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Avatar universal

This is really lame...

...and i really never thought id be here. Formerly anti-pill and such. Long story short. I have several ailments that cause me pain on a regular basis. Lower back, and kidney stones.
I also have a doc that i can get pain pills from, Lorset, 10/650s. i have gone thru episodes of on and off usage of this lorcet. It does indeed help my pain, but, when being honest with myself, i know i use this **** recreationaly. I.e., ive taken them, when i dont hurt. ut, i also know ive taken them, when i dont. I know everyone will laugh, when i say that right now, im using 30mg a day max, buti really dont want to get much further. After reading a lot of other threads from her and elsewhere last night, i haven't taken anything in over 24 hours. I feel fluish, but not that bad. I feel lucky, and that my self consciousness has  ....you know what...i feeel ******* stupd for even posting this considering the hell that you peopl eare going thru...cause i can feel the edge of the sword...i have 6 pills left..and thats it fo rme...i might take one to get me thru the night k. I have a script for 5 more refills but thats not my problem..if thay arent in the house im good...and i wont get a refill fo  what i have...

GOD BLESS>
19 Responses
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356054 tn?1218552475
your name says it all. Read it and believe it and do it. Keep doing what your doing and you will be changing that name. I promise. 3 pills a day is plenty to be addicted. like you said you take them even when not in pain. You have answered alot of your own questions and the fact is your hooked. Stop now so you can say notme.
Helpful - 0
390416 tn?1275185087
That's how I started, low and recreationally.
Somehow...it got out of control..if you stay w/ it long enough...it will continue to escalate.
Stop now while you're ahead. I didn't hit bottom w/ the pills like I did w/ alcohol, but i know i would have eventually gotten there had I continued to use! Good luck!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Ok,

Sorry about last night.., isnt that a movie???

I have used Lorcet off and on as needed for pain for about 2 years. Ive had spans of months at a time without. Ive never taken more than 3 a day during this time, for fear of addiction. I think the problem i have now, is that I will have a legit need, but once i get that bottle filled, i dont stop till they are all gone. Even on days when the pain is manageable, ill take them prophylactically,  even when i know i should only use them if im actually in BAD pain. thus,, i know im abusing them, albeit on a minor scale...but its abuse none the less.

I dont want the problem to get worse. As i said (belligerently) last night, I got a script for 60 filled 1/10. Ive got 4 left.  
I know the WDs at this level are really minor, but they are still there. Im really pissed at myself, for caving last night, after 36 hours without. I thought having a drink would calm my nerves, but it weakened my resolve. Anyway, this script is almost gone. Ill probably get it filled again at some point, but when i do, im giving it to my wife to keep.  I know i wont ask her for a pill unless i need it, and that  she wont give it to me unless i need it. She'd be the 1st to stop me, if she thought there was an issue. Maybe not the best option, but better than having them in my total control.
Helpful - 0
352798 tn?1399298154
No one here thinks that a lower dosage is nothing. Any amount that you are hooked on is a problem. It is so much better for you to catch this early on. These pills steal life from you. They show no mercy. You are not a dweeb. You are smart to see this so early on. Just remember this. The pills want you back. they will be calling you out. They will seek you in false pain, physical and emotional. They will try to persuade you to use them at every turn. Yes, it is like they have their own agenda. You will get free and feel really good. Don't lose your guard. 30 or 60 days later, they come back knocking on your door. Am I exaggerating? Not really. The mental battle is real. Hopefully, you will be spared because you are smart to admit this so early. I am just wanting you to be aware of the tricks that are played on you by these pills.
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
It was just in June or July of this last year that i was happy on 3 a day...could manage anyway...I am up to 6-8 now///well not now as I am tapering
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
how long have you been taking them...?  and it's never a "mild addiction"....that is justl,...hate to say it and i could be wrong but it sounds like a little bit of denial. if you havent been taking them for too long then it shouldn't be too awful to come off of..or at least shouldn't last too long. all the best
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
your probably right

im just glad i found this forum...i do feel ike a dweeb bitching about a mild addiction...but i fear the monster thats waiting for me...im gonna try and avoid him...

i hate to benefit from others misfortune, but, reading others stories has hleped me.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
hmmm i think it's more of a problem then you think.  Just my opinion.

Nauty................go hillary!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
enemy..

thanks...im done, thanks ytou
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
ok. i caved. wife called all happy and ****. i took a 10mg pill...prolonged my stupid easy dtox...
Helpful - 0
372416 tn?1242665752
That's not bad.  Only 3 a day.  This shouldn't be too hard for you.  You haven't developed a life w/pills like a lot of us have.   Like me......6 years.  U're lucky to stop now.  

We might be clean, but now have to learn to live all over again without the dope.  

Glad you wrote us, so you could see where you might be headed if you don't stop!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
but...ive  had the same...many tmes before...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
enemy,

Its been a weird cycle. But right now. I had a script for 60 10/650 filled 1/10, and i have 6 left.  lite weight
Helpful - 0
372416 tn?1242665752
How long have you taken lorcet w/o stopping?

Good for U not to drink & do drugs.  I was bad about that.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thanks
i need to flush these pills...ive been over 24 hrs without...but i had a drink to calm my nerves, which worked to some extent, but now i feel i need one last ******* pill....i have 6...once they are gone..i know i can stay off till i have an attack. even thn, i may just deal with it.
Helpful - 0
306455 tn?1288862071
Don't feel stupid for posting. Its great you want to be done with this before it turns your life into hell. And if your useing other than prescribed then you will be in the same spot the rest of us are, if you don't stop now.  
Keep posting and let us know how your doing. If you have questions or just want to vent, we're here for you.
Magi
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
...lol...looking at my original post..i sound very ignorant. I have to post the disclaimer, that i am drinking right now...
I also have to say, that when i was using Lorcet, that i DID NOT drink.. A fact that my wife really noticed. Anyway, the stupid sounding language is due to my drinking at this tim,e.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thanks man...
i know its so minor...but its crazy how quick **** can get out of control. I fell im on the ******* edge of a razor blade.
Helpful - 0
352798 tn?1399298154
You should be able to kick this without a whole lot of trouble. The next few days will be rough but doable. I wouldn't take anymore. That will just prolong the withdrawals. Good luck. Keep posting.
Helpful - 0
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