramadol as a schedule 4 controlled substance, which will take affect on 8-18-14.  The problem is that now I will no longer be able to buy them online because it will be illegal and so I need to taper from 10-14 per day down to my prescribed amount which is 4 per day, in a very short period of time.  I am stock piling them in order to have enough to hopefully do a 3 month taper which is still relatively fast but I don't have a choice.  Does anyone have a taper schedule for 3 months?  thank you so much.

9734245_tn?1405718139
by pinkgirl73, Jul 16, 2014
PS

I am actually more concerned about the psychological affects of tapering due to the SSRI properties more than I am about the physical withdrawal.  Thanks!


Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 17, 2014
@meganann I do hope so, thanks

Avatar_f_tn
by CT1978, Jul 17, 2014
I've been abusing tramadol for about 8 years (300-500mgs daily). I am trying to see DEA reclass as a blessing in disguise. Been reading many forums such as this one and feel like I can make a tapering off schedule and stick with it. Helpful to know there's others out there facing the same challenge.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 17, 2014
@CT1978

I also read where Tramadol is going to be a Class 3 ( I think ) drug on August 18, which means doctors can no longer call in prescription.  They finally realized this drug is very addictive, and not as safe as they once thought.  Duh !!!

Tapering off sounds like a good idea.  Being off tram feels really good, I'm no longer a prisoner, thank you God.  

9734245_tn?1405718139
by pinkgirl73, Jul 18, 2014
yes, they are going to schedule it as a class IV.  Same as Percocet.  Thankfully I received this info early enough to stockpile enough meds to do a 6 month taper.  For all of you out there who buy tramadol online, just try to get enough before the 18th to do a comfortable taper.  I know it seems scary but you can do it.

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 18, 2014
I know the rescheduling is probably scary for some of you.  I knew this day was coming and it is one of the many reasons I had to get off this awful drug.  I had to take advantage of being able to work from home to do this thing.  It was time.  Now is the time for you!

I am hoping this means they will quit prescribing to everyone for every single little thing.  They were handing this out like candy to many people I know.

I knew something was up when I saw this news story: "FedEx indicted for shipping drugs sold online".  So, unless your Dr will continue to meet your dosage needs with this new scheduling, you pretty much have to taper down off these.  Cold Turkey is a little harder to manage. SNRI withdrawal is better with a taper down.  I cannot give anyone a taper schedule.  I just tried to take 1/4 less every couple of weeks until I got down to halving a 50 mb tablet.  Then I just jumped off to 50 mg halved was not really making any difference and just prolonging my discomfort.  I don't know if I did it the right way.  I was just tired of dragging things out.  I was on this drug for over 10 years and I wanted it over.

I am thinking we will see a lot of new folks ending up here.... and many of them will probably be cold turkey.  I will embrace them with open arms

Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, Jul 18, 2014
@blockhead

You are 19 days in.  Please keep going.  I know it's hard but you have to hang in there.  This is probably the "windows and waves" pattern seen in withdrawal.  You can look it up.

I was right there with you.  I kept telling myself I should just probably stay on the drug because I was permanently damaged and I was the exception that would never heal.  I really thought I would feel awful for the rest of my life and needed to stay on this med or something like it.  This is one of the lies that tramadol tells you.  It doesn't give up that easy.

I hung in there and slowly things got better.  I remember the days seeming so long.  I didn't want to die but I felt like I didn't want to be alive either.  I was just existing and going through the motions.. trying to make it another day.  Then slowly the days of feeling better came more and more often and lasted longer.  I would have my bad days, but reminded myself to ride it out and things would get better.

I am proof that you can heal from this!  I am me again and I never thought I would be.  Think about people with an inury or a broken limb... they don't heal overnight.  It's painful and it takes time.

May I ask you a question?  If you do decide to stay on the meds, is your Dr going to continue to prescribe the same doses or increase them if needed... esp with this new scheduling?  

I am here if you need me.  You are so far along and I want nothing more than for you to be where I am today.  I am waiting to read your success story.

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 18, 2014
@allinblack, I was having a bad day, I told mydoctor to take them off my repeat prescription,ive tapered down over about 5 months, it been hell on earth,I did the taper on my own, my psychiatrist rang my doctor to say I had quit them, at my next doctors appointment he asked where I was getting them from, my reply was off you, he early fell off his chair, just proves how they will give them out like sweets, well today is 3 weeks off feels good, I have a daughter who is 6 the love of my life, split with her mom 4 years ago, I just want to be the best dad I can, made me cry writing this, thank you for being there to support me, im from the UK

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 21, 2014
@ditch6755

How are you doing?  Haven't seen you post in awhile.  Hope all is good.

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 21, 2014
I am doing ok.  I've been back at work. It has proven more difficult than I thought it would be.  The day usually starts feeling good but turns at some point to not.  Sleeping is sparse. Rls is still active a bit at night   Fatigue is a big one. Forcing myself though very long days with no energy to speak of. But. Two weeks today so that is good. One day at a time is how I take it. Thank you for asking. Makes me feel better knowing there are others out there  ....D

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 22, 2014
I'm glad to hear you are doing ok.  I understand about the low energy and fatigue, but still better than the pills.  You will feel better every day that passes.  Sleeping will take awhile and I can remember by week 3 I was sleeping at least 6 hours or more a night.  Baby yourself as much as you can.  When you get home from work just relax and try to take it easy.

