Another day clean! Still w/d headaches & crying

[BelleFemme]

I just want to thank you all for being so supportive. I still have a long way to go. As an athlete an injury could come any time, but know I can be honest with my doctor about opiates. I also have a place to go for great support.:) the w/d has not been terrible, just a headache that is almost unbearable. I do not know if it is my body, tapering, or the worse is to come. I have always had perfect blood pressure, but my hubby is going to go buy a cuff today to have at home. Reading here I have learned my blood pressure could rise. I had the infamous restless legs last night. Did not get a wink of sleep. Taking all vitamins, going to walk around my house today since it is big. My head hurts too much to be out much now. I am taking it a day at a time. Thank you! Oh I am crying at EVERYTHING...is that normal?

[FourJays]

Great news on the BP!  Another day clean for you is awesome . . . your ARE doing this girl!!!  I'm so happy for you; soon all of this physical w/d stuff should be fading away and the small windows of light will start to break through; more and more each day.  You have a new, clean, pill free life to look forward too . . . and you SO deserve this!  Keep it up and keep us posted ok?

Julie

[clean_in_ks]

SOOO glad you are o.k.  And what a peach of a hubby you have!!!
You are blessed for sure....and you sound good in spite of all you've been thru.....You are doing GREAT, girl~

[BelleFemme]

Forgot to tell you my blood pressure was perfect the entire time at the hospital, thank God. Have a good night. Tomorrow is another day clean!

[BelleFemme]

Thank you so much! He has been even more supportive than I could have wanted. Running around getting every vitamin, anything to help me through my detox...and now recovery...I was beyond freaked out, I was begging my hubby to call my mom, I thought I was going to die. Here I was taking the pain for 3 days thinking it was just lingering withdrawals...smh... Oh I just keep crying..movies, commercials...every time my mom or husband tells me how proud they are.... I need some laughter too, which my sister is great for...:) thank you so much!

[BelleFemme]

Hi Vicki! Total miracle...I do not even want to think about what would have happened if I was sleep..haha, do not have to worry about sleep yet, lol...doing great so far, but still trouble with sleep. I have a rare headache disorder called Clusters. They usually effect men and only 1 or 2 % of the population. They did tell me a blood vessel burst in my nose, which caused all the bleeding. I live in Southern California , but the weather has been overcast, not hot. As for the slight swelling, no idea. Hopefully once I see the neurologist all my ? Will be answered. I took it easy today and hubby is calling for me to get in bed and watch a movie. I feel bad for him, I know I keep him up all night, but he will not let me go in one of the guest bedrooms. I think he is scared. Thank you so much...I am not letting this stop my days. I had to ask my hubby , I stopped counting after that ordeal...

[selfinduced]

Your husband sounds like a doll! So glad your on the mend. That had to freak you out on top of already having fragile emotions. Hey, cry all you want.Crying actually released seratonin and helps get your brain level. YAY, on your progress.

[vicki595]

It's a miracle you're here!!  How scary for you!   Do they have any idea what caused this?  

I hope you're taking it easy tonight and for the next several days...Glad you're okay!

[BelleFemme]

Thank you so much. It was so scary.. I just thought it was from w/ds!! Can you imagine?? I knew it felt wrong. After all the nose bleeding, my husband and I went right away. I have had them on and off, since all the trauma I wrote about on my very first post, but nothing like that. I have an appointment with Neurology and they are going to control them when I have them. The good thing is they absolutely do not use narcotics to treat chronic headaches. My ex is a neurosurgeon and said that is standard protocol. I still have a headache, but not like before. Other than that I feel pretty good :D Still lethargic, but I know that is normal. Sleepy, but cannot sleep. Could be MUCH worse. I know. I cannot believe how supportive he has been. Taking time off from his demanding work to be at home with me. I see him in a new way, though we are newlywed, lol. Thank you. All this support makes me stronger and makes me know I can do it. Changing my doctor to a DO. This particular doctor is totally holistic, does not like pain pills, etc. How are you feeling and doing? All my prayers to you. I am starting to see the sun through the clouds!

