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Did your spouse or family know you were using
When I used nobody ever new .They never sespected it .When I did come clean with my husbad he helped me threw WD but I dont think he really thought it was a problem because it was pills. If it had been a street drug I think he would have been more concerned but because it was not I dont think he really thinks it a big deal .Anyone else in my shoes .
No one knew I was using at all- save my drug dealer.
I was up to 40 on the worst days, 30 on the days that were "not so stressful".
How was I even able to function?
I am down to 4 now on a taper and notice things about myself that were SO different before when I was using so many.
I used to think I was different than the junkies that were my friends because I didn't shoot up or smoke it....
I DROVE with my kids in the car. I could have KILLED someone! I blacked out so many nights-
There were mornings I couldnt remember a thing. Even when I joined here this last time...I would have to read posts to remember what I said.
Very scary.
Scariest part is that no one noticed a thing.....
Guess that's the "gift" of this junkie.
(:
I was up to 40 on the worst days, 30 on the days that were "not so stressful".
How was I even able to function?
I am down to 4 now on a taper and notice things about myself that were SO different before when I was using so many.
I used to think I was different than the junkies that were my friends because I didn't shoot up or smoke it....
I DROVE with my kids in the car. I could have KILLED someone! I blacked out so many nights-
There were mornings I couldnt remember a thing. Even when I joined here this last time...I would have to read posts to remember what I said.
Very scary.
Scariest part is that no one noticed a thing.....
Guess that's the "gift" of this junkie.
(:
My husband was also very supportive and only knew the extent because I told him. I think my mom and step-dad suspected because they are recovery people. Tramadol, as Avisg probably understands, is easier to hide. If I'd been taking Vicodin, everyone would know because I'd be sprawled on the couch. Those things hit me hard.
No one knew or knows of my addiction! I have hidden from everyone but this forum. My husband isn't exactly the supportive type and my family would not support me either. I've done this all alone...without this forum who knows where I'd be? I quit CT all the while dealing with a very, very serious family crisis (I mean, it's really really bad) and my mom is dying of cancer as we speak. My stress level is through the roof and stopping the madness of my addiction has certainly added to that. I can tell you all though that I have done this by the grace of God. Without my faith and much prayer (and this forum is answered prayer) I couldn't have done this, let alone get out of bed everyday.
So, I guess since you all know about my addiction it isn't a secret anymore!
So, I guess since you all know about my addiction it isn't a secret anymore!
I did not fool anyone for even a second! Except maybe myself...................
oh...no one knew I was abusing them...ppl had known I was taking vics for my back injury...but after a while they figured I wasn't on them anymore...
two ppl in my office know about my abuse/addiction and its only because we share that addiction...so far one of them is trying his damnest to stay clean...the other one respects my decision and is proud of me for it...but I have no idea if she is or isn't on them...and its none of my business.
I hardly talk to family except my lil bro...and he knew, again, not how much but that i enjoyed them. And my friends had no idea till I told them.
two ppl in my office know about my abuse/addiction and its only because we share that addiction...so far one of them is trying his damnest to stay clean...the other one respects my decision and is proud of me for it...but I have no idea if she is or isn't on them...and its none of my business.
I hardly talk to family except my lil bro...and he knew, again, not how much but that i enjoyed them. And my friends had no idea till I told them.
I'm right here with you all. Mine is a very supportive man...but like Avisg's, if it were a street drug he'd understand more. He actually said "IF you think you have a problem..." i had to make him look me in the eye so i could say "I DO have a problem"
He always knew that I liked vicodin...but he had no clue just how much I liked them or how much and how often I was taking them.
He always knew that I liked vicodin...but he had no clue just how much I liked them or how much and how often I was taking them.
I had the exact same experience. My husband knew I "liked" them, but he had no idea I was taking them on a daily basis, let alone 6-10 a day. He has been a great support, but he hasn't experienced addiction, so he doesn't always get what I'm going through. That's why it's helpful to talk to fellow addicts. Still, it was such a relief to come clean with him.
I forgot to say, yes they knew I was using and drinking just not how much.
My husbands exactly the same because it was just pain relief he didn't think there was a problem,he didn't know I was taking 18 to 24 pills a day.With the alcohol he just said when the liver is healed you'll be able to have a drink just on weekends or something just be careful(yeah right).I had to explain to him that I'll never be able to drink alcohol again,It's the old 1 day leads to 2 days leads to 3 days etc.I think he has finally realised the new me has to be forever. Denise
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