You have to understand this is a farmer's recommendation, that don't much like to many Westerns, but:
An American Indian raised long distance horseman races his mustang in the oldest horse race known to man, across the desert to Damascus. A story of endurance and victory.
I like the old 2 & 1/2 men series on DVD.
For movie. Woody Allen's Vicky Christina Barcelona. Makes you feel like you're in Spain.
The moderators felt this thread best belonged in the social forum. Not uncommon....especially based on the title (not necessarily the content throughout the entire thread). I am set up to receive emails under certain circumstances and was informed from MH via email that the thread moved.
It seems that this string was removed from the main forum for a while. Interesting - I didn't know that could be or was ever done.
Ditto for me, what Yesidid just wrote.
So glad to hear from you Joy!!! I think the reason we all feel so emotional about you is because your struggle hits so close to home. Who among us hasn't said "This it. I'm done." then fallen back again? We want you to succeed because we know you can. I have a bachelor's degree in psychology and a master's degree in counselng but I swear my whole brain doesn't have the wisdom of Weaver's big toe. I screwed myself up on drugs over the course of a lifetime and I don't always say the right thing. Weaver and Gnarly and many others are wiser than I am but know that we all care and believe in you. Thanks for checking in. We all look forward to hearing back from you soon! God Bless.
I know you are disappointed girl. Like MsD said, make a new plan. Make it today. We will be here when you are ready.
Prayers out to you Joy!
Joy do you believe in God? I struggled and struggled with my addiction until I brought god into my heart and prayed for him to save me. It works trust me, when nothing else does and now I believe in him more than ever. Maybe that's what you need honey, trust me I know how hard it is no matter what I tried I could never stay clean. Give it a try u might be surprised! I'll be praying for him to find his way to show you he is there and that he loves you no matter what you do! Good luck to you please be careful out there!
WE All have been behind you all the way now for over a yr or maybe even almost 2. WE will never give up on you. Just keep trying and for sure hit some of those meeting right now. You know this is a disease and like any other we need help & support. I will keep you in my prayers..
Joy sorry it didn't work out as you planned. Glad you are back and alive though! Let's get this going again k honey. Make a new plan today. I'm here to help if you need support!
thank you for being kind.
Yeah I couldn't cut it this time. Maybe I didn't wait long enough before taking the sub, but when I did (18 hours or so after using, in the morning) I was still a block of sniffling lead, leaking from all ports. Ha sorry for the imagery. Anyway, then it was time to check out and when I got home I just couldn't sit right in my old haunt and pass the time with such intense cravings. I'll need to take a bigger chunk of time off work than two days.
Anyway, been beating myself up plenty, thanks for not ganging up on me.
I totally agree. I keep saying we are hear to support FIRST. Give advice Second. But not in a degrading way. It is a fine line bout experience will not work for someone else. I know Joy has struggled. It is so hard. It took me 3-4 tries to quit herpin. And when I finally did I used pills to do it. Well then I had to quit those too.
Suboxone I believe will be good for her. I really just hope joy made it through and started them fine. And is getting outpatient with it too for support and hard work. Those 2 are key.
I wanted to quit opiates for several years. The last 2 1/2 years were genuine effort and desire, but I still kept using. Science has shown that is not because I am weak or didn't really want it, I was out of control with the insanity of addiction. I see you doing the same things I did Joy and people told me I must not really care enough or want to quit. I'm sorry to say, but that was not the case. I have no judgement, I have no idea as to what you are thinking or wanting, those are deeply personal experiences. I do know one thing, if something doesn't work, try something else. For me, that something totally new was asking doctors and therapists, sober friends and family for help. I mean I had to throw my whole life on the table to break free, even though, I wanted to quit with all my being. I figured, "I'm gonna die anyway, so what do I have to lose by trying to get all the help I can?" I was embarrassed, lonely, self-defeating, but I knew I could do one thing, surrender and ask for the help I needed.
Anyway, I've been watching you a long time too, I can feel the insanity that has you trapped. I can see you want this, but I coukdnt have detoxed and I induced subs alone, in a motel room. Once on the subs, I was able to put my life together, much like Annie was saying. I simply think you need a new plan, you are not weak or immorral, I believe you truly want to quit. So, what areas gonna do different next time? I'm sorry if I am wrong and you didn't use, that is a bold assumption, but most folks who disappear, when they need the most help, have relapsed. I hope I am wrong, but either way, we are waiting to hear some news. We are still here for you, I think you k is that. Keep us posted.
You know if someone went to all the trouble of getting a room, on new years eve no less, to kick HEROIN, I don't think people should be calling her out on her phone calls and judging her. It was her and medhelp and you went and passed judgment on something you know absolutely nothing about. Joy has been here struggling for a long time and I feel like we let her down. No wonder she ran away. Sad man. I'm praying for her.
Thanks. Love your posts too.. I suppose it's time to let this one go and just hope we hear from Joy again someday.. God Bess her and all the others like her (and us) who are still out there.
Your posts are great, btw!!:)
Hey, Yes, it's weird, we are writing about her and she's not even on here. But, you're right about the cell phone but, she did make calls to get heroin w/ a pay phone and forgot the ph #. She could just as easily remembered the #. And that she could not even hang in there 24 hrs to get the subs. To me, that was very disturbing and still doesn't seem like she really wants to get clean. Hope I'm wrong, though.
You know friends I was thinking, Joy said that she had a room for two nights and said something abou paying for phone calls. I don't know how she communicates with is but it's not through a cell phone. The point is that she may be fine :-)
I think my emotions are starting to come back,I'm almost in tears when I see people trying to get clean on there first few days and see them disappear from the sight,I know how hard those first few days are for the pills and I don't even want to imagine how tough it is with heroin.
Hey girl. I agree with Yesidid above. Please let us know how you are doing hon. This is your time to shine dear girl. Enough is enough. You are so much stronger than you give yourself credit for.
Prayers and hugs!!!
I'm pulling for you Joy. I've been following your posts for over a year. When you disappear, I wonder where you are and whether or not you're still alive. Let's be honest, if you don't get on subs or methadone soon you will die. You are capable of doing this! Choose life Joy, please choose life. I know I'm a stranger to you and it makes no sense but I care. I really do. You have purpose bigger than being just another casualty of the streets. Still praying.
Hey joy I wish you would let us know how you are doing and if you started your subs, I'm really worried about you because I truly know what you are going through. Hope you made it through the 24 hours and started your sub program. I remember when I first started, I messed up and used the day before my appointment so I had to come back. But there was a bad snow storm that day so I ended up being snowed in and sick as hell at my grandparents house for 4 days it was by far the worst 4 days of my life. Maybe that's what I needed though, I'd never go back there is no high in the world worth going through all of that again. I'm praying for you honey I know you can do this! You just have to want it more than you've ever wanted anything. I know it doesn't seem like it now but someday you'll get to the point where you don't even want to ever use again. It takes a lot of working on yourself but you'll get there, you're so worth it I just hope you see that. That will help you get to where you need to be. Much love and prayers to you joy even if you didn't start and messed up we would still like to hear from you just to know you are okay. Please let us know!
Hope you are ok Joy and made it through to take the suboxone. I've never taken any non-prescription meds and honestly the idea of heroin or cocaine scares the crap out of me. I can see how fast someone can end up down that road though. I know how bad it is just with the codeine. I'm glad you are trying. Please give us an update when you can. I agree with the others here that it would help a lot to find some help like N/A.
Also just wanted to add, my friends gave you some very kind, loving comments and i think thats the reason you favour this forum for support, im glad xx