BETZ

[shelby74]

I am here - you still around?

[BETZ]

Hey there....Montana?  wow.  I never knew anyone from there before, well, except my father-in-law was from there.....i forgot.  LOL
but that's the only other person besides you.

I just hate the way the sleeping meds make me feel the next day.  I have ambien and i take one of those (not every night) but i also have these transodones that are a tranquilizer but they aren't good for anything but to be knocked out.......I take 2 of those and the next day i feel horrible.  I haven't had to use either one of them until i stopped this hydro stuff again....those things kept me snoozing all the time.

Glad to hear i am not the only one trying to hide things.  Aside from hiding this stuff from my husband i am also hiding some major financial woes too......Lord have mercy, I am stressed to the max.

You forgot to tell me about how to get my name on the left side of the page....LOL
now who else has a memory problem?  Are you 2 or 3 hours behind the east coast?  We are 8:30 here now.

Be back probably one more time before i try to head for bed and put myself out of this misery.....
Oh yeah, did i tell you i took up smoking again 2 days ago?  hadn't smoked in a real long time but thought i needed a crutch....so, i went back to that......it was either that or alcohol and beings i am a diabetic, the alcohol was out.  anyway, now it is too dang hot to stand outside and smoke....and i have asthma to boot....so stupid, stupid me....but i will go get another laser treatment soon as i am over this withdrawl and quit smoking again.......that's easy.  I have to smoke outside....nobody knows i am doing that again either....LOL
My 81 year old mom lives with us and i keep things from my husband a lot so we don't end up fighting in her presence....i don't wanna upset her.  It's hard to do but i do it.

TTYL........Thanks again for being there for me......You have a real good night just in case i don't happen to get back on here but i probably will once more....it's hard to stay off this website isn't it?

[shelby74]

You are going through the toughest part as you know right now.  It will pass soon!  You hang in there.  I KNOW it's difficult but you sound very motivated!  At about a week I was feeling pretty ok - energy was not great but most of the other junk had passed.  Then you have some emotional stuff for awhile.  Talking about how I was feeling at any given moment really helped me.  I was on here constantly.  And I will be again - well actually I am now! LOL  

Don't worry about the memory part - that is very typical.  I was using for 10 years and I am 33.  I live in Montana.  So I have almost sucked a third of my life to using.  

Your spouse does not know?  Nor does mine.  Why do you not want to take the sleep meds?  This would be a good time to take them I would think.  Do you have only a limited supply?

I am praying for you!

shel

[BETZ]

Hey, i think it is safe to talk for a short while.  I wanted to know also, how do i get my name over to the far left?  everytime it ends up over on the right.  Now i know i have done this before but i can't remember what i did to get it over there.  Thanks for your help.  As you might figure, my mind is not working too good....especially right now.
I tell ya, i took 90 hydros last week....in one week.  That's when i knew i was in deep trouble and after they were gone i said nooooo more.  i can't keep doing this to myself.  So, tomorrow is day 3.
Hope i start getting better within a week anyway.  Last year i went off of the hydros and on the 6th day i felt soooo good i remember e-mailing a friend telling her i felt so darn healthy.....well, why did i mess up again?  i will not say never cuz that is a scary word, but i truly don't intend to use again.....
If i tell the doctor not to give them to me, then i won't be getting them.  I go back to him on Aug. 22 and i hope by then i feel like a whole new gal.

Thanks again for answering me so quickly.....by the way, i am 59 and live in the Indianapolis area....just in case you were interested in knowing that.  Shoot, i might have already told you that.....forgive me.  LOL

God bless.  I will be off and on here all evening i suppose....I can't sleep.  I have sleep meds but i don't wanna take them this early.

[BETZ]

hey, i had to take my dogs out.....boy is it ever hot.  thanks for getting back to me.  I might have to wait a little bit until my husband goes back upstairs before i can talk.....but i will be back!  
How are you doing?

[shelby74]

I am hanging in there.  I saw your post and wanted to make sure you were ok.  Post when you can.

[shelby74]

I will check back in a few minutes to check on you.