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Just a quick note to say hi!
You deserve a big bear hug!
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today.
Thank you for everything!
Welcome to our community!
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Hope you feel better soon!
Congratulations! Time for a celebration...
Happy Birthday!
1103290 tn?1261754965
01/10
Just a quick note to say hi! hey kelly, hows it going?  Just hinking of you!
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1103290 tn?1261754965
01/10
Just a quick note to say hi  Thanks for the note.  Very anxious and hyper today.  Before when I would get like this i\ would drink or take another t. Maybe i am bipolar or going through menoapause/pms.  Still t free but not happy.  hope tomorrow/this week is better.  It's very hard to my civil to anyone let alone people in my family or the nurses at the hospital.
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1106880 tn?1260898678
01/10
Thanks Newway.  I'm going to give it a shot.  I've been doing some research and found a lot of meetings in my area.  I plan on going sometime next week.  Thanks for the encouagment!
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1103290 tn?1261754965
01/10
Just a quick note to say hi!  Hope all is going well.  It has snowed another foot and I'm on my way to work.  Now that the holidays are over we have to get through jan and feb.  There is absolutley no sun and it will be miserable.(self fullfilling prohecy?).  This is the time I start feeling like Jack Nicholson in The Shining.  Take care and have a great weekend!
Trudi
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1106880 tn?1260898678
01/10
Thanks for the words of encouragment.  I fear going to AA for some reason... but realize it is possibly the best thing for me.  I picture having coffee with some creepy old dude like every night and being absolutely miserable.... but I know it's just my brain attempting to tell me not to go.
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Avatar universal
01/10
It was so good to hear your positive news in December Kelly. Well done for coming off the evil stuff!  I always knew you would do it.I hope Christmas went well. I am up and down - pretty down at the moment with shakes and anxiety again. The nerve centre in my diaphragm seems to have been affected by the drugs and is very distressing. I am holding on though and prayiong for a good outcome. Happy New Year!
Chrissie
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Avatar universal
01/10
Newway,   Thank for your thoughtful note and glad to hear you managed to make it through the holidays with family etal.
Yes, those grandkids and kittens (in no particular order) helped me get through our holidays here.  I have been watching a large amount of college football, which will come to an end here soon.  

I quit smoking two weeks ago.  The "last" of the addictions.   I will now be repainting the inside of our home.  What a disgusting habit that smoking was.

Congratulations on your tramadol clean time.   You are great, you are great, you are GREAT!!!.  Fred
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today.  Thank God Christmas is over .  It is the worse holiday ever.  I'm so glad to be home and back to work.  Yes we're addicts but we are also bright, loving and very fortunate chicks.  We will have to keep on learning how to channel that desire into a positive light.  That's the challenge.  Anyone could keep on taking various potions and ungents.  However, we have chosen to be free.  It's really black and white for the most part.  Hope you have a good day.  I have a full day in the OR so I;m going to get some rest,  Trudi
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Avatar universal
12/09
I was just writing that I thought I was beyond RLS and last night had the worst RLS yet!  It is very disheartening to me that the w/d symptoms just keep coming and coming and coming.  One thing I am really greatful for is I have never really had any stomach problems, just some rumbling.  Thanks for being there and I hope your stomach settles soon!!!
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Just a quick note to say hi!  Hey Kelly, don't beat yourself up.  If I could have found some percs I would have taken them too.  I have spent the whole day very depressed wondering why I can't be like the "normal" people and drink a drink, smoke a doobie and go about my life.  But I'm not and it really pisses me off. I've gone from one drug to the next for 30 years because it fills a big empty hole that will never be full.  Every time I visit with my Mom that hole that I have managed to cover gets ripped wide open.  I've had no more than a few sips of champagne and a lorazapam.  But if I could round up a few percs or vicidon or a gram of coke I'd be living large.    We'll get through this,  Love, Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Just a quick note to say hi!  Hi Kelly, I'm on my way back to my house. I did take a lorazapam last pm and have a few sips of champagne.  Slept like a baby and amd so glad to go back to my space.  I;m just happy to have made it through w/o t  or a fifth of  Crown Royal.  My Mom was ok but ther were alot of the usual undercurrents.

Take care, Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Happy Holidays!  Sorry my proof reading *****.  The thought of a cafe mocha right now sounds good
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Just a quick note to say hi!  Hi Kelly,  Just playing wII bowling and maintaining a lo profile withn my Mom..  ThankGod I get to go home tomorrw.  maintainign sobriety which is not htat hard..Worked out a bit this afternoon which helped
Only a few people have asked me if I wnt a drink which I sweetly declined.

Take car, Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Just a quick note to say hi!
HI Kelly, justwanted you to know that I'm am thinking of you.  I'm still t and etoh free. However I've gained between around 5 lbs. and feel like a hog.  I know it's because I'm substituting food for drugs. I'm home in WV with my family. I can't stand my husband and am in a foul mood.  Very irrititable and depressed.
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Avatar universal
12/09
Just a note to see how you are Kelly. I hope things are still going according to plan. I often think of you. I am still struggling with awful depression at times, spaced out feelings and anxiety. But then I have a few better days. Maybe not good - but better. I think I am moving forward - but very slowly. I want to know how you are. You are important to me.
My best wishes for a good Christmas for you and your partner.
Chrissie
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today. Kelly I'm taking my laptop home.  Will you have access  to med help?  I'll need your support too.  My main obstacle will be alcohol.  There are no drugs at my parents house.  Believe me I've done the vicidon search many times.  About the only thing available is Lorazepam.  That just puts me to sleep.  I wonder how many people really have one of those holidays that are on the comercials.  Sad how I have wished my whole life for a happy holiday and after 20 minutes I'm ready to either leave or get wasted  We'll get through it!!!!!!
Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Just a quick note to say hi!HI KELLY,hope you are having a better week. Last pm I dreamed i found vicodin in my bed of all places and after along dream deliberation i took one pill.  I kept rationalizing that it wasn;t t so it was ok.  Today I've had the worse cravings for anything from a drink to a line of coke.  Crazy cravings, Got throught it by working out and reading posts.  Oh and look out it's time for my psycho-killer alter ego/pms.  Take care!! Trudi
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599071 tn?1300072302
12/09
Dear Kelly, I hope you have a gentle time of it this weekend, you very much deserve a break for your courage.

