My Heart Is Broke! Can't Believe This!

[hopeless]

I hate men!

My husband and i just got into a fight, and he was saying some really nasty things to me. It ended up him telling me he isn't happy anymore, and he wants a divorce!

Sorry, i know this is not the place for this kind of conversation, but i need someone to talk to! I am sitting here crying so hard, and can't stop! My feelings are so damm hurt. I can't believe him. I have been through so damm much and he knows how depressed i have been, and then ending up in the hospital and all the sh** i have been through. You know what started it, he told me he wants me to lose weight. My God, i am not fat! I have put on a few pounds, but nothing major. I weigh 125, and all cause of the way i look he tells me ignorant things. God guys, why? My heart is broken! I take care of his kids, and i have for 8 years, i have raised them since they were 1 and 2 years old. He tells me i do nothing for him. My whole life revolves around him. This is not fair to me. I can't belive this! I would rather him just rip my heart out of my chest and stomp on it, then to have him say the things he said to me tonight. I just wanna die! I am so sick in my stomach right now, He is so damm rude! I am his wife, he is too love me for who i am, right? I went through this same sh** from my first marriage. He would tell me ignorant things and cut me down all the time. I actually started to believe what was being said to me. Now again, with this husband.

I can't take anymore sh**. I don't deserve this! People wonder why i need to take pills, see this is why? I get cut down all the time, treated like sh** and get called ignorant names. Now he wants a divorce cause i put on a few pounds.

My heart is broke, and i just wanna die right now! I have nothing, i am addicted to pills, could have died, and very depressed, and now this. What else, how much more do i have to put up with?

[hopeless]

He is supposed to support me, that is what husbands are for. I support him in everything, i am so good to him. Even when he don't deserve it! Cause he is my husband, and i am his wife, this is what we are to do for each other. OMG - he said the rudest things to me tonight! When he was saying that he wants me to lose weight i just looked at him and started to cry, he said nothing, just gave me that look like, oh well!!! Then he says, "wanna have sex"? OMG is he nuts? How can he even think like that? Wants a divorce and says nasty things says i am fat, then asks for sex....He needs help!

My heart is so friggin broke! My eyes are swelled from crying, and i just don't know what to do.

[road2recovery]

i am so sorry, you are not fat, and such a sweet person..i have talked to you many times by email and i know you have been raising his kids for a long time...i have no idea why a person would say something like that....My heart is broken for you right now..

But you know what i am not trying to be ugly , but you sent me a pic of him..And ummm he is not skinny, by far..i hope you find some humor in this...But his stomach is just like my hubbys...And i love him and would not dare say anything about it, except we joke about it..
The nerve..

BUT don't you dare let him get you to take a pill....he is not worth it...NOT!!!!!
you need to get tough, and stop letting people treat you like this...Instead of crying tell him to look in the mirror!!!  get tough..
i really am trying to think of anything right now, and maybe this is not the right thing, but i don't know what to say
STAY STRONG, Please
R2R

[hopeless]

He has said these things so many times to me in the past too...He knows it breaks my heart, and how much it hurts me. I just feel so sick right now in my stomach, i don't want to cry, i want to be tough, but how do i? When i know that my husband looks at me this way. I am not a strong person, I wish i were. I just feel so weak and depressed. This was just the icing on the cake for me.

Yes, he does have a belly on him, and when i tell him that, all he does is say " yep, and proud of it". He is such an as*...

You know something, my birthday is on Sunday, and i swear to God, he does this every year on my birthday. I can't remember the last time we didn't fight on my b-day. That disgusts me!

I don't ask for much out of life, i really don't! I just want someone to love me for me, for who i am. Why can't i ever have that? Why does this always happen to me?  

[hopeless]

I found a pill....and i took it! I don't give a sh**  anymore.
Why should i?

[hopeless]

Maybe he is right, all i am is a piece of sh**

[hopeless]

I am leaving, going for a ride......need to clear my head and get out of this house!

Bye guys.......Sorry!

[lonote]

Hon you are not fat.He has issues. Don't let the guys set the stage for you to mind f--- yourself. What I see when I see your picture is a beautiful fragile young woman. Honey slow down, Some how you have to calm yourself down. Tomorrow he'll prob sorry for all the shyt he said tonight. You have to be strong, and what ever you do please don't use. Talk to us all you need to. Don't go away. Stay till you calm down. It will be okay. I promise it will.   Cathy

[PromisedLand]

No you are not a piece of sh**.  From your picture and your words you are a beautiful woman and you don't deserve this treatment from this "man".  He should be there beside you as you struggle with all of your issues.  I have my issues and my wife has hers, and I stand right beside her and encourage her and support her.  That is what this "man" should be doing...no, Hopeless...YOU are not a piece of sh**


Jim

[hopeless]

Wish he was as sweet as you are.

