I would start from the beginning. When I was a child, I was always a little hyperactive and had a little low attention. But doing good on my grades. WhenI was in ninth grade and was about 14 years old I developed paranoia. Had non-bizzare delusions. Had cameras at home but no hallucination. Also got rejected by my friends. Serious social anxiety occured. During exams I had depression, sleep deprivation, stress, bad-diet. And then I totally lost my cognition. And a period of Mania occured.
Went to a doctor, said, Schizophrenia. Then I was on some antipsychotic drugs - Olanzapine(Zyprexa) and Zuclopentixol (Clopixol). Then went to another doctor and said it was Delusional Disorder. I have a weird kind of crying. When someone talks about something, I start crying without reason. Risperidone (Risperdal). I was given SSRIs at times.
After getting involed in a non-profit internet work, my delusions were gone. It must have been the involvement that done that. I discontinued my medications then.
After developing psychosis again after a year, the Treatment continued with various doctors and I developed Shizoid Personality with antipsychotics. I was given Venlafaxine(Effexor) , Mirtazapine (Remeron) and Again SSRIs.
Now the latest diagnosis is Schizoaffective Disorder. I then got hospitalised for aggression. I was on the drug Risperidone(Risperdal) for two months and also on Zuclopentixol (Clopixol) injections. And I developed social anxiety, poor attention and zero social skills.
After getting off the clinic, I self medicated to Risperidone(Risperdal), Clonazepam (Rivotril) and Mirtazapine (Remeron) at recommended dosage (And Zuclopentixol (Clopixol) injection) and feel good, and developed social skills, and social anxiety is less.
Heres what I am right now , I am agitated, hyperactive, low attentive and hear less. And also have sexual dysfunction and anhedonia.
Now I am thinking about something. Is it ADHD? I always am ADHD type but not that insane. I am afraid of antipsychotics because they lower social performance and develope social anxiety. And I have no friends now.
What can be your diagnosis? Doctors wont give me enough time to discuss my whole life that I wrote here.