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Avatar universal

Can someone give me advice please? My fiance is badly sick and I'm so scared!

I'm in desperate need of help and advice right now. My precious fiance has been so sick and we don't know what's wrong! He has been through an extremely, extremely stressful time in his life where we had to take care of his parents, and his siblings are so very awful and purposely made this process as hard on him as they could....he was honoring his parents' wishes to stay in their home till they died and he saw to that- without the help of his sisters. My poor honey's heart has just been broken so badly and trounced on....too much. His dad died last June and his mom finally had to be taken to a memory care facility, and he basically feels like an orphan now. Now he is so exhausted- he can hardly stay awake for anything and he's in pain. Mental and physical. He has been running fevers, having swelling in legs and abdomen, and as of last night has lost his appetite. The doctors have mentioned his heart...I don't know what to think. Also he has Hep C and has had that for quite a while. We are also on day 3 being off heroin, and even with the help of buprenorphine, Kratom, Xanax and Cannabis we still feel pretty rough. He hasn't wanted to go in to the ER because they have a very hard time finding a vein, plus he hasn't been clean so he was worried about that. What could be wrong? He has a doctor's appointment Monday the 14th and he promised me that he would go in to the hospital if he wasn't doing better by then. I'm beside myself with worry. Does anyone know of any miracle cure? Please help- I'm so scared. Thanks.
4 Responses
Avatar universal
H withdrawl will make him feel like he is going to die. But he won't. I assume he is a seasoned addict and knows what H withdrawl feels like. If he seems to be suffering from unfamiliar symptoms, get to the ER. They won't judge him for being an addict, they'll just treat him. I hope he decides to get help.

As for you, I noticed the pronoun you used, "we." He's coming off H, not you. I strongly STRONGLY suggest you get to alanon asap. As the loved one of an addict, this will spiritually and mentally kill you if you don't separate yourself in a healthy way.

Good luck, there will be other posters coming on here as well.
Avatar universal
I apologize, I just realize that you may actually be coming off heroin, too! Are you considering getting clean?  
5 Comments
Hello, and thank you for your response! Yes, I am also coming off heroin. It's been tough but mostly because my poor fiance now has a huge abscess on his left buttock that is SO hot to the touch... I didn't know about it until today but I started putting good quality lavender, tea tree and peppermint essential oils on it along with hot compresses. He's so feverish too even with ibuprofen. He has been taking too much ibprofen and he also has Hep C (almost 30 years) so I hate giving him anything, especially anything with acetaminophen! We are clean now....but now this abscess is HUGE on his buttock and hot to the touch..... We have a doctor appointment tomorrow and that's what we've decided we will do is go to that and see what the doc says to do. Thank you so very much for your response. I appreciate this more than you know.
it sounds like he has a raging infection possibly on his way to going septic? I'm a nurse please get him to the ER ASAP now now now please does he have a history of endocarditis? from abcesses from using needles? please get him to the er today
Please let us know how your doctors appointment went.  I agree with kellygirll that he has a raging infection and should be looked at immediately.  
We are going in in just a little bit to the ER. Last night he started getting a little better, even enough to eat something! So we were so encouraged....but in the night he got worse again and the abscess itself looks more "progressed"(?) and more sore. There is no known history of endocarditis but I worry about that or sepsis as well (based on what I've read). He has had a few abscesses before, one of which he had to get lanced several years ago. Yes, from using needles. He injected his own blood into the muscle which he's smart enough to know not to do, but was ill, and therefore says he was too lazy to go filter it properly.
He just did a course of doxycycline too for basically the equivalent of a diabetic foot sore, except he's not diabetic. We're not certain what the reason is and we have to get to the bottom of that too. He's so hard to draw though, and last time they just poked and poked to no avail and when in the hospital another time, got a 105 degree fever from some idiot not using gloves to put an IV line in his neck! He worries about that.  I want to thank everyone for responding. It means SO much!
Avatar universal
Curious as to how things went at the doctors.
1 Comments
Hi and thanks for asking.  He was in the hospital for almost a week, and has been home only two days now. He was indeed septic and therefore, a really scary situation but he's out now and doing pretty good, considering. But our car is totaled now- it actually caught on fire yesterday and fire truck had to be called and all.... my poor honey. He loved that Jetta, and had it paid off and all. I just feel so bad for him but the car is hardly what's important.... Thank God he's going to be okay.
Avatar universal
I’m glad he’s on the mend. Thank you for letting us know how things went.
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