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Just a quick note to say hi!
You deserve a big bear hug!
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today.
Thank you for everything!
Welcome to our community!
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Hope you feel better soon!
Congratulations! Time for a celebration...
Happy Birthday!
329994 tn?1301663248
09/09
Jen,
You can "lay it on me" anytime. I can take it. I think you have every reason to still be grieving and I think you just need that time. You are a good mom and you might not be the same mom, but like I said before, you will probably be a better mom.  Your mother would be very proud of you.  Just remember that she is watching over you and she wants you to live your best life, for you and for your son.
I hope today finds you feeling better, that will help too, when you get your health back.
Much love,
Colleen
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329994 tn?1301663248
09/09
You deserve a big bear hug!  Jen, it is totally understandable how you feel. I know it is easy for me to say but it will just take some time and a year is not that long when you so totally love and miss someone. I can't imagine, so please don't beat yourself up about it. You will probably never be the same as before, but you might even be a better person, more compassionate,more aware of living each day fully, you know?
I hope you get feeling better soon. Don't overdo it, take care of yourself. Yes, kids bounce back quickly. Thank goodness though, or they would drive us nuts!
Love,
Colleen
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187666 tn?1331173345
09/09
I've been having some troubles at home so haven't written back. How are you doing today (just taking one day at a time here)? I think we always feel like we have to behave for Mom, no matter how old we get. Now that your Mom is gone, there's that loss of an anchor, someone you know will hold you accountable and give you that "look" if you do something foolish. In time you'll be your own anchor, answer only to your own heart. Don't beat yourself up if you've made some bad choices lately. That's part of being human. Not fun but it's who we are. Can't go back so just keep moving forward. You can do it. Take care, irene
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329994 tn?1301663248
09/09
Hi Jen,
Sometimes when you are the strong one for so long, you end up falling apart.  You will be strong again, it will just take time and I imagine every holiday is bringing back memories. Hopefully, from those memories you will find comfort.  
The internet classes sound like that would be good for you. What are you taking?
I posted two journal entries about my doctor visits. I am slowly getting somewhere with answers, I hope.
I hope today will be a good day for you and it was good to hear from you!
Hugs,
Colleen
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329994 tn?1301663248
09/09
You deserve a big bear hug! Just checking on you Jen to see how you are! Let me know when you can, ok?
Love,
Colleen
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784382 tn?1376931040
09/09
i was doing really good... then i started school and started again. no not cold turkey, but i have deff cut down. im pretty proud of myself, the last couple of days at school i went all night with out smoking one, even with everyone around me smoking them. im kinda just turned off by them. AND im in dental school, im supposed to be promoting GOOD oral health!..... lol..... so little by little they are going away!... i know about those but they are expensive, and the filters are really expensive. i dont buy cigs now as it is, i just get from others around me a few times a day..... its ok they will be gone for forever soon!.....thanks!
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681888 tn?1272922309
08/09
hi jen what lovely words and you are right we do have to start getting on with what ever lives we have left if only for our children ,.......you are going in the right direction and im so proud of you jen just like you mom is ,..
you will bring smiles to her face now for her to see you getting on with your life ,...she will have a much happier daughter now to look down on ;).....god is with us i know now even more that before so you mind yourself and keep in touch with me
give that big boy a hug from me also ,
all my love Bernie ,.xx
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today. Jen, just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you. I hope you are ok, haven't talked to you in a few days. Hope to hear from you and that you have been resting, taking care of yourself!! Love,
Colleen
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Avatar universal
08/09
Thinking about you Jen, and I said a prayer. Not sure why I haven't heard from you. Beginning to worry. (Possibly messages being deleted before you see them?) I know you have address, let me know you are ok. Will try and drop you a note.    Madlyn
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681888 tn?1272922309
08/09
top of the morning to you jen ;)......
how is my little friend and that little sweetheart of yours doing today ,...i see your mood and i think thats very brave of you to put that out there ,.. Hun you will never lose the memory of your mom it will be with you for the rest of your life ;)good ones as well as sad ones ! but its the good ones that will keep you going on in this life ,..im thinking of you today xx
Bernie ,....
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187666 tn?1331173345
08/09
Sorry it was such a rough day for you. Memories are such mixed blessings - they bring smiles and tears. Did you see the pictures of my chipmunks and baby flying squirrel? She's so cute. Last night she finally decided to nibble on some solid food. That means I'll be able to cut back on formula feedings next week. What a relief. She won't be releasable until October but that's OK. I want to make sure she's big enough and prepared enough to go out into the big, wide world. Hope you're feeling better now.  hugs, irene
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
You deserve a big bear hug!  I am so sorry for your neck pain Jen.  Are you any better today? I didn't know about that link between osteoarthritis and loss. I do hope that you are not in pain any longer. You just rest while your little guy is in school, ok?  Take care of yourself, this is an extremely difficult time for you.  Many hugs,
Colleen
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187666 tn?1331173345
08/09
It's OK to let go of the need of her physical presence. The memories are forever. Just had the 1 year ann. of my Dad's death. Didn't seem real somehow that a year had gone by. But he's still alive in my mind and heart. Your Mom lives in you and the stories you share. irene
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
Hi Jen,
I went for my 6 month checkup and they spotted it. Both times I have had skin cancer, I had spots that I thought were cancerous maybe and they weren't. Then they find the ones that are - thank goodness! My symptoms don't have anything to do with my skin cancer, they are either gyn related or gastro related and I am determined to get to the bottom of it!!
