I'm a sophmore in college at CU-Boulder with a very demanding schedule. I'm a math major and, on average, spend over 20 hours studying for my math exams now that I have reached the upper-division courses. I've never had a great attention span but still did well (3.75+) throughout high school with minimal effort. However, upon reaching college I had to study far more than I ever did before and still wasn't receiving the grades I used to. So freshman year up until last semester, I dabbled with adderall. I mostly used it the days before tests or finals week when I had to cram, largely in part to procrastination, and never really felt any lingering effects the days after.
This semester I have been a lot more efficient with studying and have been doing way better than previous semesters but have been taking adderall more often and am starting to feel some lingering effects. Where last year I only needed 10-20 mgs to study, I'm now starting at 20 mgs and moving on from there if necessary. My major concern with this has been the amount I've taken in the last week or so. I've been taking it almost every day now and although I'm getting far ahead in studying for finals, I've been convincing myself that I need it to study. Also, last Thursday, after taking 40 mgs and studying all evening, I went out with some friends to a party and really liked how it helped me socialize with people since I'm usually more introverted and have hard times connecting with people I don't know. I liked it so much I took adderall Saturday night as well and had a good time out at parties.
Today is the first day in a while where I haven't taken any adderall, partly due to the fact that I ran out, partly due to the fact that I took 50 mgs last night and studied up until 5AM, and have been feeling really drowsy, foggy and just not like I used to. I'm starting to worry that I've developed a dependency that will hurt not just my body, but my studying and grades as well. Anyone out there whose gone through a similar story with any advice?