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my son has adhd/bipolar

My son has adhd/bipolar. I'm very confused about everything, i keep blaming myself as to maby its my fault that my son has these conditions? did i do something wrong? My son has changed medicine numerous times, its like only a temporary fix for him. He is on yvanse,intuniv, and trileptal duringt he day and then he takes trazodone to sleep at night. even then that dont work all the time. I get scared because my son does things to himself he has took the first layer of skin of his lips, he picks at himself to make himself bleed. He bangs his head up against walls until he hurts himself or he gets a bruise or bump on his head. He has been kicked out of a daycare, we had to change his school. He was curently sent home because he told his teacher that he was going to kill himself after she made him made, yes, i know i he is only 5 he really dont know what that means but it still gets scary that he states this. I'm at my wits end with everything, i even lost a job due to my son's condition for the fact that i had to be with him a lot of the time. Am i to blame? and Am i the onyl one that has a i guess you can say a serious promblem? advise??????????
2 Responses
189897 tn?1441130118
   No you didn't do anything wrong.  ADHD is genetic.  It could have come from Uncle Louie's side of the family.  Who knows?
   And you are certainly not alone.  Check out this site for lots of information on raising a bipolar child -   http://stackjourney.blogspot.com/2010/01/giving-intuniv-in-two-daily-doses.html
   I had a member send me a message on bipolar and ADHD.  He has bipolar.  He felt that it was important to know the difference since the meds used for ADHD are not good for bipolar.  I will copy the message below.  I do understand the changing of medicines.  They all work differently  for different people.  However, a really experienced doctor will be able to eliminate some of those choices.  Hopefully, you are not going through a pediatrician.  Actually, this may take 2 posts due to the length of the message that I am resending to you.  Hope some of this helps.
    Sent by gjayme31 Oct 04, 2010 11:46PM
There are some differences between bipolar and ADHD and it's important for schools to know these. . When a person is in a depressed state the are a danger to themselves. These drugs they are using to treat ADHD are very dangerous to a bipolar person and the people in schools. If a child doesn't go to daycare; school will be the first place he shows obvious signs.
Stephen King writes such good scary movies because he has dreamed them all of his life. He doesn't openly admitt he is bipolar but if you've read about him you'd know he wittnessed his friend getting hit by a train when he was young and totally blacked it out but had a speech impediment for weeks after. These are signs of bipolar.  Thats where his story Stand By Me came from. Winstin Churchill had bipolar and called his depression the big black dog. Vincent Van Gough cut off his ear in a fit of mania and eventually shot himself to death. Most actors, actresses, comedians and singers are bipolar and this is why they eventually self destruct.
Bipolar kids start punning and showing an overly mature since of humor at the ages of 2 and 3. They are master manipulators by the age of 4. They close up and don't talk about their innermost secrets very early because too many people have told them about how bad they are (including the parents sometimes). I know these things because I'm bipolar, my father is bipolar and out of my six kids 4 are bipolar. We have a very hard time even opening up to each other because we each think we are right and everyone else is wrong. Two of my boys started off as manics and two girls as depressed. I can cycle my moods according to the energy in a room but in learning situations I go into what I call sensory shut down. Some people call it day dreaming but when i do it trust me the lights are on but no one is home. I have to be shaken to come out. This is how I learn in a room full of people. At night in my dream my whole day replays. The whirring thoughts come from not being able to process. Believe this or not... My son's teacher (1st grade) told me your son was not listening during story time. He just sat spinning on the floor. Well he came home knowing the whole story by heart. The little guy is failing reading he just memorizes everything on Monday. He excels at math. I have only had psychotic episodes once and that was after being in a manic state for more than a week. I definatly have "trigger" words but I have no idea what they are because we don't remember psychotic episodes. My sons "trigger" words are "I'm going to call your parents." He throws things including his desk and he is only in first grade. His teacher keeps triggering him even though I've told her not to say it and to just do it. She is bound and determined that he's adhd when I know he's not and he doesn't do these tantrums at home because I never say those trigger words.
Well anyway here are the list of bipolar symptoms for children. The symptoms in adults are different.
Very Common Symptoms of Early-Onset Bipolar Disorder
• Separation anxiety
• Rages & explosive temper tantrums (lasting up to several hours)
• Marked irritability
• Oppositional behavior
• Frequent mood swings
• Distractibility
• Hyperactivity
• Impulsivity
• Restlessness/ fidgetiness
• Silliness, goofiness, giddiness
• Racing thoughts
• Aggressive behavior
• Grandiosity
• Carbohydrate cravings
• Risk-taking behaviors
• Depressed mood
• Lethargy
• Low self-esteem
• Difficulty getting up in the morning
• Social anxiety
• Oversensitivity to emotional or environmental triggers
Common Symptoms of Early-Onset Bipolar Disorder
• Bed-wetting (especially in boys)
• Night terrors
• Rapid or pressured speech
• Obsessional behavior
• Excessive daydreaming
• Compulsive behavior
• Motor & vocal tics
• Learning disabilities
• Poor short-term memory
• Lack of organization
• Fascination with gore or morbid topics
• Hypersexuality
• Manipulative behavior
• Bossiness
• Lying
• Suicidal thoughts
• Destruction of property
• Paranoia
• Hallucinations & delusions
Less Common Symptoms of Early-Onset Bipolar Disorder
• Migraine headaches
• Binging
• Self-mutilating behaviors
• Cruelty to animals
189897 tn?1441130118
and for the second part of the post - sorry for the length.