[FourJays]

OMG thank Goodness you went to the ER, and that your husband was there.  How scary . . .so sorry you had to go through that.  So you are OK now?  Is there anything you can do to prevent these in the future?  At least now you know to never second guess that symptom again!  SO thankful you are OK and wow, you are lucky - your hubby sounds really awesome.  And GREAT job on saying no to the percs - I am really proud of you!  Just make sure you take care of yourself and if anything at else comes up that doesn't feel right I would go right back there.  Don't want to take any chances - you are working SO hard for this new, clean life - you deserve to be able to enjoy every single minute of it.  How are you feeling now, any of the other w/d stuff still giving you trouble, or are you starting to feel better?

[BelleFemme]

You are too sweet! How are things going for you? Are you doing okay? Thank you so much. One day at a time, right? Staying positive...you all mean so much! We are all supporting each other and that is a beautiful thing!

[BelleFemme]

Hey! When you read above you will see how tough the weekend was....thanks for checking on me. How are you? The rls lasted for just that one night thankfully... I am still crying though, lol. My family had a prayer circle for me when I got home from the hospital... I feel stronger.. You are so right. Muscle memory :). I am going to rest today and then go for a walk on the beach tomorrow. Whoever said it never rains in Southern California lied, lol...my appetite is iffy. I am 5'6 110, so I really cannot lose weight...I am vegan, so my hubby bought small veggie and fruit packs for me with peanut butter. Soy protein drinks too...I have IBS, but it has not bothered me much..my mom, husband are definitely helping to support and hold me accountable, but I am going to look for meetings in my area...spiritually I am covered...that is what is REALLY getting me through.... I am so lucky to have found you all!! Thank you...am always praying for you!

[BelleFemme]

Thank you so much! Remember those bad headaches? I just tried to ride it out then at 3:00 am Sunday morning I woke up in so much pain, I knew it was something other than w/ds. I went downstairs to get an ice pack, was super dizzy, then blood just gushed from my nose! I was freaked out. My husband rushed me to the e.r. and after multiple tests, c.t., etc. a blood vessel had burst, and I had slight swelling of the brain. I had issues in the past with headaches, but was diagnosed with clusters, which thankfully uses NO narcotics. I completely fainted when I got there, woke up already on an IV, but at least I know it was not w/d, and if I waited my brain would have totally swelled and I could have been a goner! I was so concerned about what they put in the IV. My husband told me not to worry about that, just to keep focused on not taking pills. He bought me beautiful flowers today and wrote in a card how much he loves me and proud he is of me :). I refused the Percocet to take home...yay! I adore you ladies, you get me through...

[knaankj]

ive been thinking about you! im glad you posted today! sounds like you are hanging in there and that is WONDERFUL!!
i hope things settle down for you here really soon.
congrats on getting clean....you are really encouraging and inspiring others to do the same!!
keep up the great work!!
Paige

[EvolverU]

Hey! Glad to see you posting again, Thanks!
Yes, being 'all over the place' emotionally is absolutely 'normal'. I know that the 'infamous' - (good one, btw)  - and the no sleep are rough but just ride it out. RLS is usually only an acute symptom and will pass before you know it.
It's great that you're an athlete. That will help as you'll feel restless w/o exercise. The body never forgets - is what I've always found. I was a gymnast and stayed in shape later on and I know that I'd be in rougher shape now, if it weren't for that.
Are you eating? How's everything else? Any gut issues?
Do you have any thoughts on how you're going to build a post-acute w/d 'framework' to keep yourself clean and 'witnessed' ? (i.e. Meetings, therapy, spirituality, etc.?)
You're doing wonderfully. So glad to see you back today. Hold fast!

[FourJays]

Yes, all of what you are feeling is normal - and you are doing great.  Blood pressure is certainly something you should monitor and if it gets too high I would call your doctor.  But some increase during w/d is normal.  Have you already been told about Clonidine?  It's a BP med that many people say helped them a lot during detox and withdrawal.  I did not use it, but didn't know about it  I have heard that it helps with w/d symptoms in general as well as controls BP.  It is an rx med so you would need to call your doctor about it.  The headaches - have you had problems with these before, or is this just since you quit the opiates?  Oh, and how is the bump on your tounge; has that gotten better?  Walking, getting any exercise is a great idea too.  And the crying - I was an emotional MESS for that first week or so.  It should start to lessen as the days go by.  If it continues to be a problem after a couple weeks there are many natural supplements and things you can try.  For now it sounds to me like you are doing everything right.  Try to get some fresh air and some exercise.  Every little bit helps.  You are doing great I think, keep it up; should NOT be long before you start feeling better; a little more each day :))