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Mood: Army220
Army has popped in to say Hi to my old pals.
About Me: Male, 35, MI, member since Mar 2008
I love the outdoors, camping, fishing, and hunting with my girls.

I w
... [More] as addicated to Vicoden for about 4 years.  No one knew of my addiction except a few of my pill popping friends.  I hid my addiction from wife all that time.  Finally my life was slowy getting worse and I was losing interest in everything I loved to do.  

So one day I had the balls to tell my wife!  I was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life.  I was embarressed and felt like my castle was falling apart.  My wife took it very good and was very supportive in my effort to stay clean.  She has her degree in Human Resources and she has seen how people become addicted.  Suprisenly to me there were alot more people addicted to them than I have ever thought a few of them were Sheriffs Deputies.

Anyways my quest started by also telling my docter I had enough.  He had this relieved look on his face and shook my hand like he was my dad or something.  He knows I have a promising carreer in my community and knows what I do for my community.  So he was relieved to see I wanted to quit.  He was the one that wrote my first scrip from a nasty 16 foot fall from a tree that led to surgery to remove my C1 vertabrae.  I kept him believing I still had stiffness in my neck after surgery.  That was a bunch of bull.  I should have stopped 6 months taking them after my surgery.  It was too late by then.  Mann did they make me feel great.  I had energy and talked to strangers a mile a minute.  I got a huge promo at work about 2 years after my surgery.  Promo=Stress...  Thats when it got out of hand.  I thought I needed the pills to keep up with the new job and all the new responsibilities.  I had alot to learn with my promo.  As a few years passed I started to get comfortable in my new job and confident.  

I started to get irratable as time went by and was sick of carrying pills in my pockets 10 to 12 a day in the end.  I remmember marking my calender to see how many days could go before my next script.  For some damn reason I would cut my self short a few days.  I would feel horrible for them 2 or 3 days.  I was very unproductive at work.  I seemed to hide from everyone than lead them like I was supposed to.  But when I would get my script filled I was a happy man!  As soon as I pulled thru the drive thru window at Walgreens I was ripping my bag open and would pop 2 big boys right away.

Then there I was again 15 days later empty handed and begging my pill popping friend for some pills.  I started to think how pathetic I must look when I was trying to trade pills when my scrip would get filled.

I finally had enough!  I wanted my old life back.  The doc gave me a sick slip for work.  I had a really bad stomach flu for 7 days.  Atleast thats what my employer thought.  All I heard was when I went back was  "You must have that nasty flu thats going around"  Just shook my head and said, yep.

What helped me the most was admitting to my parnter in life what the hell was up with me.  I will never let her and my two girls down again!  There is no turning back now..

My castle is starting to look good again and life is looking alot better for me.  Life just seems so crisp now.  I see things alot clearer and my concentration is back.  

Least but not last.  I am so grateful to this MedHelp site and all the encouragement I have recieved.  I always hope I can inspire someone else like some of you had enspired me.  For that my goal is to never leave this site as some people do when they get clean.  I have learned not to get caught up in all the drama that sometimes occurs.  I myself do not post much to replies, but only the ones I can really relate too.  My goal is never to abandon the people that may need my support.  I think it is selfish to feel good and jump ship.  That like a really bad captain.  You all no a good captain will make sure he is the last one on the ship before it sinks.  That has always been my motto.  I will always help that one person that really needs it.  If anyone ever really needs help I will be here thru the tough times!

Good luck to you!




[Less]
Interests: Eating Fresh Backstraps  
New and just wanted to say Hi
Aug 22, 2008 07:43PM in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
That little girl will be your fighting inspiration. Mine were and now 147 days later it gets easier everyday. Keep up t...
You knows
Aug 22, 2008 07:31PM in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Bro, I wish I new the answer for you. I have seen you struggle so hard thru this. All I can tell you is you have alot ...
Did every addict get this way before it was time...
Jul 31, 2008 09:07PM in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
I went thru the same ****. First two years I was superman. I would work outdoors till it was dark and come in and vaccu...
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mimi1313
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mimi1313
Female, 37 years
Member since Jan 2008
Mood: mimi1313 is here
Journal Entry:   "I am writing this becasue I want everyone..." [Read]
Aug 01
Thank you! I really appreciate your support. Its so funny that you called me Mimster because my sister calls me that. Melissa
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sadinmichigan
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Jul 19
Just a quick note to say hi! Goodmorning! I hope all is well and you are feeling fine..I must have missed you popping in..lol Have a great weekend..~Lisa
bobby139
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bobby139
Female
NM
Member since Feb 2008
Mood: bobby139 praying for all in need
Journal Entry:   "This is a very rouph day, my mom that i m..." [Read]
Jul 16
Just a quick note to say hi! thats the same .38 that i carry lmao. i have been busy getting this party **** done for Sat but we will catch up after that....good to hear from you buddy love bobby
merrymaria
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merrymaria
Female, 51 years
cincinnati - OH
Member since Mar 2008
Mood: merrymaria ready to tackle the world
Journal Entry:   "i got a call from someone selling hydros ..." [Read]
Jul 09
Congratulations! Time for a celebration... way to go! THAT IS GOOD NEWS> I HAVE DAY 6 tomorrow and im so happy but not feeling great. i can't wait to post 30 days we are going to celebrate. anyway keep the faith. Maria..
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bmc1976
Male, 32 years
IL
Member since Jan 2008
Mood: bmc1976 feeling great!!

Male, 32, IL
1234betterlife
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1234betterlife
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OK
Member since Sep 2007
Mood: 1234betterlife is ready for her new life
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nulife
Male, 24 years
NY
Member since Mar 2008
Mood: nulife trying!!!
Journal Entry:   "OK Im 24yrs old, i have been addicted to ..." [Read]

Male, 24, NY
usarmymedic1
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usarmymedic1
Male, 35 years
huber heights - OH
Member since Feb 2008
Mood: usarmymedic1 just have an ok day
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Female, 28 years
Spencer - NY
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Mood: Waiting4myprincess is feeling depressed and scared right now.

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