I have a 9 year old son. Today he arrived back home with me after visiting his father for a week and a half. Earlier this evening he said he needed to tell me something personal. He said his dad would touch his private parts at night when they would lay in bed. My son's father still lives with his mother, so my son sleeps with his father since he does not have a room of his own there. My son said that his father would put his hand down my son pants and grab my sons privates and say things like "Is this a worm?" "Is this a snake?". My son said he would tell his dad to stop but his father would still try, but at times my son would put his own hand over his private in order to block his father from touching him. He also said that his father would bite or nibble his ear. This happened on more than one occasion. My son says this makes him really uncomfortable, which makes complete sense. My son said this is the extent of what happened but I'm not sure if there's more, but I don't want to push him for answers. Is this considered molestation? My son said nothing else happened. But i feel like this is not right. My son's father lives in another state so my son only visits him during school breaks. He is not scheduled to see his father again until about 3 months during spring break.
I want to bring this up to my sons father but i know he will deny it. He is a compulsive liar, and has a criminal record. I have had 2 restraining orders against him. So obviously communicating like 2 civil adults at times is not possible since he tends to belittle me or be immature. We have a court order where I have legal and physical custody of my son and he has visitation during my sons school breaks. I need to know if this is molestation so that I can do something about future visitation. Whenever I express concerns about his visits, his father tells me "it's in the court order for visitation so there's nothing you can do about it".
Another reason. I need to know if I am overreacting because if I move forward with action, as I stated before, my sons father has a criminal record. He has a felony and a couple of misdemeanors on his record (nothing violent, although still not a good thing). So if I come forward with this and he gets some sort of punishment, I'm not sure if he will get a worse punishment. And although he has done many wrongs, he is still my sons father and it will affect my son. But my son still comes first and I need to protect him if need me.
Does anyone have any insight if this is molestation or just a father being "playful".
I am stressing out ever since he told me this a couple of hours ago.