This is a list of the differences between ADHD and Bipolar because they are very similar:

1. Destructiveness may be seen in both disorders but differs in origin. Children who are ADHD often break things carelessly while playing (“non-angry destructiveness”), whereas the major destructiveness of children who are bipolar is not a result of carelessness but tends to occur in anger. Children who are bipolar may exhibit severe temper tantrums during which they release manic quantities of physical and emotional energy, sometimes with violence and physical property destruction. They may even exhibit openly sadistic impulses.
2. The duration and intensity of physical outbursts and temper tantrums differs in the two disorders. Children who are ADHD usually calm down in twenty to thirty minutes, whereas children who are bipolar may continue to feel and act angry for up to four hours.
3. The degree of “regression” during angry episodes is typically more severe for children who are bipolar. It is rare to see an angry child who is ADHD display disorganized thinking, language, and body position, all of which may be seen in angry bipolar children during a tantrum. Children who are bipolar may also lose memory of the tantrum.
4. The “trigger” for temper tantrums is also different. Children who have ADHD are typically triggered by sensory and emotional over stimulation, whereas children who have bipolar disorder typically react to limit-setting, such as a parental “no.”
5. Disturbances during sleep in children with bipolar disorder include severe nightmares or night terrors often with themes of explicit gore and bodily mutilation.
6. Children who are bipolar often show giftedness in certain cognitive functions, especially verbal and artistic skills (perhaps with verbal precocity and punning by age two to three years).
7. The misbehavior in children with ADHD is often accidental and usually caused by oblivious inattention, whereas children with bipolar disorders intentionally provoke or misbehave. Some bipolar children are described as “the bully on the playground.”
8. The child with ADHD may engage in behavior that can lead to harmful consequences without being aware of the danger, whereas the child with bipolar disorder is risk seeking.
9. Bipolar children tend to have a strong early sexual interest and behavior.
10. Children with ADHD usually do not exhibit psychotic symptoms or reveal a loss of contact with reality, whereas children with bipolar disorder may exhibit gross distortions in the perception of reality or in the interpretation of emotional events.

There are 3 levels of bipolar. Bipolar I, Bipolar II, and Cyclothymia. Lithium is usually used to treat bipolar because it treats depression and mania but it cannot be given to a child under 12. I have never used drugs. If a child is hyper I use the adkins diet as it will bring a hyper person down within a week. Pure protein and dairy. The will be lethargic by week 2 but I usually keep it going for a month. Stimulants are good for treating depression. Its only dangerous for mania because when a person is in mania they are secreting large amounts of adrenaline and endorpines and they are stimulants. When a stimulant is added you get kids that can't ever sleep and they will develop psychotic symptoms quick.
Oh BTW let parents know that even if its ADHD or bipolar any cough syrup or flu medication over the counter will triple symptoms. All of them state under warnings do not use if you have a psychiatric condition. I use thyme to treat sinus congestion, hey fever and sore throat. Oregano is a heavy seditive and sometimes I use chamomile teas.
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189897 tn?1441130118
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