Can someone help me with their experience...

[Heroin4Life]

I am an addict, but i've been clean off opiates a little over a month now. Ive been trying to get sober about 5 yrs now, in and out, rehab and relapse. Sober and using etc. Im trying everything I can this time to get it and so far I think im doing the right things with support system and getting involved in AA, as much as I can. Lots of meetings, sponsor, etc. The thing is, I am  tapering off of suboxone. I was addicted to oxycontin, then heroin, and despite my recent relapse, ive been taking suboxone (prescribed) for around a year and a half now. I am tapering off from 6mg a day (3mg in the morning, 3mg in the afternoon/early evening), and trying to do it as fast as possible. I don't have any experience coming off of long term sub use, as I am doing now, ive only ever used it short term in between getting high to try and hold off the wd's, and I don't really have anyone around me who's experienced it either and can understand what the process will be like. I also don't really feel like I can talk about it in the rooms because there is a lot of opinions/judgments regarding suboxone in AA. Even though I am getting off it, I still don't feel comfortable sharing that on a group level. So far i'm down to 4mg and i'm starting to feel it. Waking up drenched in sweat, not sleeping well, irritable and depressed at night after it's been a while since my last dose. Less energy. Nothing too horrible yet, but I can feel it starting and I am wondering if anyone can share their experience/process tapering and getting off subs, how they felt at each stage, how long it took, etc. I think I make it out worse in my own mind because I don't know what to expect. With heroin or oxycontin, i've detoxed so many times I know exactly what its gonna be like and in some ways that helps me get through it, but with subs, I really don't know except that i've heard the detox process goes on for a long long time. So, if anyone can help me by telling me about their experience tapering and getting off (in as much detail as you want!!) it would be really appreciated. My end goal is to be completely off it as soon as possible but when I start feeling sick, the "addict" voices in my head start to tell me im making a mistake, that I should stay on it, that I am not strong enough for this taper, that I am better/my sobriety is better when I am on it etc. I know it's BS but its what happens for me. Any help is super appreciated. Thank you.

[motye51]

I came off of a pretty high dose of subs Jan 1st, 2014. I am currently 4 1/2 months. There are a couple of things I see in what u wrote that will need to be discussed. If u are trying to avoid w/d off of the subs then a fast taper is not the way to go....slow, slow. Slow! I did a fast taper within like a week and a half...I went from 24mg, 16mg, 8, blah, blah, then quit c/t. I had no idea about suboxones long half life. But this is the way I had to do it, for me. Had it been easy I wouldn't have gotten clean! But that's just me. After 2/3 days full blown w/d came on and it took approx 21 days to start feeling a little better but truly, for me, it was more like 30. As far as A/A, I wonder if u wouldn't feel more comfortable in N/A? I do n/a 4xs a week but I did start with a/a until someone said something about alcohol being legal and drugs aren't. That's when I switched and I love n/a. Have made really good friends there. And yes, your right, there is a stigma with being on the subs and going to meetings, but u need to go to the meetings? Kind of a catch 22....we have some people in our meetings on the subs and they attend many meetings, they just don't pick up key tags for length of time clean. They start that once they're done the subs.
I found the sub w/d hard but doable. When do u intend to c/t it??? Stay in touch and let us know....good luck!

[Heroin4Life]

thank you for your response. i just cant handle this slow progression taper and im trying cold turkey as of today. part of me thinks i am better on the subs. more outgoing, less depressed, not high by any means, but just more into my life. i dunno if thats just the addict in my voice trying to keep me on them. i dunno. either way, im trying to quit cold turkey starting now. i do desperately want to be sober.

[hopefullycleanagain]

Hi there, time to change that screen name, no more "4 life" for you!  You are doing too great for that!  I don't know much about sub withdrawal, but I just wanted to lend some support your way...from what I have read on this forum, it is pretty tough, but doable.  I wish you good luck and God speed in your continued recovery..Michelle

[slomedz805]

just a short comment.. it has to do with your will doesnt program say something like "if theres a will theres a way" if at one time you were willing to detox off other powerfull opiates dont be afraid to do it again! Im not a profesional so i suggest to always consult a doctor first. But my experience is its not as bad as you think but things linger such as chills and emotions.. but everyone is different.

[Familyman239]

Bro that's the Suboxone devil talking to ya. I had same exact thoughts as you, "I feel good on subs" that lasted a good 2 years! Though (every1 is different) But I read a study that between 6month to 3 years that sub users No longer r happy on the stuff it will do the exact opposite give u little energy and a lot of depression and self loathing. It did and has for me at least. I'm 7 year addict and the last 3 on Suboxone and Ive tapered using "google Robert325" it has actually worked! The key is FOR ME was lower dosage every 4 days. As of rite this second I am 5days-12hrs from my last sub dose. And I haven't had 1 Withdrawel symptom! Still waiting for something to happen to me but that taper planned worked. I can't believe I haven't stuck a pill n my mouth n 5days. Very empowering. There's a lot of very good people here that will help u get thru this.  I'm no dr but if in anyway I can help U just write me at ***@**** I've got folders and years of trying to kick. I can send u gr8 info that's been found online! Good Luck and Stay positive

[gunzandroses]

It is up to you the programs are good but to me the only reason people relapse is because they are not ready to quit or they don't want to . I'm trying to kick a habit myself  I said I was going to stop a million time but wasn't able to. But this time I feel different a I feel like I want to. I understand her I on is a hard thing to kick so my advise to you is to take the sub's to stop the withdraw the when you feel OK don't take them anymore you don't want to start another habit

[Heroin4Life]

thanks 4 all the support, i just wanna get it over with and so thats what im trying to do. im just not good tapering. its been one day now. i can feel it starting.

[Heather8448]

IDK suboxin but i did methadone and i will tell u what they told me, pull up a seat stay for a while reach out and know this will end, it sucked for me but its been almost a year you can do this! I told myself it took YEARS to mess this up and a few weeks of discomfort is what I diserve I pushed through it with the help of this site it saved my life WELCOME and you never have to use again