Oh my goodness, you sure are in a mess right now. It does'nt matter what problems he has. He has no right to ever put his hands on you or call you names. You can not help him and you can not fix him. Leave him, and do it right away. Let him try to post the pictures. I really don't think FB will allow nude photos anyway. Tell you family and friends he might try to post them and he made you pose for them. So what if you might have a little bit of embarrassment for a short time. Your health and safety comes first. If you feel like you can't go back home because he lives so close then contact a womens shelter. They can set you up in a safe place and he will have no idea where you are. Your in school right? They have counselors on campus so see one today and let them know what's going on.
Get a restraining order. And get the law involved. Get yourself out of the situation.
Now some women would say, "So print the pictures," and give him the finger. But you don't. What I am saying is that there is more here than meets the eye. You seem to need him for some reason. If that were not so you would have sicced the police on him long ago.
You posted this exact same problem in September, and it is now March. That's 7 months.
Everyone who knows you can kind of imagine what you look like naked. It's hard to believe anyone would be shocked to death by the photos.
This is your choice. You can choose to live like this or you can choose that you don't want to live like this. It's not like you live in some country where you are denied choice or have no options.
If you choose to continue to live with this man, that's totally up to you - but understand that this is how you are choosing, of your own free will, to live.
No one can decide except you.
You can only be treated as bad as you let yourself be treated.
Leave him, get a restraining order if necessary.
If he does post the pics (and hes probably just bluffing to control you, he knows he'll look like a petty jerk if he does) it won't be the end of the world - and MUCH better than spending the rest of your life with this loser. You only live once, why spend it like this?
I know it's so hard my bf is damn controlling I can't go out eat food or do anything m so frustrated but we have our photos together what if he shows to someone ??? Pls help
I am so confused N I don't want anything with him just afraid tht he will spoil my name
That's the only reason I am still with him
It is time for u to recognize that u are strong. You know what u need to do do not be afraid to do it. Hon, it's just pictures so what u aint got no clothes on. if he shows people then they'll be shocked and get over it. Is some really worth a lifetime of abuse? Everyone gets naked sometimes, if u don't have a troll doll down there u aint got nothing to be ashamed of. It's not worth it.
You could always preempt him and let them know there are some gorgeus pics off you out there, put some humor into it, I doubt others will care .there are many good men out there looking for a good woman don't waste your life on a loser .good luck
I agree with you- be empowered to take charge blondekiss, no woman deserves to not have her opinion matter in a relationship- you can do this, break the cycle!
The best way to help him is to leave him. He'll never get help because everything is great for him. You don't have to leave him forever, but IF he changes - and he might not - he will only change if he is uncomfortable. People don't change until they get in enough pain and are at rock bottom. Does he use drugs? Do you? That would be a good excuse to go to a residential drug program. Either one of you. But know that you are in the most danger when you try to leave him - even if it's temporary. He will never "let" you go so no need to discuss it; in fact better not to. Just get somewhere. Start carrying important papers, id cards, medications, etc with you. Or start taking things you need to a friends house. Just do it on the under. Don't be ashamed if you don't want to leave him permanently. But also your life is passing you by, and you will regret that. The only way you can help him is by letting him fall. In the meantime, work on yourself: therapy, college, start doing the things you want to to have a fulfilling life. If he wants that also, he will see how you are doing it and he'll follow; if not, then maybe he doesn't want the same things as you. As of right now, he has no reason to change, he has what he wants.
I just posted the comment below to someone else. I gave the following ideas for leaving and staying safe at the same time. She was in a different position, but adapt it to your case. And remember, leaving an abusive spouse is the most dangerous time for you, so you just need to do it.
When you get a chance to leave, the best thing you can do is go somewhere public where if he tries to make you leave with him and you refuse, it will cause a big scene and a bunch of people will call the police on him. walk in to anywhere (a hospital, police dept, grocery store, casino, etc) go in and REFUSE to leave. The worst thing they can do is call the police on you, which would be great for you. If you can only find people who "don't want to get involved or call 911" lock yourself in a womens bathroom. They can holler all they want it will only draw attention. Stay in there as long as you need to. Eventually one of the ladies visiting the restroom will go look to see if their still there, or let you use their phone to call 911 or go get your friend or whatever you need. Once he does'n't know where you are, you can discuss things from there by telephone. Let him go thru all his anger and threats for a few weeks. Eventually he'll see you are serious and he will have to change his strategy.
Call the cop and don't go back. If he does put naked pics online and ppl judge cause they don't know the situation then f them.
HI I was abused by a boyfriend for 6 1/2 years. It got worse when we moved in together, because I couldnt keep my home at the time. He started beating me and doing most of the things that your boyfriend does. It doesnt get better. It only gets worse. I finally ran away. He wanted me back, he even cried. But he is bipolar. Bipolar is like someone being Dr Jekyll/ Mr Hyde. Nice and then with no reason mean angry and even raging. A person like that has no idea they are abnormal and may even say it's all you. and believe it to some extent. I wanted to kill myself, but I'm glad I didnt because he was Not Worth it! Get away from him, move away, change your address. dont get a home phone only a cell phone. Maybe even get a roommate, so you're less likely to be a lone. Start over, and Do go get that education! Youlle learn alot, make new friends and feel good about yourself again. Go to counseling if you have to . And Watch out for the same kind of man! They prey on nice, sweet girls. So watch out if you get another controller/ abuser. Dump him! Dont waste your precious life! And as for the threats, tell him, go ahead. That you're sure all his guy friends would love to see what abeauty you are. and would he really want Everyone to see what he's got? That will make him nervous. Tell family ahead of time of the threats, so in case he follows through, theyll be angry at Him Not you. You must have courage. And everything will be OK. I promise. Just quietly leave him. He'll come home, you ar e Gone. You can do this. Pray for the Strength and it will come
Guess what girl? I went through the same thing. I had a bf who beat me and threatened to tell my family about my abortion who are very religious.. Guess what? After a year or being scared And letting him beat me and cheat on me I told him I didn't care anymore and if he were to go that extreme I would report abuse and he would lose everything. And now he doesn't even have the GUTS to open his mouth and I'm finally free. You could do the same.. Don't threaten him but show him you don't care.. All you want to do is be free.. Better yet don't even tell him it's over just start ignoring him from now and block his number.
u seriously put up with this??!!! ur too old u should no better!! ive been in this situation but i was 14! and young and scared to get out!! ur going to make it worse by sicking around! he is not going to ever change! they never do! especially threatening u and ur family! that is messed up! just leave! run to ur family tell them everything! go to the police! tell them everything even about how he forced u to take the naked pics and threatend to post them! they will go delete them so he dont have them anymore! he will go to jail if u tell them everything that has gone on! if i were u i would tell him, u are a pice of crap! ur a lowlife and u will never find a woman who loves u! u are insecure and have mental problems, i am done i am leaving and u will regret ever doing this to me! tell him u dont care about the naked pics anymore and that u dont care and as long as i get away from u i am happy! so go screw yourself and karma when she comes to visit u!!!!! GET OUT!!!!!