I think my boyfriend rapedme?

[BreatheHopeInMe]

I'm 18 years old, female, and I have a boyfriend of two years.
Thursday morning we were laying in my bed home alone in our underwear watching TV.
I had said when he got there that I didn't want to have sex.
After going to the bathroom and coming back, he begins to get intimate with me.
I say no
over and over and over and over
but he keeps going and I'm to weak to push him away.
He has sex with me regardless of what I have to say so I end up going along with it. I didn't know what else to do. I was to weak to get him off.

Can somebody lend some insight?

[mpjp802]

Honey, thats rape my babys father did that to me and i ended up pregnant.  I now have a baby by him and i cut him off when he did that to me.  I know how you feel since i experienced it also.  I dont know if all the details were the same but i know i told him no tried to push him off then he still did after a while i stopped fighting i dont know if thats what you meant too but i didnt get into it at all it was terrible im scared of this man to this day but if you need anymore help or advice feel free to contact me.

[allmymarbles]

You make no mention of his being violent or using force to have sex with you. You ended up "going along with it." That is not rape. It is more a sign of a submissive nature.

[Soggymoggy]

Hi there,

When you say you were "too weak" to push him off you, do you mean physically or emotionally/mentally?  If you mean you were physically trying to push him off you and he carried on, then yes - he did rape you.

Either way, the guy clearly has no respect for either your emotions or your body, and you need to end your relationship with him immediately. Whether you could prove rape in court is irrelevant in a sense; he forced you to do something you didn't want to do, knowing perfectly well that you didn't want to do it. There is no place for that in a healthy relationship.

I suggest you break ties with him altogether, but consider speaking to the police first. Even if you do not wish/are not able to press charges, you must be realistic about this man - if he'll force you to have sex while he's in a relationship with you, you need to consider what he may be capable of when he's angry.  If you possibly can, please also tell your family or at least a couple of close friends so that they can help to look after you; and like I said, make your fears known to the police so you can get help quickly if things turn nasty.

Once you've severed ties with him (and I do mean cut him off altogether), I suggest you seek counselling; the fact that you weren't sure whether his actions were wrong or not indicates you may have an issue with self-worth.

Best of luck in dealing with this, and do try to find the strength to tell someone what has happened. We'll be thinking of you.

[margypops]

You say you ended up going along with it so I am not certain if this could be considered rape as he didnt force you, others may know differantly,I think you should tell this guy you dont want to see him any more because regardless whether it is rape you told him NO and he kept going, he is abusive at least... move on and find a decent guy who will take NO for an answer..