Day one...Again

[Charetti]

OK. Second time around but I am committed.  I turn 50 on the 19th and I do not want to start that decade as an addict.  My guts are rolling, my head is foggy, I am freezing, etc. I did taper down a bit so I think that helped. Got the doctor to help me which isnt an easy thing to confess to.  Also told my pharmacy, equally embarrassing.  However they all understand and there are so many people with the same problem.

I am just looking for some encouraging words.  Thanks for being here!

[HURTIN58]

you can do this...look here for all the lil hints..post to vent. shower shower shower!!!!!!! cry cry cry!!!!!! we are here for you...peace

[Charetti]

Day 3 and doing OK.  Body aches are way worse this time around.  I woke up this morning and felt good for about 15 minutes and then I had that wash of uckiness come over me again. However I did walk the dog and sat outside for a bit.

[WantToBeNormalAgain]

Hey there,
Its such a tough battle, and you're doing fantastic!! It's the easiest thing, to beat ourselves up and secretly wish for 'one more'....Easy ways out like we're used to. Im over 2 years out, but it took 2 arrests and a psych ward to straighten me out. Im happy now in a way that I used to think impossible - I just posted to someone how annoyed I was at people that said that to me, and I thought 'yeah, well that's never going to happen for me'. But very slowly but more surely, little things would change. I thought they were insignificant but they weren't. And you confessing to your dr and pharmacy (albeit mortifying) is a HUGE step. You're cutting your resources. Huge, congrats on that!

Also, in my opinion, this thing is a disease. You're recovering from an illness so do what you can and no more. You'll soon notice that little things like showering become easier and automatic. Don't get discouraged if things aren't easy right now. You've done this before, you just weren't ready. Now you are. And don't let others get you down when/if they say 'what's different this time?' - god I hate that line. Just know that you have it within yourself to move up and on. Have faith in yourself, and surround yourself with positive people. Ive got my husband and my best friend (and maybe my mom)to support and encourage me. My brother and sister are no longer a part of my life. That was hard, but a better choice, as no negativity is allowed in my life. Please keep going, because it's a lot easier to live sober than it is to chase your DOC.

[bmdad]

Hey Charetti...it has been a long time! Most of us have dealt with more than one round of this so don't beat yourself up. You kicked its butt the first time around so you know what you need to do. This time just figure out what made you just back on them and do all you can to make the changes that need to be made. Actually, you may have already made some changes. I don't remember if you filled your doctor in last go around. I do remember that your doctor worked with you during your taper by only give you so many every few days or something like that. I always continued going back until I fessed up to my doctor and I'm now over two years clean so feel that is a must. When seeing a doctor for chronic pain for years it's all too easy to schedule an appointment and tell him you're in pain. Since they already know that I suffered with chronic pain they would write a script without hesitating. Now that he knows I abused my pills I'm sure it wouldn't be quite so easy which is a great thing.

You know we're here for you. Push through the pain and discomfort. You'll be feeling better in no time.

Best of luck!




Brian

[selfinduced]

You are my idol! That is the goal I set for myself to...the big 50, and guess what. I am doing it. Just as you, I want my next 50 years to be healthier and more memorable. I am so excited for you. Please give yourself 30 days clean and you will see what you have been missing. Routing for you.....enjoy the ride, goo , bad, and the beautiful!. It is within you...go for it. xo

[IwillDoThis]

you were detoxing off opiates and the hospital gave you an opiate?  Incredible, did they know you were withdrawing?  Yes I would imagine you will probably start over somewhat - it would be no different than you taking an opiate during withdrawal - it just prolongs the pain.  Probably not what you want to hear............We really need to be our own advocate and educate ourselves when it comes to this stuff - how many times have we heard how Tramadol is a non-addictive pain medication only to see how many people have struggled with Tram addiction?  Crazy docs

[NorthEast213]

Jody

Thats a tough call.  It may prolong your w/d but shouldnt put you at square 1.  What was the cause of the pain?  Dont fear what is ahead of you just stay in the moment.  If you are determined then you can get through this.

[NorthEast213]

Charetti congrats on your decision.  You made an awesome choice to tell your doctor and even pharmacy.  Im not sure what you were taking and how much ??  This will help determine how your detox will go.  Just know that you are not alone!  I quit CT from oxy 280mg a day 28 days ago.  the first week *****. days 3-5 usually the worst but you will get through it.  Gatorade, Immodium, vitamins and force yourself to get some walking in.  Post here often and read alot it really helps.
Don't fear what is to come, it only makes it worse.  You can handle it, trust me.

Sean

[jodyl300]

i have a question.. i have been off vicodin for almost 3 days and i went to the hospital because my stomach hurt so bad.. i just though theres no way this could be part of the withdrawl's.. so the gave me a small dose of morphine.. well my question is am i going to have to start all over again???? after getting through the 2 roughest days i have had in my life...

[IwillDoThis]

I like your attitude and know that you are not alone.   We all came here in different ways and I think it's great that you want to change your life - me too!  There are so many of us - I was a pain mgmt patient also and things just got out of hand as it tends to do whether you are abusing and take more than prescribed or not.

Welcome and post for support - I've found so many great people on here and it helps knowing you are not alone.