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ADD Low IQ ODD? What's next? Help!

Please help! My son is 11. I have taken him to professionals since the age of 3. He is in a special ED classes and has been since 1st grade. He retook Kindergarten twice. Over the years he has developed better in school and socially, but I still have many concerns. Treatment has included different medications that all had unbearable side effects. I decided about 2 years ago that I would try do alternative treatments that have help, but not enough. He has low self-esteem issues, concentration problems, gets mad (hits pillow) and cries constantly, socially awkward, overeager to make friends,  picks on and bullies sibling repeatedly, short-term memory, knows he is different, eager to please, lazy speech, at my heels all the time, addicted to video games and TV (not interested in toys or crafts), very competitive,  and so on. His frustration level has increased recently and I'm not sure how to handle it all. I've taken him to councilors  many times in the past, but seemed like a huge waste of time. His reaction to them is "I don't know" to everything they say and sits there smiling and still like he doesn't get what's going on. He forgets most of what was said by the time we get to the car. He had gene testing with nothing coming up positive. I don't even know if he is diagnosed right. I
I believe he is smarter than realized (reported 68 IQ at age of 6) and his teacher even wants to challenge him with on grade level work, but the ADD and low self-esteem issues are getting in the way. I would love to keep him off meds and introduce heavy vitamin regulated diet therapy, but worried about what such heavy vitamins could do to his internal organs over the years. Not to mention my insurance doesn't cover alternative therapy. How would you handle this situation if it were your child? I'm considering more therapy, but don't know what kind is the best or if it is even worth going to due to his attitude. He is a very sweet child with a lot of potential. I want the best for him and not sure if I'm hindering him in any way. Please help. Ty              
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Avatar universal
Oops let me clear up the IQ OF 20 % for his age. The number is still low IQ of 77.
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Avatar universal
well you are not alone on that one.... my son age 9 has been seen by the dr.s tested for several issues since age 16 months old. He just recently had been diagnosed ADHD / ODD and Low IQ of 20 He also tested at age 4.5 yrs Yes that it showing his maturity is barely half his age.. Hang in there. If you feel he has a higher IQ or may have been diagnosed wrong then I suggest you ask for a second test by a different Dr. that way you could see if the results even come out remotely close.. I have one thing to say You Are Your Childs ADOVCATE if you don't ask for more testing who will ???? GOOD LUCK..  As for me I don't believe I need to ask for more my situation with  my son those  tests answered so many of my concerns that it now makes alot of since why he does  what he does.
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189897 tn?1441126518
COMMUNITY LEADER
    Well, he certainly does have many of the normal symptoms for a ADD/ADHD child.  I agree with you on his IQ assessment.  In fact to give an assessment in first grade is kind of weird anyway.  A child with ADD will always do worse on a test like that due to lack of ability to focus.  If he had a very experienced and patient tester, it might be kind of accurate for that point in time - and nothing else.   And you also might want to run through some of the other posts on this forum, I think you will find them helpful.
    A good diet will always be important for any child.  And you are correct to be worried about a heavy dose of vitamins.   Some of them can be harmful.  Almost all reports out now, say that if a person has a good normal diet, most vitamins are not necessary.  Also I have never seen any research that shows a strong supplemental vitamin therapy to be effective.  Omega 3's are certainly worth doing in my opinion, but in moderation.  
   So what do you do?  Information is what you need.  I just saw a wonderful special on adult ADD that you might find interesting as it does relate to your child.  Check out your PBS schedule for a program called "ADD and loving it".  Also they created a website, called  "totallyadd.com".
   I would definitely buy the book, "The ADD/ ADHD Answer book," by Susan Ashley.   You will find it extremely helpful.  
   You had a bad experience with medication.  That can certainly happen.  Sometimes, its just not right for the child, and sometimes the doctor prescribing doesn't have a clue.  What kind of a doctor were you working with, and what meds(and doses) did you try?  The are a wide range of meds and doses that a good knowledgeable doctor might have more success with.
    Not sure what kind of counselors you saw.  He certainly could use some extra tutoring as the subject level gets more difficult.  He definitely needs study skill support (but his special ed teacher should hopefully be able to provide that.)  What he really needs is to be able to understand what is happening to him and that it is something that many kids have or are going through.  In fact the web site I mentioned is all done via short videos.  You might preview some of them and then sit down with him and watch them.  He is old enough to know what is affecting him.  If you do see someone for him, I would suggest a psychologist or pediatric psychiatrist that does specialize in ADHD.
     I would certainly let his teacher try grade level work.  He will need more time on tests, etc.  But its worth the try.  Especially if his teacher thinks it might work.
     Finally, the book I recommended will give you lots of ways to help him.  If you want a pretty detailed web site on AD/HD - I would recommend this one.  
          http://www.healing-arts.org/children/ADHD/index.htm
   It also give a lot of information on all kinds of treatments and goes into very specific information of all kinds of diets and vitamin therapies which I think you would find helpful.  But be warned that there is a ton of info here.  Don't try and read it all in one sitting.
        Hope some of this helps.  Best wishes.
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