Day 20-LOADS of self doubt

[finally_sober]

Hey everyone. Today makes 20 days for me. Overall physically I feel pretty good but my emotions are a wreck. I'm very happy with my decision to detox and I feel better than I have in years, but I find myself obsessing over my marriage and whether or not my husband loves me. I'm doubting if nursing school is the right choice after I've worked so hard to get all of my prerequisite classes done. I'm absolutely overwhelmed by all the doubt I feel. Advice welcome. Thanks.

[finally_sober]

Thank you guys so much for the support! It's nice to have an outlet where people actually understand what you're going through!

[toothfairie]

congrats on 20 days!  that's great!  just focus on YOU and try not to worry about what's coming up unless you just have to...take one day at a time....emotions will be all over the place for awhile...so just ride it out....long calming deep breaths....good luck and keep posting for support!  you can get thru this!  20 days is awesome!  :)

[selfinduced]

Ohhh Girl, You have just brought back a flood of memories for me. This is all part of the healing. Stay as level as you can in your everyday and give your brain time to heal. Think of it like this.....After a death of a loved one they say not to make any decisions for a year due to your grieving emotions. Kicking drugs is the same. Hold tight and enjoy your accomplishment in losing the meds. THEN, if after several months your still off kilter, you'll be better equipt mentally and physically to upright the things in your life that need tweaking. Your doing great honee. One day at a time.

[Bkitty]

Congrats on 20days!! Its normal to have some anxiety in the beginning. More time will pass and everything will seem "normal" again. I felt weird in the beginning as well and it took time till I was comfortable in my own skin again. Hang in there. You are doing great! ((hugs))

[ang_811]

First off congrats on 20 days. They say for every active year in addiction it takes that many months for our emotions to finally balance out. Ur early on on ur recovery. It's suggested that we don't make any big decisions the first year. Ur mind is racing from I e thing to another. Don't put more on ur plate than u can handle. Don't dwell on them. Focuss on u right now, keep doing the next right thing and everything else will fall into place. The answers will be revealed when the time is right.

Again congrats on 20 days. Everyday gets better n better.

[Sweetness91]

You said it best...your emotions are a wreck! That's what this stuff does to you, but you just have to keep pushing through it. You just HAVE to! I found that when I started coming off methadone I had every thought cross my mind...thoughts I hadn't had in years. But that's what the stuff does to you after awhile...it numbs you. I would never doubt the love your husband has for you...if he stuck with you while you were using...he will stick by you when you are trying to do the right thing and get clean! And I have to say, I wouldn't make any decisions about nursing school right now...dont mess up your future because the withdrawal is messing with your head! I'm on 24 1/2 days and I still have a hard time deciding what to make for dinner!! Lol. Congrats on your clean time! As I like to say..."keep on truckin' til you're on the exit ramp to freedom". Good luck.