Day 111 and still not back to normal

[mama23babies]

I am 111 days off of hydro's and mentally I am still not where I want to be. I still have anxiety and fatigue and a little depression. I just feel so funny when I go out to the store or I am around people. I hate to be alone because the anxiety still really scares me. I had several panic attacks from my anxiety in the beginning of my detox and that was really scary. I just want to feel normal. My oldest daughter has some school activities coming up but I'm not even sure if I can go because I just feel so uncomfortable around people still. Is this in anyway normal this far into the process.Thanks

[Calamity2]

It will get better. The first 90 days is quite an adjustment to performing without our doc. They seemed to "help" us get the work done. But that is a lie. As I get time away from hydro oxy etc etc.  I realize that I now have more energy than the drugs ever gave me. Don't start glamorizing what they did for you, in you head. Believe ME Please!!!   We think people don't have a clue when we are buzzing on opiates. I had a disabled child tell me I should stop !!  I worked a 80 hour work week. I thought it appeared that I had my stuff together. Then theres the $$$$$$$$$$    Please Think Think Think

[mama23babies]

I'm sorry you have had to go through this too. I know exactly what you mean about the mental earthquake and going crazy. I felt like this alot in the beginning. I can say I fee better than in the beginning but it's still hard. I just want to function normally again without the anxiety and all the what if thoughts. I hope you are doing well.

[mama23babies]

I will look into the Dr. Thanks for the info

[mama23babies]

I try to get out and walk.  I have three children under 5 so I do alot of chasing and cleaning after them. It's hard to get to a gym with the kids.

[ZJILLIAN]

I remember the really big detox I had years ago. I was taking a lot of everything and drinking every night quietly at home. The WD was marked with the most horrific anxiety ever. I thought I was absolutely going crazy. The pain of it was not tolerable. I was in a tough love nasty rehab and terrified by the other patients.

How long did this type of trouble last? Unfortunately the first year clean was very hard, very very uncomfortable socially (actually still am). I had used alcohol and drugs in order to enjoy social things so without it........ I know that I have experienced what you are experiencing . Absolutely. Over the years I tried lots of anti-depressants and they all made me worse until I found a doctor who actually listened to me about my physical symptoms and seemed to understand the different types of anxiety and depression, and appreciated how individuals are all so different.

I believe this suffering after WD is inevitable. You can't just eliminate a drug without having the equivalent of a mental earthquake. What is important is that you learn some survival skills in order to ride this out. Because it really does get better!!! The anxiety does stop. I strongly suggest anything you can find about relaxation exercises and tricks people learn who do carry a large load of anxiety. Search the internet under: relaxation exercises and progressive relaxation. Buy tapes, do yoga. Read about anxiety get self-help CDs (they really work although my husband can't believe I listen to "that junk").  See yourself as the warrior that you are. It is a battle but you have support from this forum and lots and lots of people who have experienced just what you are going though.

[ImGettingClean]

Have you heard of Doctor Daniel G. Amen?

He has a few books and DVDs out and it's very beneficial, especially for Depression/anxiety...a lot of times, dr's prescribe anti-anxiety/anti-depressants without really understanding what type of anxiety or depression one has...it's like a doctor giving you a band-aid when you go in for a headache...

for some, 5-htp & St johns wort works better than prescribed meds, but only if you know what type of anxiety or depression you have...

if you google him and do some research (if you haven't heard of him), there's a wealth of info out there....

Nick

btw, congrats on 111 days!!!!!!! thats greatttt!

[Struggeling09]

Hey congrats on your time. I don't know your physical condition but have you tried going to the gym? Exercise is key in recovery. My girlfriend joined shapes after the first week of wds. She loves it. I know its hard to find motivation for exercise but i can almost gurantee a faster recovery if you hit the gym at least 3 times a week. This should help with the anxiety, give it a try.

[mama23babies]

I am see a pyschiatrist and a therapist. I have always worried alot but never had panic attacks or anything major like this. I have tried 6 or 7 different anitdepressants and they all make me way worse. I also take xanax when I need it but I hate not feeling normal. I want to be able to go to my daughters functions like a normal mother. The anxiety just keeps me from doing that sometimes. I do have good days but I have alot more bad days than what I would like

[Cassie415]

Do you think it's possible you have anxiety or depression outside of the opiate detox? Did you ever experience anxiety or depression before becoming addicted? If not, it's possible you may have developed it? I don't know your history but maybe a doctor could help by prescribing an anti-depressant or anti-anxiety medication. Also have you tried some of the natural vitamins that are supposed to help with those? I'm sorry you are still experiencing this, those are two of my least favorite feelings when coming off the opiates.