Addiction: Social Community
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Avatar universal

Old "friends" won't quit calling

This guy from my old self days won't quit messaging me!!  I told him I'm sober now but he just won't stop!  I did things I am not at all proud of with him. He just won't stop. I'm afraid to tell my hubby, but he just won't stop!  Dorry, I just had to vent
22 Responses
Avatar universal
Can you change your number ? when we break free we need to change many things and a phone number is small compared to what we do change.. It makes it more difficult when we allow our past to crowd our present.. Congrats on Breaking Free.. lesa
Avatar universal
It would be pretty hard for me. I have A LOT of my clients who call me on this #. I might have to though. It would just me a huge hassel
Avatar universal
What are you concerned about with this guy? Are you worried he will retaliate in some fashion? Tell him to get lost and never bother you again.  Your Sobriety should be the most important thing to you right now. I know from experiance that people like that want you back where you were, they care nothing for your well being and never did. All that want is what you can do for them, nothing more.

Good Luck...
271792 tn?1334979657
It may be a hassle but if it stands in the way of your staying clean, then what choice do you have? If you are with a major carrier, you can add a feature that allows you to block numbers. You may want to take the route if changing your number is too much trouble.
Avatar universal
Ii don't think he would do anything. But it's just stressin me out.  If he were to say/do smthing it would just ruin me....
Avatar universal
That's a good idea...i'll check into blocking it
1525404 tn?1291914516
I told my guy that I was being "watched"  and was pretty sure my phone records were being looked at. I spent a lot of money with this guy, yet I sure haven't heard a word from him since. Didn't imply I was snitching or anything like that, just that I thought someone had snitched on me.
Avatar universal
Our arrangement was shamefuly different so I don't think that would work. The thought just makes me sick. Anyhoo....hopefully he'll eventually stop
1047946 tn?1332608029
I know with most carriers you can create an online account and control many features and one of the features is blocking calls. I know verizon now has it and they were one of the last ones to get it. All you have to do is type in the numbers you want to block. The block is good for 30 days and then expires but you just have to update the blocked numbers again. If you have any of the major carriers such as sprint, at&t, us cellular, verizon, etc they all have it.
Avatar universal
Sure you could change your number or block his, or you have some fun with this problem. For example every time he calls ask him to borrow at least 1000 dollars cuz you got a "system" for the craps table that just cant loose or ask him to go to an amway meeting with you. Or ask him what his favorite book of the old testament is and then insist on reading yours to him right then, I suggest Leviticus, but hey it's up to you. Or you could tell him you got popped with an ounce of coke and the DA's office is trying to get you to roll on anyone you can for a lighter sentence, and your not sure what to do, then immediately ask him to confirm his address. All kidding aside just tell him to get the he!! out of your life. You'll be glad you did.
Avatar universal
Nice....he seems to have atleast stopped for the day. We'll see. If it doesn't stop i will take action. Either block or change #. Thanks you guys
1563022 tn?1296332599
Kelseago - My cell is my business phone too, I know what your saying. I went through the same thing. They are persistant bastards when you have cash to spend. The sobriety "thing" never worked for me, they still hassled me. They will go away after you don't buy, it takes a little time. Although the post about reading the Bible to him sounds like a good one. Hang in, they will fill your shoes soon enough...unfortunatley.
935907 tn?1296069836
As you know by now people,places, and things are to be changed immediately if you want any type of sobriety and clean time. Its all in your hands, I cannot tell you what to do. If you want it bad enough then you will do something to change, if not then you will be your ol self coasting in the sea of life, just coasting and getting by. Good luck and follow your instincts please, god bless, mike in nc
Avatar universal
I have moved, 3 hours away actually. I am making new, clean, friends. I'm doing everything that I can think of.
Avatar universal
Does he have something on you that he's threatening to tell your husband about?  Would he likely show up if he couldn't get you on the phone?
Avatar universal
Well, he doesn't know where I live. I've been honest, pretty much, about my bad drug behavior. I'm not too worried abt that. It's just very stressfull. He does have a lo on me, but I'm not concerned abt that. I just hope he never finds where I live.
1416133 tn?1351123217
You BLOCK his no.  There are no choices here.  And if he shows up at your house, you call the POLICE.  End of story.  There's no gray area here.  NONE.
Avatar universal
Why are you afraid to tell your husband?
Avatar universal
Because of things I have done and been done to me that I'm not proud of. He basically knows and would prob go balistic on this guy
Avatar universal
I promos, lies & 1/2 truths will only make things worse!!!  i just ruined my marriage because i was not honest with my wife.. Please dont make that mistake...
Avatar universal
I'm not. I've been fairly honest. He's accepted things that have happened. He doesn't want full details. Neither of us have been perfect. We have chosen to let the past be just that, the past. We are moving forward. He just hates to see me in pain about past things that have happened. Maybe it's just my addict mind thinking I'm protecting him. Idk. He quit calling though
Avatar universal
Today was the first day I turned my phone on since "D Day" on Saturday.  Once again I am so thankful for this forum and the people in it with their advise and experience. My first call was a "do you have?, can you get?, can I borrow? WHAT CAN YOU DO FOR ME!!"  call and it set me off immediately.  And that came after I told them that I quit! I have no intentions of changing my number as I've had it since my cell phone was in a carry bag that plugged into my car. (some of you might remember those)  What is a good response for these people that just don't get it and want to keep you in the gutter with them?????
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