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On road to recovery but slipped major!

Hi there,

I'm in a relationship with a beautiful girl who I've been with for close to 2 years. I can honestly say, things are great, we have our ups and downs but generally things are good.

I'm currently battling a porn addiction which my partner is aware of to a certain degree.

My issue is I got drunk recently, whilst I didn't cheat on my girlfriend, I found myself on a website advertising escorts. I didn't do anythin else but it frightened me to think I may have been close to hurting myself and my partner. I don't think I would of done anything it was more the inital excitement.

I also took cocaine with friends. This was so out of character as I never normally do this.

I came home drunk and upset and I relapsed into pornography again. I decided to quit porn in October. I've watched porn approximately 4 or 5 times since October as I'm attempting to quit. I haven't done it since but I feel beat up. I find it hard to look or even speak to my partner.

I feel she deserves better than me. She always sticks by by me. I feel like I keep letting her down.

Any advice would be helpful?

Regards.
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