Apr 25, 2009
I know that a body that has developed this many known diseases and disorders, must have several things of a basic nature that have gone wrong. My research perseverance has pointed to several possibilities. I think a lot of issues can be traced back to small intestine villi inflammation and damage leading to leaky gut and esophagus damage as well. I have very low serotonin, which effects GI motility, blood vessel contraction and mood. (all effected in me) Even though on SSRI meds, it remains low. I'm looking into supplementing with 5-HTP, which looks very interesting and makes perfect sense. The SSRIs only hold onto the serotonin the brain already has - it doesn't give the body any new raw materials to make more serotonin.
Chronic inflammation needs to be dealt with, but NSAIDS are out, and so is prednisone (except in emergencies) so I'm looking for alternatives. Since I have osteoporosis, I can't keep taking steroids. My acid levels need to increase, so I need to somehow get off the Proton Pump Inhibitors I've been on for years, but it's a painful, slow process. Also, with a hiatal hernia and no esophageal motility, and Barrett's, I can't let any acid burn my esophagus - or since I aspirate - my lungs. So that's a hard one. But I want to FIX IT!!! My bladder is inflamed as well, with pinpoint hemorrhages (Interstitial Cystitis) so there's no end to the inflammation (CRP is high)
I of course want to live longer - we all do. I'm nothing special there. My kids have had a rough life and need me. I HATE them having to deal with my illness and downhill course. If anyone has ideas about holistic approaches, I'm all ears. My finances are a BIG problem however. Because of my ex being less than a good husband, I'm impoverished and on welfare and foodstamps. Yes, I'm a social outcast. I used to be an upper middle class gal in a big beautiful home I designed and built on a hill with millions of trees. Now, I'm in a tiny little home squashed in with too much stuff, and trying to survive on SSI.
As God is my witness - I have learned and grown through all of this, but I am nearing my breaking point. Something must give. Something must improve.........................or not. I know that if I keep going this way, I may become totally bedridden and slip away. AINT READY!
This is a very poor excuse for a journal entry. But it's what was on my mind.