Why do you have to wait for the results? If they did the tests, can't they at least tell you the results even if you have to wait for treatment because of insurance reasons?
I will be thinking of you,
Hugs,
Colleen
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
Hi Jen,
What did your blood work show? I hope it isn't too serious, let me know! I will pray as always for you too. Got the results of my skin biopsy - squamous cell cancer - its on my chest - will do surgery next week to take it out and should be good. Otherwise, in a holding pattern - waiting on appt at Shands for intestinal issues and my new gyn. Someone should get to the bottom of this soon!
What is going on with fiance now?
Been thinking of you!
Colleen
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353148 tn?1293061164
08/09
Thank you for your note. It realy means alot to me.
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Avatar universal
08/09
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today. If you have read my PM, I am still sorry. Please let me hear from you. Don't know if I told you but David starts school 9-8-09, that is if the schools are completed. He is working on a letter to Kobe. Take care and I love you girl.                

~Madlyn~
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
Jen,
I don't need anything but I will take prayers. I am in limboland and they cannot find what is wrong and frankly, I am so tired and over it all, so any prayers would be greatly appreciated. How are you feeling today?
Hugs,
Colleen
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
You deserve a big bear hug! I know that it has been a difficult year for you Jen. I hope you can take some comfort in knowing that your mom is watching over you and that she is always with you in spirit. I wish I could give you a big hug and let you tell me all about your mom. I am sure you have wonderful memories. Take care of yourself too, ok?
Hugs,
Colleen
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Avatar universal
08/09
You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today.i think you need to sit himj down and tell him how u feeland that ur not happy even cry if it needs to come out comunication is keyyyyyy...and if he is still doind thatto u then u r better then that and u nned to do what u have to do:)u will always have my support:)ans also thanks for all ur help today is day 3 and i feel GREAT right now..but today im going to try to get out ven if its for a lil bit..im getting there and ths time im satying re i just wanna know each day get sbetter an dbetter
love ris
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784382 tn?1376931040
08/09
no never heard of it, but i will look it up today !.... i work at a car dealership, i just volunteer at a big cat rescue. been doing it for a few years now and love every min. babies, big cats, lions,tigers and bears oh my!....lol.... and panters , critters and a few others. but im super sad to report  that there was a accident that happened the other day, in our critter room( big trailer set up for these animals), that hold all our fuzzies, bunnies,ferrots, and a few others, the ac broke and when a volunteer went in there to feed them, it was not a good sight. its too hot here in south florida and i guess it only took a few hours for the worst to happen. soo sooo sad but it was just an accident to bad we couldnt have fed them earlier.
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Avatar universal
08/09
Thank you for everything!ur words r womderful and soooooo right i know im doing the wrong thing so im changing it,,,my family is worth soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much more then that..today is ok a lil over 2 days..lol,,so im hoping tomorrow will b even better..i shouldnt stay in tomorrow right??i have been in the house sinse wed night..should i go out even if i feel like ****
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Avatar universal
08/09
Just a quick note to say hi!and to let u know your mother will always b with you.hope u going well today:)
xoxo
marisa
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Avatar universal
08/09
Thank you for everything! all ur kind words help sooooo VERY VERY VERY VERY much:)an di have to rem im doin gthis for me and my FAMILY:)im sorry but i just need a few words of wisdom positive things u know:)thanks again u all r my gardian angels:)and the only guys i can talk to
thanks
marisa
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784382 tn?1376931040
08/09
Just a quick note to say hi!...thanks for you kind words and im sorry about your mother... how are you today?.... im at work bored...lol...well just tired !...... is said welcome to MH you the leader?.....
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Avatar universal
08/09
Just a quick note to say hi!and say id b willing to help anytime
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
I will be thinking of you on Friday Jen. I know it will be a rough day. You take that time you need to grieve and be sad. I hope your fiance will be supportive. Many hugs and prayers, Colleen
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Avatar universal
08/09
Thank you for everything! The hospice nurse was here today and said the swelling in ab is fluid build-up and that the pain was causing the nausea. They want to give her a pain pump as she has a port but she wants to wait. Nurse did convince her to take the other pain meds on regular basis. She is on Avinza 120 mg every 12 hrs and 30 mg oxy every 4 to 6 hope this will help. I will mention to nurse about the med you mentioned. Thank you
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329994 tn?1301663248
08/09
Jen,
Are you ok? That note was terribly confusing. It sounds like your fiance is giving you loads of trouble and you had to call the police? Please let me know if you are ok or not. Thinking of you
Colleen
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Avatar universal
08/09
Just a quick note to say hi again. I'm a bit confused. Did this person set up your Yahoo account with your permission. Please shed some light, I am confused.
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Avatar universal
08/09
Just a quick note to say hi!  Jen, I DON'T think it's rude. I now think it's SICK. There are things you can do. Send me your address and I will explain, since your e-mails will not go straight to you. Please take care girl.
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Avatar universal
08/09
You taught me how to live and now you yourself are talking about death? God's love will see you through this,whenever you feel sick call out to God and ask to be connected with native american spirit guides,they are very protective and have healing powers.Close our eyes and call them and focus.It works.You will start to feel better.
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