I doubt that massaging the face at this time will cause any problems, but I would check with your surgeon to see if he/she agrees.
I am not aware of any injectable that will dissolve the radiesse (radiesse is the mineral component of bone). It will ultimately disappear. You might call the company (BioForm Medical) to see if they have any suggestions.
As long as there is no gross infections (with systemic symptoms of fever, chills, etc.) I would just cover the area with a sterile gauze dressing until her doctor can see her. Otherwise she should be seen in a local emergency room.
Three weeks is quite early after a major facelift procedure. Puffiness and bumps are not uncommon aft this time. I am sure your doctor will reassure you about this.
I would advise waiting a minimum of about six weeks to allow maximum recover and healing before proceeding with elective breast surgery.
A bleaching cream like hydroquinone may help. I suggest discussing this with a dermatologist.