My Posts
Mar 31, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 2
oohh...srry...thanks for the heads up....didnt knw i was breaking site rules....becca
Mar 31, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 2
ok so im down to 3 8mg sub tabs left...been trying to figure out how to stretch them out...i broke one intp 4s and read online that if u use the nasal rt or rectal rt u need less and the effect last longer...anyone have exp with these routes?...im not a nasal kinda girl rectal seems doable in a bind but i dnt wanna waste the litte i have...my name has not bee...
Mar 29, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 3
Morning all....today where i live its rainy and gloomy, but to me its cleansing and peacful....normaly on fri i go for one on one sessions with dr mc evil but just knowing that i dont and i wont have to see him is so freakin awsome....i knw this road i chose to travel many moons ago is going to be rough but now that i have decided to do it with out such a neg...
Mar 28, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 29
Thanks...I just placed my name on a waiting list on the "here to help" web site..so hopefully ill get a new dr soon..I am not going back to dr mc evil...so I have enough subs to last til fri even longer if I lessen my daily dose..my hope is that I find a dr soon but if not I will take the ones I have sparingly and hey, maybe I won't need them.....
Mar 28, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 29
Its 10 pm where I am and I hid in my home all day..I layed in bed under the blanket while my dealer called and knocked and beeped outside for 20 min..my whole body was screaming to go open the door but I cldnt..with ea knock, beep, call i cried more and more...I asked god why..what did I do to deserve this torture...I asked him to plz cover me and hold me dow...
Mar 28, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 29
God i feel so alone and worthless....in a way i wish dealer wld just get here already and on the other hand im glad hes not here yet...my head is all messed up...i wish i cld crawl into a hole and hide for awhile....
Mar 28, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 29
first i wld like to thank all of those who offered advice and or kind words...it really meant alot....today however was my group counseling session and to my utter shock and dis belief dr mchatred anounces to the entire group that i had tried to taper myself "that i thought i was the dr" and he went around the room asking if any body else had tried ...
Mar 27, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 21
you are correct! i did not ask for anything for depression...i just wanted out of his office....he makes me feel like an addict not a recovering addict...its funny that none of my pain managment drs ever made me feel this way.... feel like i already failed...i knw i cannot keep dealing with him...its only a matter of time before the addict in me says eff it u...
Mar 27, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 21
ok so i just left drs office for a count and i had 2 more than i shld have and he flips!...when he asked me why i was completely honest with him telling him about the fears i was having...i told him i tryed to cut back to see if i was able to function on less...his reponse per batum.. "i will tell you when u are ready to taper, i am the dr, u are the add...
Mar 26, 2012 in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community - 21
thank u all for the advice and words of encouragement...i feel less alone in this battle of mine...pain pill addiction is such a private hell...no one knws about it until its to late....families may think smething is going on but they never really knw until u either admit it or are so distructive that u cant hide it any longer... ive lost everything ive work...