Always se you post on other friends pages wanted to see how you were doing.. hope all is well
Thank you for everything! New to the site today, but read for hours. Your posts were very thought provoking. I was on 200+ mg Oxy for years, weaned myself to 40 mg a day and was doing great (believe I would have been able to get off entirely), but the doc was pushing Sub after it's approval in the U.S. market instead. The wd transition from oxy to sub was horrible! However, the sub life has not been great, my skies are not "blue," and I've wanted off for almost 2yrs and now you have me sold that it is do-able. I'm going to start weaning today. I'm on a monstrous dose, so I have my work cut out for me, may take months...RNstuckonSub
Hey you! Glad to see your view re sub hasnt changed either.. Lots of people tend to look back on any hard period and romanticize it and begin to feel it wasn't that bad.. But I can say with all surety that it will never be the case with Sub :)
Just a quick note to say hi!I ws so deceived. Told it was the answer to my cures. Its addictive and no better than heroin. I couldn't afford my pills for two days and the withdrawl is so bad I thought suicide. I am now more addicted and to a very powerful drug, I will be going into detox to get off this thats for damn sure.
Congratulations! Time for a celebration...then,...SIX MONTHS :) and so good hearing from you.
hi, i wanted to tell u that i miss your posts, i really miss them, yu were always full of strengh, positive with the best of hope and energy and you did the best work here helping others. hope everything is going all right :)
so u 2 have adopted another child in need? tell me more about her??? pm me if need be..catch me up...good to hear from u
how goes it? I am hoping all is well
Just a quick note to say hi! how r u doiNg dude?:
Just a quick note to say hi! And to see how your doing? Me, Not so great these day,
I am going to fill you in and send you a pm looking for some advice and input. I will send
it to you tomorrow when I have free time to write it so please watch for it my friend. I think
I need your support, so I am asking like you said to if it was ever needed...
Hope your still doing as great as last time we talked...I am failing miserabely...I think.
Sorry, I wish these notes were longer. Anyway. I see her on monday so she can make sure my blood pressure is Ok. With my kidney disease I have very High Blood presure. I can't wait to talk with her. Thanks again for your kind words. They help more than you know. I will commit myself to help others as well. When I am 30 days clean I will help someone else. I wish my Mom had the courage to get off of them. 20 years. She is on a morphine pump and very heavy pills. Not sure what they are. She does not live near me. I live in Tx. She is in FL.
The baths are helping a lot. Dose anything else help with the W/D? My husband thought about a sauna. Sweat it out. I will go to the gym tomorrow. He is going to go to the gym with me to give me strength. Thanks again!
I looked in the mirror two weeks ago and I did not know who I was looking at. I lost me. I lost my love for life. My house was begining to be messy. My bills were not being paid and all I wanted to do was lay in bed. My husband finnaly sat me down and said I want my wife back. That was what I needed to hear. Plus my middle son said why do you sleep all the time mom. Broke my heart. I was a vibrant stay at home mom that was involved with everything two years ago. Now all I am is a mom hooked on pills. I am ashamed! But, I know I will be Ok. I made a mistake. My family doctor pulled me aside and said she will help me if I think I am to deep. She says it is not my fault. The drugs make you want them. Your body makes you want them. She is so great.
Anyway. I never got addicted. Then I got this kidney disease when I had my third son and started passing stones every other day. In the hospital over 40 days with demoral being shot into me because the pain would cause me to go into labor so they kept me drugged up. Then after I passed stones all the time. My doctor reccomended a Pain doctore and she prescribed 120 pills a month and a patch. Of course i took it. I was out of pain. But I lost me. I am ashamed that after 10 years of doing great with drugs I got addicted. I used to hate my mother for what I seen with her. She would lie to my face and steel what little drugs I had back them. Leaving me with nothing when my bladder disease was at it's worst. Now I am her. But I have never lied or stole. At least not yet.
You have no idea how much your words mean to me. It is a wierd feeling. I hurt all over but I am smiling inside. I know I will get clean. I know I can handle this. With my husband by myside I can do this. Weaning off is helping but it still (sorry to be so blunt) *****! My husband gives me one and a half every six hours. When he is gone he hides them in a spot so he can call me when it is time to take my next dose. If I was trying to do it on my own I would fail. That was the problem. They were to easy to get to. I have another disease that has caused me pain for 10 years but I was great at taking meds only at night when it hurt too much. I would have 30 pills of 5mg/500 vicodin for three-four months. Never got addicted. Shoot I am over words I will post another note.
Thank You so much for your words of encouragement. I need them in a terrible way. I am hating how I feel but deep inside of me I feel a part of me that I have not seen for two years itching to come out. I want me back. I will do whatever it is I have to do to reach that goal. The light at the end of the tunnel is salvation. I see Jesus holding his hands out for me to reach him. I am crawling now but in a couple of days I will be walking then skipping and then running for his hands. As long as I keep crawling I can get there. Thank you again for your kind words. I will post again tomorrow to let you know how I am doing. I go down to 4 pills tomorrow so it will be rough. But I can do it!!
merry christmas and wishing u the best for the coming year, ocho :)
Happy Holidays! hope it's a great one.
Happy Holidays! Wishing you all the best this year OC. Peace, love and serenity always. Thanks so much for being so supportive and honest since day one.
Just a quick note to say hi! Hope your doing well. Just wanted to say i think your posts are fantastic, good advice and postive. Ty for helping out like you do here. take care ok.
Thanks for being a great pen-pal!!!
I think ill go back to work monday. Feeling alot better today. I think i might just make it. You have encourageing and positive words for me every day, i dont know how to thank you or everyone else for taking interest in a total stranger. I feel like i owe something. Did you feel the same when you came here? thanks a trillion times.
Just a quick note to say hi! your acomment was so sweet on my post. you brought tears to my eyes...i love you all so much...and i dont wanna go anywhere for a long time....
R U sure it wasn;t your 14 year addiction to oxys that made you feel so dang bad? I am a 10 yr oxy user and never heard of anyone having such a hard time as you did oast on such fsat slow dose taper. Please don't take this the wrong way. Just think back,,,,, could it have been that?
Thank you for everything!
thanks for your encouraging words...how long have you been clean? does the depression end before too long? i can do stuff to take my mind off of everything but do you know when i might wake up and feel like i used to?
Just a quick note to say hi!
Hi, just checking in... 46 days.. going well... ps - you are so awesome - I love the advice you give people and the strength of your words.. you are a very powerful voice on this forum
Thank you for everything! So my first question is i guess where do you get this sub? And ive heard so many bad things about it on this website it sounds scary.