i am so sorry to hear this. i will definetly keep you and your wife and family in my prayers. stay strong..she needs you.
Oh , your poor wife! that is just terrible.
chronic pain does make one very unhappy. it is physically exhausting and totally depressing.
maybe someone should take the daughter out back and rough her up a little (lol)
i am just kidding but really, she is 19 and not a child anymore. and should not be treated like one. what is done is done and that is in the past and not going on anymore and no excuse to take it out on her mother. and not good to keep it around still, it is not healthy to keep living in that past reminder.
does the daughter not remember how unfair or horrible it felt to not be treated well?
how are you doing through all of this?
You and your wife are in my prayers also. Tough situation to be in but i am glad you are there for her. Stay strong sara
Lifting you and your family up...
It is unfortunate your wife is having physical and mental issues, and I hope she gets the help she needs. I also find it heart breaking that both of her daughters are victims of physical and sexual abuse from the hands of their biological father. Victims of sexual abuse have so much anger and self loathing, the unhealthy emotions, guilt and anger are endless. I found it heart breaking for someone to suggest taking an abused child "out back, to be taught a lesson". The ramifications of sexual abuse for a child do not magically disappear at 19 or 29 without intensive counseling.
I hope and pray your entire family receives the help and therapy requred so all may begin to heal.
Thank you...she (daughter) has been seeing a psych, but quit going, and refuses to take any more meds, though the difference in her is night and day when she does take them..instead, she smokes a lot of pot and hangs out with some loser friends, won't keep a job and is generally a mess. Sometimes, she seems to know it..no, being "taken out back" is not the solution for her..
thanks all for the prayers..
what Llardro said about Victims of sexual abuse have so much anger and self loathing, the unhealthy emotions, guilt and anger are endless.. That statement is so true, your wife also must suffer with these same emotions as it happened on her watch.. I and my mom have lived the life, I finally wanted the help to get past my past... At 51 I was able to dislodge a lot of guilt and an overwhelming amount of anger, hopefully the reasons for addictions for over 30 years I started at 12 and was a Heroin addict at 16. So please do not give up on your daughter, and I commend you for the loving support you give your wife... You will all be in my prayers... Lesa
I will keep you and your family in my daily prayers.Peace.
Please look into Cymbalta. It's to treat pain and depression associated with pain. It has worked wonders for Magi. Unfortunatley not everyone can take it (me), but might be worth looking into. Sending you and your wife tons of good energy and prayers. Hugs, Mary
Thank you allaboutmary...I will suggest that.
will try to write more later
I'm sorry for your troubles...I'll send some good thoughts your way...
Jim im so sorry the family is going through this right now, all of you. I hope things improve and everyone gets the help they need
Chronic pain on top of the heartache that our children can sometimes bring can be overwhelming to say the least..I unfortunately am dealing with that too..it can really drag you so deep in depression..the gulit the anger..all of it.
Your family will be in my prayers..~Lisa
I'm sorry, the last I will say on this subject, however I hope to God you have someone to help those two babies that were sexually and physically abused by their biological father rather than seeing them as "abhorant or out of control teens".......... this thread is mind boggling to me, and one that I chose to leave, as the posts are too disturbing for me to say the least.
I hope to God you all get the help you need, and that is for your entire family, that has unfortunately been permanently (in most cases) scarred by their past.
you got it, sweetheart...
i'm so, so sorry you going through this.
i hope your wife will consider getting some help if she isn't currently. because at the end of the day, she has no control over your daughter... we can't control anyone.
but i imagine her heart must be breaking.. both of yours. as well as your daughters. people CAN get through this kind of trauma, but it does take alot of work. and I'm not sure there's alot you can do but keep suggesting she (your daughter) get that help. but i'm sure you already know this...
if it helps to know, my sister just went through over a 6 month total spiral, complete psychotic break from bi-polar disorder, but now (she hit bottom - and realized she could go down no further) she is medicated, getting help, and is a completely new person. I have my sister back. so Bear, there is hope...
you will ALL be in my prayers tonight.
stay strong, sweetheart...
My wife had the girls in counseling for several years after she found out about the abuse that had taken place..It did help them..as they get older it has taken a big toll on them, the most probably on our youngest, 19. She has turned to drugs, hanging out with the "wrong crowd" and has exhibited what I would say are "bipola" symptoms. she was seeing a counselor and pshychiatrist for severar months and suddenly quite qoing. the meds she was on helped. She was hospitalized for several days for therapy and seemed to be making a turnaroud until she was booted out for breaking the rules..smoking a cigarette. We have sought all the help we can for her because she is a fragile/naive young woman seemingly intent on desruction and we feel that it is going to get worse for her...she has resorted to stealing jewlery from her mother and othef items to "pawn" for money for drugs.and we at that time told her we were not going to continue watching her destroy her life and if that was what she wanted to do, she'd have to find somwhere else to do it...she moved out for a few days but we took her back (long story..perhaps can go into that later.
This note was requests for prayer for my wife...who has survived breast cancer only to be left in tremendous pain after undergoing latflap resonstruction..this has gone on for 3 years and thd doctor who performed the surgery is at a loss as to why..she's seen a number of doctors noneof whom seem to be able to help...she's also had serious vision problems..she lost an eye at age 14, and has for hte last 10 years has been suffereing with diminsished vision in her remaining eye (retinal rleated) That seems to have the dotors baffled..she's seen some of the best eye professionals in Bostono wjho have seen and treated her, but cannot seem to come up with a diagnosis...
It's the sress of all of this, plus wht is going on with her daugher that has sdded to the stress that has left her an emotional mess...shei is having a bertter day today (though
is quite angryi wiith her daughter and at a loss s to ehat to do next.
Hi bear. I'm so sorry you and yours are going thru a difficult time. My prayers with you and your family.
So sorry to hear about your wife and what you're going through in life at this time. My heart sincerely goes out to you. I will say a prayer for your wife and continue to keep her in my prayers until she is well. Don't forget to look after yourself with all of this going on. I know we sometimes do forget ourselves, especially when someone we love is hurting.
In fact, I'll pray for your whole family, so please keep us posted.
Big hug & prayers for you, 'this, too shall pass",
I have never been a praying man but I will be with you in spirit and thought and in the hope that all will be well for you and your wife in the near future.