Michelle
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Congratulations! Time for a celebration...Hi Kelly,  It's funny how that feeling of being done with t and wanting to be free just comes about when you're ready!!!  You will succeed as you are ready.  There my be some rough days over the next week or so but maintain your motivation and determination. I feel as good as I did before Tram at this point. If you need something let me know.  Trudi
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Avatar universal
12/09
Thankyou for the message. I appreciate it. I know i will have to stop the Tram eventually, but right now it's keeping the pain at bay and i can work pain free. I'm on 500mg per day and hopefully i don't start going over that, although i am already taking more than prescribed. I'm dreading having to stop them though, i've already had a taste of what's to come and i found it unbearable and no one else i know understands what i'm talking about.i'm thankful i found this place, everyone else knows exactly what i'm talking about.

Thanks again.
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Avatar universal
12/09
Thank you!! Knowing there are other people in my situation really helps me. My mental being is so screwed up I feel life wont go on without this stupid pill
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today. Hi Kelly, How are you feeling?  It's our first snow of the season!  Getting out more and I really don't miss etoh at all.  Still in that pink cloud phase.
Keep on trucking!!!!  Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Kelly, I haven't done one social outing since giving up t and etoh.  Today I am going to my girlfriends house so are dogs can play together.  In the old days  we would do shots of vodka { She's Polish so  what do you expect).   Today I will tell her that I've stopped drinking as I have found out that it is not good for me .

I really need to watch the carbs and sweets!!

I too look forward to the day that I can go to a concert or hear a band w/o having to be all zoned out

Take care, Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Hi Kelly,  Hows it going for your today?  I've been eating like a hog.  I'm often not sure what to do with my time.  So I think I eat.  Oh well, I did get pretty thin while I was on tram.  Today has been tough I craved t for the first time,  I'm sure that's th source of my appetite.  Hope I don't get like Mama Cass before this is all over
Keep on trucking!!!!  Trudi
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1025791 tn?1259939556
12/09
Hi! It is really thoughtful of you to take the time to comment and help me. I appreciate this more than you know. It's also nice to bond with someone who has similar stories. I feel like I've been addicted to something or other since I was about 14, starting with food. Alcohol replaced food (look! I'm not really hungry and don't care much about food when I drink! Plus I lose weight!) around age 30. The only time I ever felt like I had no addiction problem was when I was pregnant. I did not even crave coffee, it was such a different state of mind. Unfortunately, the addicted me came back shortly after my daughter was born. Thanks again for the nice response!
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1103290 tn?1261754965
12/09
Just a quick note to say hi! Kelly, Just checking in on you.  Hope your doing ok.  I agree, I wouldn't want to go ct before christmas either.  Soon you'll be free!!  Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
11/09
Hi Kelly,  hows your day going?  I feel like someone hit me with a baseball bat--Had a hell of a migraine today.  Still seeing my psychologist weekly and I think it's helping. I'm waiting to even out. I'm either hyper or very fatigued.
Trudi
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Avatar universal
11/09
Kelly,   I still think you are doing fabulous.  If you are suffering from depression, why not talk with your doctor about prescribing an AD?   Warm wishes for your continued success!!!  Fred
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1103290 tn?1261754965
11/09
Just a quick note to say hi!HI Kelly,  I'm doing ok.  My energy level is good.  Just a bit hard to concentrate at times.  I'm on call the next 4 days which means stress, sleep deprivation and all the other marvelous perks of being a surgeon,(Ha-Ha)  The holidays are always a blast.  Normally I would have been pretty wasted by now as I would have to be good while on call..But I'm sober and it's not so bad.  I do hope you have a good day tomorrow. Hope the valerian root kicks in soon.
Keep up the great work with your taper!!  You are going to get through this crap!!!!

Love, Trudi
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1103290 tn?1261754965
11/09
Just a quick note to say hi! Hi Kelly, Hope you are having a good day. Thank God my "PSYCHO KILLER' phase has passed. I think the intense anxiety just overtakes me and the only thing I can do is scream and say the most hurtful things.  Last pm i took some valerian root and it seemed to take the edge off.
Take care!  Trudi
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334144 tn?1423248271
11/09
Just a quick note to say hi!  Brett Farve is the man, especially when he was in Green Bay.  My hubby is the big footballs fan.  I usually do chores oe sleep when it is on cuz I cannot sit still for that long.  The Vikings are doin good this year.....thanks to Farve.  The Bengals play them soon I think.
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1103290 tn?1261754965
11/09
Hey Kelly,

Glad you are hanging in.  Today the sun is out.  I live near Cleveland, Oh, which is right next to Lake Erie. So for the sun to be out it's a miracle.  I haven't had a drink for 2 weeks. W/o t I just don't want to drink. I know how hard it is to taper and ge off of t.  This is my second time.  I'm so glad your partner is holding. As I got to a lower dose I kinda felt like I was prolonging the agony.  But yesterday I would have given my L arm for anything to take the pain away.  
I hope you have a good day!!!   Love Trudi
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