Thank you for saying that to me!

[blueyz]

Hope~

I remember when I first came on this site, I saw a couple of peeps profiles who I was talking with and I remember thinking..Wow, what a beautiful woman!  You are and as I've gotten to know you, only thru posts of course, I realize you are just as beautiful inside as you are on the outside.

Sometimes men can say the most hurtful stupid *** **** and it will cut us to the core.  There is no excuse for his behavior.  I will say that it seems he has some pent up anger and issues that he needs to deal with.  Maybe something related to your addiction or recent hospital stay that he feels he can't say to you so instead he lets it build up and it manifests itself in pure ugliness.  It probably scared the begeeberz out of him when you were in the hospital and we all know how med deal with vulnerability...(disclaimer...not ALL men) But you see where I'm getting at with this.  

Hopefully you guys can talk when things are cooled off and you can ask what's REALLY on his mind.

Prayers and hugs floating your way!

[hopeless]

maybe someday i will find a man who loves me for who i am.

i will be back, need to leave this house for awhile. Can't be here with him.

[FLaddict]

YOU TOOK A PILL!!!!! Geez... I am actually shocked for once... after reading your posts from last week.. one would think you would be afraid to die... I guess this confirms the definition of addiction..
continuing to do something despite harm to yourself or others...

[lonote]

Honey, you can't get everyone all upset for you , and say you used and cut out like this..I got to give you some tough love here sweetie. Its not fair to the others out here struggling. When you feel like your going to go off the deep end email me anytime. I check it on the hour practically 24/7 cause of
my son at sea. Now you have the place in an uproar worring about you. Hon, just the other day you were offering help to others. Hon do you take an anti depressant? I do, and it really helps on stay on an even keel. You know I care about you girl!

[FLaddict]

Don;t go out.. stay and talk... you need to talk not isolate..

[beach777]

I can't help but reach out to you. You can't see the forest for the trees but you have your own strength inside of you. Find it. You're caught up in the pills/bad relationship and I fear a beautiful person is committing slow suicide virtue bad relationship/bad decisions......your husband is NOT supporting you. YOU are worth so much more. I worry about you.....you're in a crisis....you will see the light....do not let him bring you down....look up "passive aggressive behavior" under google. He's doing that to you. Above all else, self preservation. I'm sure you love him but two drowning people can not save each other. I am here. I will help you. Tell me what you need.....just do NOT self destruct...you're too young, too pretty, too much potential.....get through this and everything will be alright....time for you to take care of you. I know you hear that s**t all the time but there's more to it than that.........I'm in a better place. Let me help you if I can.....

[hopeless]

He does let things build up, he don't complain hardly ever, but then from letting it all build up, BOOM he really explodes! This happens a few times a year. So i know what you are saying. But still, he knows what i am going through and how depressed i have been, and he knows that he really can hurt my feelings by saying  i am fat. There is no excuse, now he wants a divorce? Tomorrow, yes he will talk to me like everything is fine, like nothing happend, this is what he does! But i am not going to blow it off this time. My heart can't take it anymore. I am sick of being put down, all that i do for that man, and his kids. It's not fair to me to gt treated this way!

I am sick of being the good girl i am sick of giving in all the time and i am sick of being treated like this. He knows i am a very weak girl. It is time for me to turn into a bit**...No more nice girl for me! I am done! It don't get me anywhere in life, so from now on i will be known as the bit**...

[hopeless]

Sorry Ionote,

I will keep this to myself, i knew this wasn't the place to talk about my personal problems!

[road2recovery]

Stay here and talk with everyone..Don't go ride...Think of your son right now..Please...Do not take another pill, he is not worth it...BUT you and your son are ...
r2r

[lonote]

Atta girl, you didn't leave. Just don't drop a bomb and leave. too many ppl want to talk you thru this. Be a bit--. You prob make a good one lol I say with love and respect. Theres an art to being a good bit--. Stay with us. I know the drill, and the next day they act like nothing happened.

[hopeless]

Thank you, everything you said is true.

If i need anything, i will ask you.

I do need to go get some fresh air now though. When he goes to bed, i will be back!

Thanks again,
Hope

[lonote]

No girl I didn't mean that. Talk all you want, just don't cut out. Too many ppl worry and want to help.

[hopeless]

I will email you later, if i can...

Thanks girl...

[lonote]

Promice you will come back and not take any pills. liver liver liver liver

[hopeless]

Ok,

Sorry Cathy....

He is yelling, i gotta go....Need to get outta here for a bit.

I will be back!