Hm. How about "the way you behaved last summer made me realize I don't want to be with you anymore". Period.
You sound like one of those girls who just can't say no. You can, though. Just say no, goodbye.
He couldn't "force" you to stay with him all summer, you are willing to be made to do what he wants. Stop it.
Just get out.
Time to get out, you dont have to be there, unless he took a lot of Therapy and anger management he wont change especially if there are problems from his childhood and past, you could go on like this for years , he is not worth it, You need to let go.
dont fsll for his phony story, just remember that is is an abusive person, and he will just get worse luck jo
Thanks for the support, everyone. It makes me feel better to hear other's opinions. I'm going to remain strong and not give in to any of his false claims, no matter how much he pressures me.
unless he physically restrained you, which he could not have possibly done all summer, there is no way you were forced....find the door and use it...get out before something really bad happens, there are plenty of other fish in the sea move on
Be careful, tho. There are many stories of men that kill wives and girlsfriends after trying to get away from them.
The 100% turn around is extremely typical of these relationships. You're right all of a sudden you are the world to them and they'll "do anything" to fix it. Everything except change.
Just tell him you aren't happy in the relationship and you want to move on. Change your phone number if you have to and confide in some close friends that can help keep an eye on you. Don't mean to scare you but better safe than sorry.
It is time for you to get out, and do not look back as for me I was also abuse for years, they say they will change, it will be for a while but they will go back to there old ways,pls take my advice, one day I was hurt so back when I was 7 month pregnant,my son was born,he was 2 pounds at birth, he was in the hosiptal for 3 month after he was born, the doctor thought that he wasn't going to make it,he was so tiny, after 1 month I forgave his father, but the abuse started again, after 3 month I was able to take my son home, when my son was 5 month old he hit me again, this time I had my son in my arms, I was going down the steps to get away from him,he grab me by my hair,and I fell down w/ my son, thank God my son wasn't harm. that is when I realized that this man will never change, I left and never look back, the next time he laid eyes on my son my son was 21 years old. and guess what he is still the same abusive man that I left 26 years ago, some people change, but this man will never change, you need to get out now, or things will get worst, always remember you deserve better. God Bless.
soooo, what has happened? have you left him for sure yet? i agree with all these women. my mother was in an abusive relationship and it did not get any better, it only got worse. it started like your story, only words and insults at first... but once my mom moved in with him, all hell broke loose... all of a sudden she was his punching bag for whatever reason. at the time she was in her mid 20's with two little girls, did not know a lick of english or knew how to get a job yet she managed to get out of the situation. it wasn't easy for her, growing up we did not get to see her much b/c she was supporting me and my lil sis but i did learn to not take any type of abuse from a man. also, just like MrsOckert said, be careful. Once they think they own you, they will do everything possible to keep you from goin. First they are all nice and loving and once they see that doesn't work anymore to keep you, they turn to threats and violence. Do not ever trust a man/woman w/ anger/control issues 100%, always watch your back b/c you never know what might trigger them to act out of violence. best of luck and i'll pray for you. as far as how to tell him, i would suggest telling him straight up. if you do not feel comfortable, then i would find something that will take up alot of my schedule and kind of push him away w/out him knowing. also, let your family know what is goin on. let them know how you feel and that you are actively trying to get out of the relationship. if he askes them where you are or what you are doing, they do not have permission to tell him any info about you. another way is to find something he is doing wrong (ex: talking to another girl) and blow that up to make you look like you were sooooo hurt and it wasn't fair and you are done w/ him. never give him a reason to blame you or call you names. also, when y'all breakup, don't jump into another relationship or party like crazy. he'll just get mad and think you broke up to do that. lay low for a while and he'll forget about you. i'm not trying to scare you and i know this is extreme but u never truley know everyones true colors.
My dear ICEyun,
I was able to release myself from a mental, verbal and physical abusive relationship this year.
Breaking up or ending a relationship with a person who is abusive takes a lot of courage and planning.
If you are still in the relationship, you need to know that I do understand. He is his back to behaving in the very charming and romantic way, the man you found so increadibly attractive and charming. This is the time to start paying attention for you.
If you are no longer with him and you have been able to withstand his manipulation. Then it is a different story.
What ever you choose, what is important here is... YOU! and what you want.
Let me know how you are progressing and I will be more than happy to provide you with suggestions as to what to do next.
Abusive people are not to be underestimated and it is important that you are aware of that.