I went to NA for awhile and it helped me being with others like myself.   We all looked the same, tired and no energy.  However it does get better I promise !!!

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 23, 2014
@meganann hope your ok im struggling on day 26,seems like its taking forever !!!

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 23, 2014
Yes I'm doing ok, almost 4 months clean.  The first month was really hard for me, but seems to be getting better each week.  My mornings are so hard.  I was so use to taking pills in the morning to feel good, now I drink a sugar free energy drink or a diet coke.  Not quite the same, but I have hope I will be a better me in a few months.  From what I read many seem much better after 6 months.  I never want to go thru this torture again, so hard on me and my family.  That is what keeps me from not using again, the hell of detoxing almost killed me.  I know others may not have been so bad and recovery may be sooner than me.  I keep playing the tape back in my head, one second, one minute, one day at a time.

Good luck to you almost 1 month off tram.  Keep posting.

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 28, 2014
Is this thread dead, day 31 feeling ok, come on ineed inspiration

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 28, 2014
I'm here @blockhead !!!!  You made it one month clean.  As many have said that pill is not the answer to our problems.  It disguises real issues we need to deal with.  But right now your body and mind are healing, and it takes a long time for some and shorter for others,  I guess it has to do with how much and how long you have taken tram.  I took it for 5 years and got up to 500 to 800 mgs.  I know if I just took one pill I would be back in the dredges of hell, and I could not handle detox again.....I'm older 50.
I remember many posts from Emily and others and their advice helped me and that is to baby yourself as much as possible.  Rest, take baths do crossword puzzles that keep your mind active, go for short walks, anything that gets the neurons in your brain to fire up on their own without the help of a narcotic.
You've made it 31 days, a huge accomplishment !!!!

1310716_tn?1287786104
by james22778, Jul 28, 2014
31 days that's amazing I usually get about three days and give up and go right back

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 29, 2014
Thank its hard but I will beat it, wish more people would post though !!

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 29, 2014
Me too !

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, Jul 29, 2014
Its just gone dead,when I most need the support, god this is the hardest thing ive ever done !

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, Jul 29, 2014
By far the HARDEST thing EVER !  I'm with you !

Avatar_m_tn
by ditch6755, Jul 29, 2014
I'm still here. Trudgeing through the days. Depression and no energy. But I'm here. Physically as far as withdrawals I'm OK. But the other stuff is hard. Stick with it

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, 16 hours
I have to post my ticker.....think I'm 120 days ( 4 months clean ).  When I  posted on this thread I was  less than one month off tram.....and NEVER thought I could do it, BUT it does get better I promise.  Energy comes back, and brain zaps go away slowly.  Emily is right, every month is better, much better.  I'm not even going to try to guess when I will be 'normal' again, however I'm happy that I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  The ride is bumpy for sure, and for me I can't ever go back on pain killers.
Everyone's journey and detox is different, but hang in there it will get better, so much better than addicted to tram.


Avatar_f_tn
by allinblack, 10 hours
Hang in there everyone.

I know some of you in early withdrawal are having a tough time seeing things getting any better.  You are convinced you are that one person who will never get better or will take longer than anyone else to heal.  You think maybe you are just that person who will have to stay on tram forever because your brain is permanently damaged.  You are afraid you will have to spend the rest of your life having the post drug blahs and if this is as good as it gets.. you don't know how you can go about the rest of your days like this.

i KNOW...because I had all of these thoughts!  I remember sitting and thinking how I was going to spend my life like this and it seemed impossible.  I would have panic about it... and I felt so trapped in my painful little body.  I didn't want to be alive, but I certainly didn't want to die.  I tried to hang on to hope and it was hard.  I would see people's success stories and could not imagine I would even be able to talk about my own.

These are the LIES this drug tries to convince you of when you quit.  It tells you that you can't exist without it and you need  it forever. It tells you that life will be lackluster without it.  It tells you that you will never have energy or a regular life without it.  It sinks its claws pretty deep and doesn't want to let you go.  

But, I did it!  I had a hard time, yeah, but I did it.  It just took me fighting those evil thoughts and living one day at a time.  Time went very, very slow at first... now it seems like it's flying by again.

So. please... listen to me.. I've been where you are and I know that feeling better does happen.  I was kind of on a merry-go-round for a bit... I even thought I had some kind of undiagnosed bipolar disorder... but it all evened out.  It's a weird ride for sure.

Avatar_n_tn
by Meganann123, 8 hours
@allinblack

Very well said.  You are over a year clean, and your words resonated with me.  Thank you !

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, 2 hours
Nice 1 allinblack, im day 35 got say im thinking a lot clearer, im glad you posted, I gives me hope thank you, hi meganann

Avatar_m_tn
by blockhead123, 2 hours
Maybe 34 then

Post a Comment